HoodieBunny12

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to. And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me. The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.
 

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This is kind of an odd posting. You throw this up without giving us any background on yourself and your spiritual journey. That makes it kind of hard to help you.

Were you born into a Christian family, or are you a convert to the Christian faith? What brand of Christian faith do you belong to? Some of them are pretty high on slamming you with the guilt trip.

What is Christianity to you? You make a statement about it being about guilt, but that's not the Good News that Christ offered. What He offers is unlimited forgiveness as you strive to become holy. For many of us, it has taken a lifetime to make even one step towards that goal. Most Christians will finish their holiness in the next life.

Have you ever seen God as your loving heavenly Father? Can you see Him not as condemning, but wanting the best for you? Can you see Him as a Father saying "Don't do that." not because it is wrong, (which it may be) but because He wants the best for you and you are settling for something else.

Why did God not want me to be a inappropriate contentography addict as I was for over 30 years? Just because He was mad that I did the things I did? No, because He realized what I found out the hard way - that inappropriate contentography creates in men an inability to really love another person such as your wife, and to give yourself sacrificially to your wife. God wanted the best for me. I settled for trash when I could have had filet mignon. I never learned how to really love another nor how to receive love, and I missed out on so much by settling for the stupidity of inappropriate contentography.

Our goal is to have union with Jesus Christ and experience His peace and love, not to beat ourselves up over our failures. If that is how you feel, it is no wonder you are having thoughts of atheism just to get away from the guilt that is crippling you. You need to look to God as loving Father, always ready to forgive your failures, but more than that, as wanting the best for you and ready to work with you to achieve that.

I hope that is a bit helpful.
 
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dzheremi

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Homosexuality is punishment for sinners? Huh. I've never heard that one. Who told you that?

And as far as masturbation or anything like that goes (same goes for overeating, neglecting prayer, etc.), the problem is that we are supposed to struggle against the passions, not give into them. It's certainly much easier said than done (one of the many reasons to take St. Paul's advice that it is better to be married than to burn with passion), but then so is everything. You're not going to escape that by leaving Christianity. Life will still be full of things that are hard to do but still must be done for various reasons.

I find it very interesting that Christianity in your view is all about a mechanism of control of the person, when internally it teaches the control over external forces (e.g., the passions and lusts of the world). I think it was St. Augustine of Hippo in his City of God who made the point that a slave may be comparatively more free than his rich master if the master is more bound by what controls him. This is even more laid bare in the passion of Christ, in which He most definitely suffered and died but throughout which nothing controlled Him. As He Himself said of His life "I lay it down of my own accord; no one takes it from me."

This is what it is really all about: that we are freed of the control that the world would put on us anyway, regardless of whether we call ourselves Christians or not. Christians are just in theory supposed to be better at recognizing it and fighting against it, through fasting, prayer, self-denial, etc.

Anyway, just some thoughts. May God bless you and guide you no matter where you go.
 
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Long Island Pilgrim

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Hi Hoodie,

Theres a great book called "knowing God" by J I packer . It's really a great source of reference to get acquainted with the God of the Bible and to know how truly loving and compassionate he really is. Once you have developed a personal relationship and consistent fellowship with him you won't feel the way you described. Sometimes people know about God because they were raised in a Christian home but they never developed a personal relationship .

May God draw you closer.
 
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salt-n-light

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to. And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me. The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.

So you're planning to leave God over sexual activities? Over things that happen for 15-30 mins, probably 5 for masturbating, a fleeting activity, you're willing to gamble your soul over?

Ok, you're free to make a choice, but there is nothing out there. Been there done that.
 
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ToBeLoved

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to. And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me. The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.
Even if masturbation is a sin. We all ask for forgiveness from our sin.

God doesn’t expect perfection
 
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Acts2:38

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to. And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me. The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.

Have you read the bible? And I don't mean just a little here and a little there. I mean, have you read it?

