Help

[Jun_Canada]

Im in a somewhat in a confusing situation
Right now in my life, im really trying to get devoted to just getting to know God but ive had the same friends ever since I was a born again believer. And I guess right now......... its just nothing seems to interest me about what they do. Practically like 90% of my guy friends....all they do is talk about hockey....thats all they do.. just talk about hockey. We had this online pool going on, and I guess I ticked them off a little when I said that hockey is not about strategy and blah blah blah. Its not just about the hockey, but most of these friends just gossip,swear,lie,...and basically I dont like that cause im really trying hard to just seek Jesus and I dont need that in my life right now. So what would be your advice? They r still great friends to me but its just I dont want to gossip, lie etc so it just makes me not want to talk to them a lot. What should I do?
God Bless

 

[Ampmonster]

oooof. toughy. i kinda took the reverse route. i got rid of most my friends and then started to walk with Christ. i still hang out with my best friend though. he is completely worldly and doesn't think much about God at all. i dont see him too often so i, personally, can go a night or two a week, BSing and watching sports (hockey's my fav too) and chillin with my old friends.

you'll have to detirmine at what point your friends affect you. i dont let cursing and BSing get to me so im ok. i actually relish the opportunity to share with them about God sometimes(when its appropriate).

 

[drdeancrosby]

Jun it's important to limit your friends to Christians.Non-Christians will slowly tear down your faith directly or indirectly.In reference to hockey for instance,the ten commandments require you to keep the sabbath day holy which will prevent you from even talking hockey let alone watching a game.We all need to frequently chose between God and our friends.

 

[Jun_Canada]

So what do you mean? Every1 around me practically is a non-christian outside of church. Everywhere I go, every1 I talk to in school is non-christian....does it mean not talk to them or?

God Bless
Thank you for all the help!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Lyle]

Change the subject... It'll get easier as you do it. Just start talking about Christ, express your desire to. If they're as great as you say, they'll understand and be more then willing to comply

 

[sparrow1029]

I wanted to let you know that, even though this seems bad, the fact that you're experiencing this gap between you and your friends is a good thing. It means you're growing in your faith, and away from what you used to be.

I had a similar thing happen to me after I became a Christian. I had a friend I'd know since elementary school, and soon after I was saved things started steadily going downhill between us. Every conversation we had became more and more awkward and strained, and pretty soon it was very hard to relate to her. This was totally not her fault--she was the same person she'd always been. But, I was changing, and growing in my faith, and because of this I saw things differently. Eventually, God moved her out of my life (this made me very sad, but I trusted He had some purpose in doing so).

Well, I'm happy to report that God brought her back into my life about three years later, and we've been re-establishing our friendship. I see now His wisdom in moving us apart, because I had a chance to grow stronger in my faith, and He has been using me as a witness to her.

My suggestion to you is, ask for Gods wisdom and guidance in this issue, and be prepared to do what He tells you. This may or may not involve separating yourself from your friends (everyone's situation is different, after all). Carefully guard your faith, and if you feel that your friends are pulling you away from it, run! Your relationship with God should be the most important and precious thing in your life.

 

[eunice]

aw beautifully said, sparrow...Amen!

 

[Godzman]

Jun it's important to limit your friends to Christians.Non-Christians will slowly tear down your faith directly or indirectly.In reference to hockey for instance,the ten commandments require you to keep the sabbath day holy which will prevent you from even talking hockey let alone watching a game.We all need to frequently chose between God and our friends.

drdeancrosby has a point, but do not isolate yourself from the world, seperation and isolation are different.

And I have friends who aren't saved, I would like to think I have influenced them to seek God.

 

[Kelly]

Have you found a church? If not do it right away! Join a small group, men's group or bible study. Surround yourself with those who are in your situation and want to share fellowship with people like yourself.

 

[Rainbow.]

Well your in a tough situations right now, and if your wanting to put Jesus first you will have to make a lot of hard decisions.
When i gave my life to Christ i had to give up most of my friends because of their unchanging lifestyles.
But if your friends are good people who can respect your new way of life, then try to stick with them.However if they do not respect your way of life, and continue to swear and live sinfully in your eyes, then you may have to make a new set of friends.
God bless and good luck. x

 

[Tracie]

Dumping your non-Christian friends is not the way to go. God doesn't want you hanging out with only Christians. Evangelism is a HUGE part of being a Christian and evangelizing Christians is pretty pointless.

Matthew 9:9-12 says: 9As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector's booth. "Follow me," he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him.
10While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew's house, many tax collectors and "sinners" came and ate with him and his disciples. 11When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and 'sinners'?"
12On hearing this, Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. 13But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.'[1] For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners."

