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How do i become heterosexual?

Discussion in 'Struggles with Sexuality' started by Truthseeker99, Feb 11, 2021.

  1. Truthseeker99

    Truthseeker99 New Member

    1
    +2
    Switzerland
    Reformed
    Single
    I know im not saved yet, because im still a homosexual. Know the question is, how do i overcome my homosexuality, and become heterosexual, or atleast weaken those homosexual urges until they arent noticable anymore.

    Also how do i manage to stay celibate, either until i marry a woman, or die. The issue is i live in a very liberal country, and theres no conversion therapy.
    So how do i overcome homosexuality then? Praying doesnt seem to make it go away, what do i do wrong?
     
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  2. ReesePiece23

    ReesePiece23 The Peanut Buttery Member.

    +4,583
    Christian
    Seek advice from a reliable pastor. This is too specialist for the average Joe on here.
     
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  3. SigurdReginson

    SigurdReginson Active Member

    424
    +553
    United States
    Atheist
    Single
    Have you sought counciling?
     
  4. chevyontheriver

    chevyontheriver Well-Known Member Supporter

    +10,452
    United States
    Catholic
    Married
    US-American-Solidarity
    There is a difference between your urges and what you do with those urges. What you do with your urges is the more important thing. Chastity, which is a right ordered practice of your sexuality, is a matter of refraining from sex before marriage to a person of the complementary sex, and then of practicing your sexuality in harmony with Christian teaching after marriage.

    Your urges are just that, and can be the result of many things. You may not have the ability to change those urges, or maybe you can bit by bit. Start by avoiding the triggers that stimulate your urges. Get control of your eyes and of your thoughts. Concentrate on the true and the good and the beautiful, especially the beautiful. Get out in nature. Figure out how to serve other people in need. Get out of your own head. It may all pass on it's own given time.

    There is a resource for you that is international but has no chapters in Switzerland. It does in Italy and France though, so maybe it would be helpful. That is CourageRC.net. Check them out as they are a group of same-sex attracted people who try to help each other to live chaste lives. They aren't predominantly about changing you from one kind of attraction to another but instead how to live moral and chaste lives, which of course is the more important thing.
     
  5. Michie

    Michie Human rights begin in the womb. Supporter

    +39,596
    United States
    Catholic
    Married
    US-Others
    Being homosexual is not a sin. Acting on it is. So I do not know why you think you are not saved.
     
  6. WonbyOneanddone

    WonbyOneanddone Active Member

    285
    +106
    United States
    Baptist
    Married
    You say that you are not saved yet. So how do you expect to overcome sin in your life?

    Either coming to Christ is necessary to overcome sin our lives, or we don't really need him.

    So which is it?

    This is what Christ said in John 8

    Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. 35 Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. 36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed

    First come to Christ, then have him help you overcome sin. There is no special formula for this, it is a your relationship with your Creator. It is a daily walk
     
  7. NBB

    NBB Well-Known Member Supporter

    +1,019
    Uruguay
    Christian
    Single
    'Normal' people can have urges too, and they need to overcome them the same to please God, i haven't had a girlfriend in 20 years, some time ago after lots of insisting and praying i quitted the remaining sexual sins thanks to God, accept Jesus in your life, accept his work on the cross, believe in him and follow him, if you fall 100 times get up and try again, even if it cost tears and lots of insisting is totally worth it, the Holy spirit can be the best companion you can have ever, and for we to have him fully we need to quit sexual sins, this is totally worth it all the efforts and tears friend.
    Following Jesus is a lot better than all the trash the sin can offer this is for sure.
     
  8. Tree of Life

    Tree of Life Hide The Pain

    +6,079
    United States
    Reformed
    Married
    When God saves people he does not always or immediately deliver them from sinful temptations and tendencies. All Christians will struggle against sin for their entire lives. Don't think that you're not saved simply because you struggle. Also, being saved does not mean being heterosexual. You might never be attracted to the opposite sex and that would be okay. Faithfulness for you means bearing this thorn in your flesh, resisting temptation, and not acting on homosexual desires. This is a lifelong cross to bear.
     
  9. Anthony2019

    Anthony2019 Pax et bonum! CF Ambassadors Supporter

    +8,894
    United Kingdom
    Anglican
    Single
    Always remember that God loves you, not in spite of who you are. but because of who you are.
    Find a welcoming, friendly church family.
    Chat things over with a minister, preferably one who is knowledgeable and experienced with helping people in your situation and will be able to offer you sensible advice.
    Read the Bible, pray and ask God to show you what He wants for your life.
     
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2021
  10. Carl Emerson

    Carl Emerson Well-Known Member

    +5,345
    New Zealand
    Christian
    Married
    Focus above all on being saved - visit a Pastor and discuss.

    That has to be your first priority.
     
  11. OldWiseGuy

    OldWiseGuy Wake me when it's soup. Supporter

    +9,945
    United States
    Protestant
    Single
    US-Others
    There will be two spiritual harvests, two resurrections to life or to judgment. The calling of the church in this age is the first harvest, typified by the spring barley harvest spoken of in the OT. The later, much larger wheat harvest occurs in late summer. Those not called into the church in this age will come up in the general resurrection during the millenial rule of Christ, typified by the later wheat harvest. If you are not called now you will come up then, be given God's spirit, live a physical life healed of homosexuality, be guided by the Spirit, and most certainly be given eternal life. Few will deny Christ and be condemned.

    So take heart, God has a salvation plan for everyone, not just the called in this age.

    Of course that shouldn't be a license to indulge any type of sinfulness or 'inconvenient' behavior. We still must fight against what our flesh lusts for.
     
