how long you should u date someone before marriage

[Forealzchola]

Hello thanks everyone for responses my boyfriend and i will have been together for a year in august. We have our first trip "semi alone" together for a 2night, 3 days with a younger cousin of mine that my mom gave to us..my boyfriend is in no way ready to get married..he just doesnt possess husband readiness and idk he was just raised in the ghetto so our ways of handeling things are still very different like he still believes its ok to get into fights over words like dude fist fights and i think that is so immature..he hangs around alot of drug dealers, drug users, and his sisters are prostitutes..idk maybe this is him being christ like..but i dont want my children around it down the line if we get married and have any

 

[TheDag]

That's part of the problem with our society today. For hundreds of years, couples got married young, but usually stayed together no matter how hard it got. In many cases, marriages were arranged, so finding Mr. or Miss Right was often impractical.

Yeah but also in those days people actually learnt more about sexuality at an earlier age than they do now. Society generally these days wants to hush it up and not talk about it. Thats part of why sex sells. It is a taboo subject. We bring alot of these problems on ourselves.

 

[TheDag]

At least two years. Every relationship I have had usually lasts at least a year and falls apart before the second. In every case a man shows different sides he didn't show the first year, and I change a bit too. Since it's a lifelong commitment, at least two years before marriage is recommended from me anyway.

it is always worth remembering that people can easily hid the true selves for a short period of time so as you say a longer time is needed. I find it rare the person who can tell as soon as they meet someone what they are truly like. Usually it is women who can do this.

 

[frankjavier21x]

(my views are based on christian views) marriage will come at the end of understanding that it is time for the both of you, that it is not for yourself that it is understanding that God has made the two of you to be together and no one can come in between that, when you both realize that you both can and will fight to make the relationship with your partner work no matter what in the name of Jesus for our God. you will know when you understand.

 

[frankjavier21x]

remember to search seek study and the answers will come. ask yourself how much have i really looked into this?, how much have i prayed?, how much have i read? how much have i asked and talked to my partner? what is my goal when i date someone? Do not look for the quickest answer. dedicate yourself to what you want to know and the knowledge will flood you.. you have to become your own detective your own scientist and your own judge. good luck with your search, and if you need anything else my name is frank

 

[Forealzchola]

thx frank

 

[frankjavier21x]

of course! anytime