How does the bible define marriage.

[Sammy-San]

Marriage existed before Judaism and Christianity. That confuses me, because Judaism and Christianity were how God first revealed through prophets how he wanted people to live. In indigenous cultures, and even in different cultures around the world, what defines it is different.

What is the bibical definition, exactly? I'm confused. I was always interested in analyzing every detail of the Bible, but this is one topic that I find somewhat enigmatic.

I've heard people say the legal institution of marriage is different (but yet closely connected) to the religious sacrament of matrimony. Is that true or false?

 

[dysert]

Marriage existed before Judaism and Christianity. That confuses me, because Judaism and Christianity were how God first revealed through prophets how he wanted people to live. In indigenous cultures, and even in different cultures around the world, what defines it is different.

What is the bibical definition, exactly? I'm confused. I was always interested in analyzing every detail of the Bible, but this is one topic that I find somewhat enigmatic.

I've heard people say the legal institution of marriage is different (but yet closely connected) to the religious sacrament of matrimony. Is that true or false?

This is a good topic. Let's begin with some Scripture:

Gen. 2:24 -> This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh.

Matt. 19:4-5 -> "Haven't you read," He replied, "that He who created them in the beginning made them male and female," and He also said: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh?

1 Cor. 7:2 -> But because sexual immorality is so common, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.

Eph. 5:25, 31-32 -> Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her ... For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church.

In all these verses we see that marriage is between one man and one woman. That rules out SSM, plural marriages, and any other type of "marriage" *as defined in the Bible*. We also see from the Ephesians verses that marriage is in a way a type of Christ's relationship with the Church. Here again we have one groom and one bride. Such is biblical marriage.

Now the government has taken over the rule of deciding about marriage, so that in the US, the state decides who is married. As with all government rules, they can be changed. Personally I draw a distinction between biblical marriage and government marriage -- especially now that they no longer are talking about the same thing. The fact of life is that to enjoy the benefits of marriage these days you have to get the government's ok. A religious ceremony is merely a celebration of the union and has no legal status.

 

[abysmul]

dysert is spot on. In society, here in the USA, "marriage" is defined and governed by the government (man), but when we are talking Biblical marriage I let God define it. I personally would like to see the government out of it, and let individuals and their faiths decide what marriage is, but that slippery slope has been slid so far down we'll never see that sort of change (too many laws and too much investment by the government in the marriage business).

 

[Xalith]

Saying that "Marriage existed before Judaism and Christianity" while being a Christian is something I had to do a double-take on.

Of course it existed before Mosaic Law; it goes all the way back to Adam and Eve starting in Genesis 2:24 as the @dysert already mentioned.

Now since Genesis, Mankind had kinda forgotten or perhaps didn't understand, that man was to have one wife, and one wife only, and that woman was to have one husband and one husband only, for even in the days of Jacob, this wasn't the case (Jacob himself had children with four different women).

Therefore, in Leviticus, God set the rules in stone (literally!) that there is to be one husband and one wife together. But even then, this wasn't actually practiced during the days of the kings, even Solomon had many concubines and wives.

This was probably one of the reasons why Jesus went even a step further than Levitical Law did, and said "even looking at a woman in lust is committing adultery with her" (pp) because of all of the sexual immorality throughout the years.

 

[dragongunner]

Pretty much agree with what has been said so far. To me it seems that marriage was a agreement to be husband and wife. Unlike today with all the "laws" of established by government. And wedding rings….lol on that. People think they have been around forever.

 

[Sketcher]

Matthew 19:4-9 sums it up.

 

[Job8]

Marriage existed before Judaism and Christianity

Before Judaism and Christianity, there was creation, and God performed the first marriage. It was Adam who prophetically defined marriage as one man and one woman who "shall be one flesh" (Gen 2:23,24), but in doing so he also prophesied about the mystery of the union of Christ and His Church (the Lamb's Wife) (Eph 5:30-33). The institution of marriage is worldwide, and goes back all the way to creation, but Christian marriage is supposed to typify the union and communion of Christ and His eternal Wife.

 

[dayhiker]

I guess I see several different types of marriages in the Bible. I also don't see many commands saying marriages should be this way or that way.
All thru Bible times it was the parents that often defined who was to get married. It was a marriage that was to align the families and help them survive.
The Bible time were patriarchal in their culture. So the Bible is written from that perspective. But the Bible doesn't command us to be partriarcal. So
I think we have to understand how to take what the Bible says and apply it to our culture.

 

[Xalith]

I guess I see several different types of marriages in the Bible. I also don't see many commands saying marriages should be this way or that way.
All thru Bible times it was the parents that often defined who was to get married. It was a marriage that was to align the families and help them survive.
The Bible time were patriarchal in their culture. So the Bible is written from that perspective. But the Bible doesn't command us to be partriarcal. So
I think we have to understand how to take what the Bible says and apply it to our culture.

While that might be true, Christ Himself gave a better outline of marriage:

1). Between one man and one woman.
2). No Divorce (except for infidelity).
3). Marrying a divorcee (except for infidelity) is considered adultery.
4). Sex without marriage is forbidden.