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2021
  12. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

    +7,116
    United States
    Non-Denom
    Married
    US-Others
    Prayer is not an instant fixer like glue. Prayer is a process of long term transformation of thought. The only solution for ANY ideas that you want to diminish is to replace them with new thoughts and responses. As Reese mentioned, this is a long term project. There is no quick-fix solution. It is completely normal for these feelings to persist. So there is no reason to be anxious when they do.
     
  13. A_Thinker

    A_Thinker Well-Known Member Supporter

    +7,424
    Christian
    Married
    Unite with Jesus now ... just as you are ... and let God work everything out later. It takes years/decades for all of us.

    "Come to Me, all of you who struggle with life ... and are burdened down, ... and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart ... and you will find rest for your souls.

    For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light."

    Matthew 11:28-30

    Regarding sex, God says don't have sex with people you're not married to. Concentrate on being faithful to that command. Don't be too concerned with your feelings ... that's for God to work out with/for you.
     
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2021
  14. Benam

    Benam Member Supporter

    97
    +221
    Canada
    Christian
    Married
    We live in a fallen world and every single person since Adam (excluding Jesus) was born with an imperfect biological/chemical/mental makeup. I believe one can definitely be "born that way", and in that sense it's not something you can help. The sin is in acting upon it, however.

    If you understand that participating in homosexual acts is contrary to God's perfect design and therefore sinful, and you strive to avoid it, and feel remorse and genuinely repent when you fail, then you are like any other honest Christian out there. We all struggle with a different sins.

    So I believe that a homosexual can be saved, as can the person who loses their temper too easily, the alcoholic, the drug addict, the thief, the liar, the womanizer ..... really, substitute any sinful tendency.

    The homosexual "Christians" that are unlikely to be saved (in my opinion, but only God truly knows) are those that say there is nothing wrong with it, that God "made them that way", and it's ok for them to participate in that lifestyle. None of that is true.

    God loves everyone, but He does not love everyone "just the way they are". Every single person has to work daily to overcome their sinful nature and be more Christ-like.

    Now, can someone who is homosexual become heterosexual? There are many examples of people who have made that change. Can it happen for you? Certainly, through a lot of prayer and faith anything can happen. Will it? Maybe, maybe not. God's answer to prayer isn't always "yes". It may be that you are meant to remain celibate for reasons God only knows right now.

    It may take years for you to overcome your urges, or they may never go away. But never give up hope. Pray, pray, and pray some more, and have faith that God has a plan for you. And if your prayer doesn't get the answer you want right now, it may come later. God's timing, more often than not, is not our timing.
     
  15. dqhall

    dqhall Well-Known Member Supporter

    +2,794
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    I would recommend celibacy until you might be able to sort things out.
     
  16. Maria Billingsley

    Maria Billingsley Well-Known Member Supporter

    +3,428
    United States
    Christian
    In Relationship
    Welcome. I am sorry to hear about your struggle. Ultimately, your love for our Lord Jesus Christ of Nazareth has to prevail over any ongoing sin in our lives. The conversion is not man made it is through His Holy Spirit. It is taking up the Cross. It is relinquishing the power to Him and not your own or anyone else.
    You say you are not saved yet, I say He has already done the work to save the world from sin. If you love Him, He will not abandon you. Trust in Him fully that He has forgiven you and you will receive His Holy Spirit . Blessings.
     
  17. paul1149

    paul1149 that your faith might rest in the power of God Supporter

    +5,116
    United States
    Christian
    Private
    US-Republican
    You get Saved first, so that the power of Christ can help you overcome sin. Don't wait until you have the victory to come to Christ; without Him it may never happen. If you mean it He will accept your sincere repentance, even if you don't have the manifest victory as yet. Read Romans 7 and 8.
     
  18. chevyontheriver

    chevyontheriver Well-Known Member Supporter

    +10,452
    United States
    Catholic
    Married
    US-American-Solidarity
    Exactly. We don't save ourselves. We realize that we cannot save ourselves and then, moved by grace, we throw ourselves at the mercy of God who can save us. You have put the horse before the cart. Thanks.
     
  19. FreeinChrist

    FreeinChrist CF Advisory team Staff Member Site Advisor Supporter

    +13,211
    United States
    Baptist
    Married
    US-Democrat
    ADVISOR HAT


    This isn't a debate thread, folks.

    Read the Statement of Purpose. ​
     
  20. Marumorose

    Marumorose Member

    198
    +156
    South Africa
    Christian
    Single
    Firstly, Homosexuality is a spiritual thing and not physical. There is no gay gene in our bodies. Homosexuality is not an energy from Heaven OR GOD. It is an energy that attaches itself to the body and blends with our senses. It is easy for the spirit of homosexuality to enter into your body but it is hard to get it out. Understand that we have a soul and that soul is nourished or nurtured by the word of God and songs of praise. The reason you are unable to overcome your homosexuality is because your Soul is weak(meaning it is not nurtured enough) which means the spirit of homosexuality has overpowered your soul. Keep praying and reading the bible and praising him and watching videos about salvation.
    This is a prayer that you can pray
    JESUS, I KNOW THAT YOU ARE THE SON OF GOD
    JESUS, I KNOW THAT YOU DIED ON THE CROSS FOR ME
    I KNOW THAT YOU CAME TO DESTROY THE WORKS OF THE DEVIL
    LORD JESUS I COME TO YOU AND
    ASK YOU TO COME INTO MY HEART
    AND SET ME FREE FROM HOMOSEXUAL BONDAGE
    FORGIVE ME LORD FOR ALL MY SINS
    AND I FORGIVE EVERYONE WHO HAS WRONGED ME
    I ASK FOR FREEDOM AND TAKE YOU AS MY LORD AND SAVIOUR
    AND FILL ME WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT
    AT THIS MOMENT I RENOUNCE EVERYTHING
    THANK YOU GOD FOR HEARING MY PRAYER
    AMEN
     
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