Guilt (cheating)

[names_are_useless]

Hello everyone,

Yesterday I finished one of my exams. After I finished, my teacher for the class asked if I could talk to him and I agreed to. He then started to accuse me of cheating on one of the homeworks, which I did

He talked to me for about 2 hours, and not thinking straight from lack of sleep and severe stress, I went lying my mouth off. I'm sure he figured out I was lying, as I couldn't explain my answers thoroughly. I then thought I knew what was coming: being expelled. I had broken the schools lying/cheating principles, and I had no real excuse.

But then the unexpected happened. After 2 hours of me and my big fat lying mouth, he let me off with only a warning and a cold hard stare. Not even a reduction in my grade, just a warning. I even asked that he should just reduce my grade on the assignment, and yet he didn't even do that! Why only a warning I am completely clueless. I can't believe his generosity after the way I acted! And yet, the guilt is really starting to get to me.

I want to tell him the truth, but he's given me this gift of only a warning. Would it be wrong for me not to just accept this gift? I've asked for forgiveness from God and what He thinks I should do, but I feel as though I've turned my back too much on Him to ever give me an answer

I can't even look into the teacher's eyes, and I'm sure I'll probably have to talk to him again. I feel like he'll never forgive me after the stupid way I acted. The way I acted yesterday: I've never acted this stupid in my life! What I did was just not me, and yet I'm sure everytime I walk down the hallway that that'll be the only way he thinks of me.

I'm at a point I just don't know what to do. I've learned my lesson and I know I'll never do such a stupid thing as I did. Is that really enough though?

I guess my only real concerns is being expelled if I went out and admitted it (even if I'm almost 100% sure he knows I lied), even if he gave me just a warning. I've spent almost 4 years staying truthful until now, and to lose what I'm so close to getting (a diploma) is just so hard for me to grasp. It almost seems selfish in fact, as without this degree I won't be able to support my (hopefully) future fiance. I feel sure enough that God has called me to be alongside her for the rest of my life. To lose that support to provide for her that God has called me for makes me feel as if I'd lose the only true purpose with life that I know.

If you have any advice, let me know.

 

[Bellicus]

Not sure what I would have done. I would probably have just not cheated anymore, but I would also feel like telling that I did in fact cheat. You should follow what your hearth says, what God is telling you to do.

 

[rowrow]

In the end you will probably feel much better if you go to the teacher, tell him the truth, apologize, take the consequences and move on. Otherwise you will forever have this in the back of your mind. Tell God you are sorry, he will forgive you, and move on to grow so this sin will not happen again.

Good Luck, easier said than done I know.

 

[names_are_useless]

Not sure what I would have done. I would probably have just not cheated anymore, but I would also feel like telling that I did in fact cheat. You should follow what your hearth says, what God is telling you to do.

Like I said, I don't even know what God is trying to tell me anymore (if he is at all). My heart is telling me two things: I should to get rid of the guilt and hopefully earn what little respect the teacher has for me, or I should accept the gift and use what I've learned for the rest of my life. Could the warning simply have been a gift from God? I almost feel like I'd be trashing it if the teacher would go back on his warning if I went to talk to him. Whether I tell the teacher or not, I doubt I'll ever get any respect from him ever again

Good Luck, easier said than done I know.

You're right about that. I may just be making excuses for myself, or I could be putting myself on a guilt-trip for something I can't fix. The professor knows about the lying I'm sure, and he may just be waiting for an honest apology so that he'll be allowed to kick me out of the school.


I'd also like to mention that I'm leaving for home tomorrow. I don't think I'll even be able to tell him the truth before the semester is out, even if I decide to. I'm afraid of having to live with this guilt that I may not be able to get rid of (the teacher may not be coming back to this school next semester). Even if he does return, I don't know how to get the strength to tell him

 

[rowrow]

I don't know what to tell you. On one hand honesty is the best policy even when it is hard to tell the truth and there are rewards to being dishonest. When I run into a dilemma I think it out like a puzzle i.e. I go down a list of all the ramifications of the actions, what does God want me to do? What does I say about me when I choose my way over him? What are the ramifications of doing wrong? How will I feel if I choose wrong ect...and then I slowly answer them all.

On the other hand, part of me says if this is not a pattern, then maybe you just grow and never do it again, though I am sure that is not a theologically sound argument. Maybe the fear and experience will be enough to ensure that you never cheat again, and that is what you are supposed to learn from this.

Not sure.

 

[names_are_useless]

I don't know what to tell you. On one hand honesty is the best policy even when it is hard to tell the truth and there are rewards to being dishonest. When I run into a dilemma I think it out like a puzzle i.e. I go down a list of all the ramifications of the actions, what does God want me to do? What does I say about me when I choose my way over him? What are the ramifications of doing wrong? How will I feel if I choose wrong ect...and then I slowly answer them all.

