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Guidance Needed Please - Evangelist Sister Shunning Brother

Discussion in 'Struggles by Non-Christians' started by FlowerMoon, Mar 17, 2021.

  1. FlowerMoon

    FlowerMoon New Member

    United States
    In Relationship
    Nice to meet everyone :)

    I am writing to understand my partner's situation with his family.

    I come from an ancient civilization that honours the earth and the cycle of the seasons. One of the main things I heard growing up was - everyone is equal and everyone deserves respect. I feel a deep contentment. I work as a trauma therapist to help others. I do not fear death. Of course, I've had my struggles, too.

    My partner is a loving man who was raised in a strict Catholic family. He is super kind-hearted and generous, and also works in the healing profession. He believes in the principles of Christ but no longer identifies as Christian. His path for many years is similar to mine - love, nature, gratitude, meditation, personal inner work, and doing work to be in service to others.

    My partner's sister and her husband are Evangelist Christians. My partner adores his sister, and he was very close to her. He fully accepts her path. However, last year she told him that until he believes in the Triune God she cannot talk to him. She has refused to talk to him for months now and he is devastated.

    I understand my partner's sister loves him and wants to save him. However, that's her perspective. My partner is a very good person, and to be honest...he is a lot more in service to people and non-judgemental than maybe how his sister lives. In my life I don't receive condemnation from anyone.

    Any guidance would be welcomed beautiful humans :) Thank you and love :)
  2. Tolworth John

    Tolworth John Well-Known Member Supporter

    United Kingdom
    As far as evangelical Christian theology goes the only people a Christian should shun are Christian who are living an openly sinful life and who refuse to change.

    Her responsibility to her brother is to live a christ like life and to talk to him.

    Her actions are not loving and certainly not Christian.
  3. Jeshu

    Jeshu Bought by His Blood Supporter

    It is terrible when self righteousness clouds our judgement and we destroy the relationships even with the very people we love. i would pray for your sister in law that Jesus would open her eyes to show her that even an imperfectly demonstrating of the love of Christ works far better to convince someone of their wrongs than being judgemental.

    Jesus demonstrate us not to judge and not to condemn others for very good reasons, for the very people who did judge and condemn He judged with their own judgement. How much clearer can the Word be telling us to refrain from judging but to love sin out of people?

    Welcome to C.F i hope you will find this a good place to find answers.
  4. AK1982

    AK1982 All things ... through HIM who strengthens!

    Ultimatums are a poor approach. Love and grace was Christ's example.

    The way she presented the "urgency" of knowing the truth might be wrong, but it does not rule out the fact that - what she says is truth and deserves attention.

    One needs to believe in Jesus Christ in order to be saved & the kingdom of heaven has come near.
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2021
  5. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

    Does the sister know that? Or does she think he's a Christian?
  6. Maria Billingsley

    Maria Billingsley Well-Known Member Supporter

    United States
    In Relationship
    Welcome ! I am truly sorry to hear this. So many times Christians think they are not allowed to associate with those who are not Christian or have fallen away. Truth be told, Christ mainly hung out with sinners in order to witness about the Kingdom of God. It is foolish and frankly unloving to cut off family because they are going through a separation. Her actions are not a reflection of the" Good News" but rather a self righteous act.
    That being said, weak Christians lack the capacity to love unconditionally. Love is just not a word it is all action. Shunning is a sin and very unloving. There is really nothing you can do for her as it takes the power of prayer to overcome a harded heart. Be blessed.
  7. Maria Billingsley

    Maria Billingsley Well-Known Member Supporter

    United States
    In Relationship
    Cont... adding to my comment .
    There is one thing you may consider. Did you pull him away from Catholicism?
    A strict Catholic upbringing has many, many rules. The work of the Holy Spirit is often clouded by dogma. Sometimes we need to understand the "other side" in order to address the situation.
  8. kvolm

    kvolm New Member

    United States
    Welcome and glad you are here! It is so unfortunate to hear that his sister is acting in such an unloving = UN Christ-like manner toward him. Since she has chosen to move away from their relationship, maybe now would be a good time for your partner to invest the time in exploring why he is "devastated" by her actions. Of course we all want to have good family relationships but is there something that your partner needs to consider about why a relationship with her matters so much to him when she is not going to contribute to his life in a healthy way? Hope that makes sense!
  9. 1watchman

    1watchman Overseer Supporter

    Yes, as was pointed out here by several ones, carnal and flesh-pleasing 'professing' Christians make a mockery of the Bible. God is showing His beloved Son there --the Lord Jesus as our only salvation (such as John 3; John 14; Romans 8; etc.); and we MUST have the Lord Jesus as our Savior and lord of our life to have any part in our Creator-God. God loves His children and Satan hates them. We need to decide who we will look to. Let us read our Bible daily and learn to walk and talk with the Lord Jesus (1 Jn. 5:10-12).
  10. Hazelelponi

    Hazelelponi Well-Known Member Supporter

    United States
    I'm in full agreement with @Tolworth John on this issue. It sounds to me more like your partners sister has found herself in the middle of a cult, not a Christian church.

    Cutting ties according to scripture, has a specific people in mind to cut ties with - people who profess the faith falsely. The command not to eat with such a one is a specific command not to partake in communion with them, and also to expell them from the church and other associations.

    I have many freinds from many different walks of life and many different belief systems. I just pray the person I am in Christ leads them to look twice at the work of Christ for our salvation - as it should...

    If she refuses to speak with him there is little to be done, but I do find the mindset of her quite concerning... as it's a misunderstanding of Scripture itself.