Jesus was always hanging out with the worst of the worst. Of course, if you feel that being around these people will make it easier for you to sin, be careful there. Don't just drop them, though. If you do, you may never have the chance to see them come to Christ. You may be the only view of Jesus they have. Dropping them will make them think that because you became a Christian you think you are better than them. They'll think that because they aren't Christians and don't understand you are doing it for your own spiritual growth.

The most important thing to do is pray about it. Ask God to show you what He wants you to do. And pray for your friends!!!!

Tracie

 

[Jun_Canada]

Thats the exact quote that I was thinking about when bringing up this topic.
I know that hanging around with my friends can bring me into sin easier and everytime I think about just separating from them, I think about the Matthew 9 quote but also I think about "Love every1 as you love yourself" or something like that so....i dunno...this is why I asked the board about what to do in this situation.

 

[Jun_Canada]

So.... some people have said that i should not hang out with people that bring down my faith or hinder it.....but then some ppl say dont dump my friends.......????
I dunno what to do....im confused sorry Should I still like hang out with my friends or just talk with them once in a while or just ignore them all together? Because I know the bible says to "love every1" and something like.... i dont know the exact quote but it says something like "its the the righteous that need help but the sinful"...something like that ....so i dont know what to do in my situaton
Any ideas?
God Bless

 

[Kelly]

Don't dump your friends, but meet some new people in your church. Bottom like is you need a base of operations. You need a haven, some where you can go where there are people who share your faith.

 

[pmarquette]

until the new walk becomes part of you ....

limit , balance , walk with witness
do the right thing around them , if they are true
friends they will remain with you , if not they not not you will leave , for they are being convicted by what is now in you ...

 

[Koop]

Jun, I don't think anyone is saying to dump your friends. They are just encouraging you to not let them be your best friends. Jesus indeed spent much time with sinners, but most of his time was spend with his friends (the twelve deciples) It is important to have a close fellowship as it was said "to have a base of operations," and it is also important to reach out to the world around you.

 

[wvmtnkid]

I think you will also find as you find yourself in Christ, your interests change and what you have in common with your old friends change, if they do not become Christians. You will tend to drift away from them and perhaps grow closer to those that share your faith. At least that is what happened to me. I am still friends with some of my non-Christian friends, we just don't have the closeness we once did because there are just some things I can't share with them, because they don't understand. But who knows, the witness of your faith and your life to them, may be what brings them closer to God. I would just pray and ask God to put yourself in the relationships that honor and glorify Him, and He will show you the way.

 

[paul becke]

Further to Tracy's point, Jun, why feel threatened. Sometimes you may find yourself smiling at something you're expected to smile at, and then regret it, but that's a trial like any other. Trying to find the right balance will be painful at times. But don't expect to walk a perfect line and avoid self-reproach. Scrupulous outward observance is easier, but it's certainly no guarantee of the Love upon which the whole of the Law and the Prophets hang, as Christ was at great pains to emphasise.

In time, if you impress them as a human being, which situation your faith should bring about, you will find that they will ask *you* about the faith. It was what I found out in the army. When they'd had a few drinks, it wasn't me that brought up the matter of the Christian faith; it was the lads I was with who did so. The old latin saying, "in vino, veritas", means just that: the matters closest to your heart will surface when a certain amount of alcohol has been downed. Alcoholism, of course, is another matter, and is very injurious to the faith of the afflicted person.

Some of those old friends may be made of potentially stouter Christian material than many conscious Christians. It's not for us to impose our time-table on their conversion to conscious belief in Christ; God will do that in his own good time, should he see fit. What we have to do is be ambassadors, and ambassadors who can see the bigger picture, so that the "Embassy" doesn't remain a remote outpost nobody gives a thought to. Many of the canonised saints were utter desperados prior to their conversion.

As a matter of interest, Jun, about the hockey, were you ever interested in it, or as interested in it as they are? What would you prefer them to talk about, now?

Are you only interested in talking about the faith, now? That would be a shame. The world needs Christians who are able to interact with it on a host of different levels, so that they can be "all things to all men", without succumbing to its values; and through their own trials and sufferings, can advise and encourage others undergoing similar trials.

 

[ForeverChristian]

That's the same thing that I have happening to me. Except for I didn't work for my friend so he is ticked at me. And now he's getting everyone else ticked at me. So what I do is ignore it and find friends that aren't against me and talk to them. That is what helps me, I'm not sure about you.


I hope this helps you, I'll be praying

 

[ForeverChristian]

here's another piece of advice...Even though everyone is non-christian doesn't mean you have no Christian friends. You will always have Christ. If you think that, it will help you alot.