On the other hand, part of me says if this is not a pattern, then maybe you just grow and never do it again, though I am sure that is not a theologically sound argument. Maybe the fear and experience will be enough to ensure that you never cheat again, and that is what you are supposed to learn from this.

Not sure.

As untheological and dishonest as it might sound, I think I'm going to let this guilt to rest and just not talk to my professor about it. Hes given me the warning, and from all this I know what I will do right next semester. I've asked my parents, and they both agree that I've been given a gift from God that I've learned so much from. I'm getting a tutor for my hardest class next semester, I'm gonna see my teachers more, etc. I'm going to use this extra chance I've been given to be the ethical academic student that I should always be. I can honestly say I'm feeling A LOT better now . It'll probably still take some time for this whole situation to get out of my head.

Its worth noting that I've been taking extra ritalin this exam week, and I tend to stress over every little small thing when I'm taking the day AND night dosage for a whole week. I believe that sometimes we only guilt ourselves and make things worse.

And I don't think I'll ever resolve what my teacher thinks about me. I didn't want to lie to him at the time, and I wasn't think straight, and thats that. Hey, he may not even be so mad about it next semester (4 weeks off ). He obviously gave me a second chance for a reason: he must somehow trust that I'll improve.

Thank you all for giving your opinions. I'm so happy to see like-minded Christians actually caring and talking to others. I can only pray to God and ask that he forgives me of all the problems I've done. I should be putting Him first and foremost, and not get so involved with my schoolwork as I've done.

 

[DreamsAreFree]

Are you sorry you cheated or just sorry you got caught? If you've learned your lesson, you could let it go. If it was a first time offense the teacher might think you have learned that you can't get away with it and it might not happen again. If it happens again I don't think you'll get off so lightly. Time to start to learn your own work. The consequences are much more serious in college.

 

[X=?]

Put it down as a learning curve for future and move on

 

[MikePantelides]

I can sense that you don't want to have a confrontation with the teacher, in one way you have learnt your lesson and i'm guessing you won't do it again. If you want you can email him or write him an apology but then he has proof to show people at your place of study to get you kicked off (I doubt he'd be that extreme). He might admire you for apologising, he may have been annoyed because you were dishonest and he could tell. Either way it's your call.

 

[names_are_useless]

Are you sorry you cheated or just sorry you got caught? If you've learned your lesson, you could let it go. If it was a first time offense the teacher might think you have learned that you can't get away with it and it might not happen again. If it happens again I don't think you'll get off so lightly. Time to start to learn your own work. The consequences are much more serious in college.

Sorry that I cheated. And you're right, I need to learn my own work. If I have questions, I'm asking my teachers next time around instead of the Internet.

I can sense that you don't want to have a confrontation with the teacher, in one way you have learnt your lesson and i'm guessing you won't do it again. If you want you can email him or write him an apology but then he has proof to show people at your place of study to get you kicked off (I doubt he'd be that extreme). He might admire you for apologising, he may have been annoyed because you were dishonest and he could tell. Either way it's your call.

I really don't want to confront him. He is a teacher I greatly admired, and I let him down BIG TIME. And I would write him an apology, but like you said, he could just use it as evidence against me. It might be that that's what he was looking for in the first place: an open apology from me as evidence to kick me out. Honestly I'm not sure. All I know is that I'm still in this school, and I have a plan of action for my final semester that I don't think I would have followed had this event not happened.

But either way, I feel SO much better today. Even though I haven't finished my final project before leaving school, I have the satisfaction of knowing that I didn't have to cheat with what I've got done, and that's whats really important here . I feel like now I'll be able to rest easy without this burden on my heart.

 

[Prizm]

I really don't want to confront him. He is a teacher I greatly admired, and I let him down BIG TIME.

One thing I've learned is always do the right thing even though there may be consequences. In the end, right will turn out right. Fearing that your teacher may use your apology as an excuse to punish you is no reason not to apologize. You still need to do the right thing and bear the consequences if necessary.

God wants us to be honest and righteous people. You may have asked God for forgiveness, but that doesn't solve the issue with your teacher. You know in your heart that he needs an apology from you. The fact that you admire him makes it even more so. I believe he'd really appreciate an apology, and will respect you more for it.
I don't know the teacher, but if it were me I would personally appreciate an honest apology and would still let the situation slide, knowing that you had the guts to tell me. Regardless of whether you get punished, your teacher can only think higher of you for coming clean with him. I'm sure you can find a way to get in touch with him.

"Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart" Galatians 6:9

 

[names_are_useless]

One thing I've learned is always do the right thing even though there may be consequences. In the end, right will turn out right. Fearing that your teacher may use your apology as an excuse to punish you is no reason not to apologize. You still need to do the right thing and bear the consequences if necessary.

God wants us to be honest and righteous people. You may have asked God for forgiveness, but that doesn't solve the issue with your teacher. You know in your heart that he needs an apology from you. The fact that you admire him makes it even more so. I believe he'd really appreciate an apology, and will respect you more for it.
I don't know the teacher, but if it were me I would personally appreciate an honest apology and would still let the situation slide, knowing that you had the guts to tell me. Regardless of whether you get punished, your teacher can only think higher of you for coming clean with him. I'm sure you can find a way to get in touch with him.

"Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart" Galatians 6:9

Yes I know that God wants us to be honest, but like I've said I've talked to both my mom and dad in detail (and yes, both are Christians) about this and they both told me I shouldn't try and make this situation possibly any worse and just leave the situation as it is. I guess its between honesty and honoring my parents.

I have a feeling whether I tell the teacher or not, this guilt won't go away for awhile. As long as I know that God is always there, there is always hope for everyone , and that's a very comforting feeling

 

[bsd13]

Looking back to when I was in school I know what I would have done then. Lied and bragged because I was "so much smarter" than the teacher. If I were to go back there as the person I am now I'd still be tempted to lie, but ultimately I would come clean.

 

[wonderwaleye]

Hello everyone,

Yesterday I finished one of my exams. After I finished, my teacher for the class asked if I could talk to him and I agreed to. He then started to accuse me of cheating on one of the homeworks, which I did

He talked to me for about 2 hours, and not thinking straight from lack of sleep and severe stress, I went lying my mouth off. I'm sure he figured out I was lying, as I couldn't explain my answers thoroughly. I then thought I knew what was coming: being expelled. I had broken the schools lying/cheating principles, and I had no real excuse.

But then the unexpected happened. After 2 hours of me and my big fat lying mouth, he let me off with only a warning and a cold hard stare. Not even a reduction in my grade, just a warning. I even asked that he should just reduce my grade on the assignment, and yet he didn't even do that! Why only a warning I am completely clueless. I can't believe his generosity after the way I acted! And yet, the guilt is really starting to get to me.

I want to tell him the truth, but he's given me this gift of only a warning. Would it be wrong for me not to just accept this gift? I've asked for forgiveness from God and what He thinks I should do, but I feel as though I've turned my back too much on Him to ever give me an answer

I can't even look into the teacher's eyes, and I'm sure I'll probably have to talk to him again. I feel like he'll never forgive me after the stupid way I acted. The way I acted yesterday: I've never acted this stupid in my life! What I did was just not me, and yet I'm sure everytime I walk down the hallway that that'll be the only way he thinks of me.

I'm at a point I just don't know what to do. I've learned my lesson and I know I'll never do such a stupid thing as I did. Is that really enough though?

I guess my only real concerns is being expelled if I went out and admitted it (even if I'm almost 100% sure he knows I lied), even if he gave me just a warning. I've spent almost 4 years staying truthful until now, and to lose what I'm so close to getting (a diploma) is just so hard for me to grasp. It almost seems selfish in fact, as without this degree I won't be able to support my (hopefully) future fiance. I feel sure enough that God has called me to be alongside her for the rest of my life. To lose that support to provide for her that God has called me for makes me feel as if I'd lose the only true purpose with life that I know.

If you have any advice, let me know.

By now I'm sure you have taken many tests at school and done well.



Now you are facing GOD'S test of your FAITH in HIM and HIS WORD. I WONDER IF YOU WILL PASS?






ALWAYS REMEMBER:

JESUS IS RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE AT!!! EVEN THOUGH YOU DON'T SEE HIM!!!

( left click and hold over the above to see your personal message )

 

[capnator]

Zacchaeus was a good example of a cheater, what did he do when he repented?

 

[Prizm]

By now I'm sure you have taken many tests at school and done well.


Now you are facing GOD'S test of your FAITH in HIM and HIS WORD. I WONDER IF YOU WILL PASS?

Wonderwaleye makes a good point.

 

[kellyc]

as a christian, you must admit that you have sinned and ask for forgiveness. whatever the consequences are, you have earned them. i would not be surprised if the teacher is merciful and gives you another chance, although your concern that he would use your apology as 'evidence against' you tells me that you are willing to lie and accept the grade you did not earn.

 

[Vloggle]

Hello, "names_are_useless"


How is everything going with your decision not to tell your teacher?


Thank you so much
God Bless