All of those definitions have to do with sin; trespasses; admonishments; rebukes. I don't know what version you're referring to.....but, I believe that Matthew 18 has to do with a person in sin:
Matthew 18:15 "If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.
I'm only saying that I don't believe it's applicable when a person is merely doing something *we* (personally) believe is "out of step" (especially if we weren't involved and are hearing about it second-hand). To ask someone if everything is okay is one thing (and I doubt anyone would disagree with that).....it's when two or three people are then involved to carry it further. If they don't wish to share with you (individually)....and it's not a sin issue......I don't understand why you'd involve even more people. To me....that seems like harassment....not love.
lol....so you don't really want to show me where I have this wrong...okay....as to the specifics of this paragraph, I'm not extremely confused. You started out talking about someone pulling out of a ministry project. Now people do this all the time, so in order for you to bring this up in this thread topic, it must mean that it is a personal issue for you...that is, they left you short handed or something. I mean, if your just being a busy body and trying to run everyone's life for them, that is an obvious, your in the wrong, and as far as I'm concerned doesn't apply to the discussion at hand. So, in order for it to apply to the OP question as I understand the OP question, there must be a reason why it upsets you. That is, something like being left short handed, or feeling guilty because you may have said or done something to drive them away...in which case, you need to go talk to them, just as Matt. 18 tells us to do, and as per the definition, I already pointed out the parts that are not specific to sin, so just proclaiming me to be wrong, doesn't address our conflict, nor help me to understand what I have wrong...okay, so back to the topic...something happened, you may be wrong or they may be wrong...you explore your own heart in the light of God as previously discussed, and cannot find any evil lurking on your part...so you follow Matt. 18 and go to them and say, "what gives, you left me short handed" (remember, we already ruled out that it's just your being judgmental) If you don't get any satisfaction, why wouldn't you take someone as a witness? The guy left you short handed...come on...not necessarily a sin, but worthy of reconciliation none the less, and in line with the definition given for Matt. 18
So maybe, the guy didn't leave you short handed, but you may or may not have done something to offend them...again, Matt. 18 is helpful and in line with the definitions, whether a sin or not. So you go, and he acts angry, refuses to talk to you as if he is upset...how wouldn't taking a witness help? You take a witness, say, "dude, I'm sorry if I offended you but we are called to the ministry of reconciliation, and I want to reconcile this with you. I didn't think it was offensive, but maybe I got it wrong...help me to figure this out so that I can prevent it from happening to the glory of God." (kind of like my asking you to show me what I have wrong in this issue)
The only other option I see, is the one we talked about that I excluded as it did not seem to apply to the OP question. Much as a poster you are familiar with, confessed in another thread with me, but did and will refuse to admit or accept responsibility for...that of judgment. For example in the case I am referring to, another poster admitted to having a problem with me because he/she didn't like my posting style...that is easy to see in light of scripture as judgment and the sin of the one who said it, especially in light of how many people respond positively to my posts. Judgment is usually pretty easy to spot, if that was your intent with the OP. Some of the markers of judgment are 1. no evidence to support it being a wide spread matter...for example in this case, it has all the markers of being a personal matter and not inclusive of a lot of other people. Another example would be the situation going on in our church right now. There was/is an issue with the Ass. pastor, he tried to paint a picture of it being just a couple of people being upset, when in reality and the evidence confirmed, it was wide spread. 2. there is no evidence of the person being wrong...iow's all the complaints and accusations are unfounded. If let's say, I'm upset because I heard that X did Y, but cannot find any evidence to support that X did Y, then it's most likely rumor and I would be sinning against X to give it any weight. 3. motive is a big one. In fact, the goal, purpose, motive behind love, which is what we are commanded to do and would be the only reason that we have to explore the OP question, is to reconcile/restore...so if there is no purpose of reconciliation/restoration involved, then it is lack of love at best, and more than likely judgment. 4. Lack of purpose within the body. The body has a purpose and that purpose is to build one another up in the faith. This is related to 3 but since I want to be totally fair we can separate the two. If the complaint does not aim to build X or myself in the faith, it is more than likely just jealousy or pride based judgment.
Finally, as previously stated, prayer is always the first step...if you are being judgmental, prayer of cleansing your heart...if the other person needs help, prayer for guidance on how to help them.
I can't even begin to fathom what else you might have intended in the OP that I missed. But again, I'm anxious to find out what I am missing.
That also seems to be what 1st Peter 4:15 is instructing *against*:
If you suffer, however, it must not be for murder, stealing, making trouble, or prying into other people's affairs.~1st Peter 4:15
the context is this suffering, trials, etc. Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: 13 But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
14 If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.
15 But let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an evildoer, or as a busybody in other men's matters.[/quote] so we are talking about suffering for the sake of Christ...what I seem to be missing is what suffering the OP is referring to? I already talked about person X doing something to offend person Y and vise versa...already talked about judgment which I didn't even think we were including in the OP...so what else am I missing? What suffering on behalf of Christ are you referring to in the OP question? As to the busy body thing, absolutely, but that goes back to being judgmental, which I originally thought was excluded from the question. So if you want to talk about busy bodies, they need to first, reconcile with God, then, reconcile with the person they had an issue with, especially since this type of busybody usually leads to gossip, slander, and other lies. That means you would have been in sin and taking Matt. 18 off the table when you are being a busybody in someone elses life, is a violation of even your interpretation of Matt. 18.
16 Yet if any man suffer as a Christian, let him not be ashamed; but let him glorify God on this behalf.
17 For the time is come that judgment must begin at the house of God: and
if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God?
18 And if the righteous scarcely be saved, where shall the ungodly and the sinner appear?
19 Wherefore let them that suffer according to the will of God commit the keeping of their souls to him in well doing, as unto a faithful Creator.
Now, here is the heart of the passage you referred us to, that the answer as I said above, is to examine your own heart, to see if there is any wicked way in you...to cleanse your own heart from all unrighteousness, to mature in your own faith to the point in which judgment is not a part of the new creation you have become. See, this is what I still fail to grasp...if you are judging, cleanse yourself, God will reveal your judgmental heart if you ask Him to...if your not judgmental, you need to go to the person and help them to grow in their faith....the answer is always God through the working of the HS within. Just as I already said....1. pray 2. confront according to Matt. 18..and if you are the judge in this case, then you still need to follow Matt. 18. 3. if there is no offense, then what is the OP asking? Cause all I see in the question is someone is offended/not happy with someone else...if everyone is happy and there is no offense what is the OP asking? and why?