Also, if you read the bible, you would see that actions of homosexuality are sinful. You called it "bs" to you, but the world doesn't revolve around your thoughts, but God's and what He wishes for us to do. So you know enough about the bible to know that homosexuality is a sin I assume.

Wonderful thing about God is that He didn't want robots worshiping Him. He gave us free will/ choice. So your free to do what you wish, but when "that day" comes, you will "reap what you sow". We all will.

Another thing to mention is that its not the Christians telling you its wrong, its the bible that the Christians follow, the gospel, the word of God.

So your problem is not with the people that follow Christ, its with Christ Himself is who you have a problem with.

I'm not trying to bash on you, just showing what I see from where I stand.
 
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redleghunter

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to. And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me. The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.
HB, prayers for you.

Have you discussed this with your church ministry team?
 
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Stormy

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Op is giving up on God cause he can't get off the way he desires.

You have slim to no faith. Read Job.

And yes, I am highly unsympathetic cause God chose to take two of my beautiful children and totally break my heart... And yet I believe. When you truly believe you have no choice other than to hang on.

Op You do know that yes you can decide .. I'm not going to have faith in God cause I want to do what I want! But, your decision does not make God any less real and the Bible any less true. Think about it

If you were looking for a cuddle read the other posts
 
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Johnny4ChristJesus

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to. And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me. The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.

My only advice would be "get to know God." It sounds as if your belief was superficial and superficial life just doesn't keep you when the trials, tribulation and temptation come. The God of the Bible promises in numerous places that if you diligently seek Him, you will find Him. He even says that without faith it is impossible to please Him and then He defines faith as "knowing that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him." When I diligently sought Him--even without believing in the whole "born again" thing at the time--He found me! When He found me, I became His. I've gone through a lot and there is never a shadow of turning away from Him, because of any of those trials I have had to endure. It is a beautiful place to be "knowing Him". It is a game-changer for many reasons, one of which is that nobody can take that away from you. Someone can tell me that I don't know God and I can simply laugh, because I know that I do, by His choice! He woke me up when I didn't even think He did such a thing! I will also tell you that not everything the world says is normal is normal in God's sight. And, not everything you hear coming out of people that profess to be Christians is correct in God's sight. You have to hear from Him. With regard to your "feeling guilty," one of the tricks of the devil is to tempt you to do something and then turn around and accuse you, so you feel guilty. I don't know what all you are doing; but as a lover of God, I am not convinced that masturbation is a sin. If you are doing it to pictures of people or images of people in your head that's a problem (lust); but, if not, I don't believe the act of masturbation violates either of the great commandments.

I hope that helps you some. God is real. Don't make the mistake of throwing Him out of your life; Instead, find a way to really get Him to overtake you. If He does, you'll know. He says in Scripture that His Spirit testifies to our spirit that we are children of God. You can't imagine how wonderful that is to have that confirmation! Seek it. He's worth it.
 
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Praying for you; ultimately, it's God's choice for when He bestows upon you the gift of faith.

Be ready to say "Yes!" to the real God, not the bizarre perversions of Him that you've sadly come to believe.

Know that there are many branches of Christianity, most of which are more healthy than the one that you've come to know.

God be with you.
 
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Sketcher

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to.
No, Jesus Christ is the centerpiece.

And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me.
Where did you get that idea?

The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.
I'm not seeing that when I examine it, being as the New Testament doesn't have a criminal code.
 
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aiki

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I feel like Christianity is all about self hate since when ever I do normal activities like touch or anything I feel really guilty because God told me not to.

Has God told you not to touch? How did He do that, exactly?

And homosexuality is supposedly a "punishment for sinners" which is b.s. to me.

Well, homosexual behaviour God will judge and punish. Call it b.s. all you like, but doing so won't change God's judgment of this evil sexuality.

The more I think about it the more it feels like Christianity is like an agenda for order and control.

Well, God certainly has the right to say what goes on in His universe and He has the power to insist on it.
 
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