That pretty much sums the whole thing up. Not sure what else really needed to be said.

EDIT: I will admit that nowadays we also have abusive relationships where one spouse will physically abuse the other. I don't know if Christ would make an exception for these kinds of toxic relationships or not, but I've heard a few pastors who seem to lean that way, that abusive spouses would be included in "acceptable divorce". Christ never said that in the Bible, but then again, I wonder just how many husbands abused their wives back during His ministry.

 

[dayhiker]

I guess from my study of the theological debate that was going on around Dt.24:1 when Jesus was asked this question in in Mt.19
I don't see any of your conclusions being taught by these verse.

 

[tulipbee]

I read another lame excuse for gay marriage: it's better to marry than to burn.

 

[dysert]

"Lame" is right.

 

[Xalith]

I guess from my study of the theological debate that was going on around Dt.24:1 when Jesus was asked this question in in Mt.19
I don't see any of your conclusions being taught by these verse.

Who is that directed at? Me?

Well, I said...

1). Between one man and one woman. (Matthew 19:4-5)
2). No Divorce (except for infidelity). (Matthew 19:8-9) (note He said "and from the beginning it was not so" which means Moses was in error)
3). Marrying a divorcee (except for infidelity) is considered adultery. (again, Matthew 19:9)
4). Sex without marriage is forbidden. (many places in the Bible. This is the very definition of "Fornication").

So what part of what I said do you believe is not taught by Jesus in Matthew 19?

 

[dayhiker]

I generally don't direct my posts at any. I just post and people can respond how they want or not.

 

[Xalith]

I generally don't direct my posts at any. I just post and people can respond how they want or not.

Well, when you use the phrase "I don't see what you're saying in these verses" (pp), it generally helps to pick out the part you are talking about (and/or who the 'you' is), especially when 5+ people offered their views and opinions.

When you do things ambiguously like that, then you get a bunch of posts of people defending their positions even though you weren't even referring to them, which is kinda a waste of time.

Just trying to give suggestions on how to hold better debates, tis all.

 

[dayhiker]

Thanks, I'll try to express myself better next time.

 

[dysert]

Thanks, I'll try to express myself better next time.

Use of the "Reply" link is quite helpful as well if your post is referring to someone's post in particular.

 

[Sammy-San]

This is a good topic. Let's begin with some Scripture:

Gen. 2:24 -> This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh.

Matt. 19:4-5 -> "Haven't you read," He replied, "that He who created them in the beginning made them male and female," and He also said: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh?

1 Cor. 7:2 -> But because sexual immorality is so common, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.

Eph. 5:25, 31-32 -> Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her ... For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church.

In all these verses we see that marriage is between one man and one woman. That rules out SSM, plural marriages, and any other type of "marriage" *as defined in the Bible*. We also see from the Ephesians verses that marriage is in a way a type of Christ's relationship with the Church. Here again we have one groom and one bride. Such is biblical marriage.

Now the government has taken over the rule of deciding about marriage, so that in the US, the state decides who is married. As with all government rules, they can be changed. Personally I draw a distinction between biblical marriage and government marriage -- especially now that they no longer are talking about the same thing. The fact of life is that to enjoy the benefits of marriage these days you have to get the government's ok. A religious ceremony is merely a celebration of the union and has no legal status.

But doesn't the religious ceremony make it holy matrimony, which gives the marriage a sacred and religious context and meaning?

 

[Sammy-San]

Saying that "Marriage existed before Judaism and Christianity" while being a Christian is something I had to do a double-take on.

Of course it existed before Mosaic Law; it goes all the way back to Adam and Eve starting in Genesis 2:24 as the @dysert already mentioned.

Now since Genesis, Mankind had kinda forgotten or perhaps didn't understand, that man was to have one wife, and one wife only, and that woman was to have one husband and one husband only, for even in the days of Jacob, this wasn't the case (Jacob himself had children with four different women).

Therefore, in Leviticus, God set the rules in stone (literally!) that there is to be one husband and one wife together. But even then, this wasn't actually practiced during the days of the kings, even Solomon had many concubines and wives.

This was probably one of the reasons why Jesus went even a step further than Levitical Law did, and said "even looking at a woman in lust is committing adultery with her" (pp) because of all of the sexual immorality throughout the years.

But how did the Institution itself exist before God spoke to Moses and gave him a covenant? Were there prophets before him? I've always speculated on that.

 

[Sierest]

Before sin came into the world, Adam and Eve were married to Christ. The institution of marriage was brought about in the moment God created Adam. Adam was "married" to God just as Christ will be "married" to the Saints.

Once sin came into the world, the "marriage" between man and God was broken and therefore marriage between a man and a women became a representation of what our "marriage" will be like with Christ. When Adam laid with Eve they were united as one flesh. When the time comes, all the Saints will be united with Christ.

God gave the people the institution of marriage so that they can then know what marriage is.

I pray that wasn't too confusing haha.