Godly Sorrow and OCD

[333GRACE]

I was diagnosed with Scrupulosity OCD eight years ago after a terrible bout of depression and anxiety over past sin. I am now facing a similar battle, only this time I am being tormented regarding the fact that I only have Worldly Sorrow and not Godly Sorrow. I have confessed many things to God but I don't know if I have Godly Sorrow. The sins I speak of are not known publicly but I have felt conviction (I think) over them and am feeling the need to confess to others. However, I am at a point where I am beginning to think that the sorrow I feel is not unto salvation but death as Paul states in II Corinthians. It is as if I cannot properly repent and feel TRUE Godly sorrow for my sin. This is crippling my life. I have cried out to God but I feel as if I am only sorry that I "got caught" in my conscience and not sorry that I sinned against God. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Tolworth John]

I was diagnosed with Scrupulosity OCD eight years ago after a terrible bout of depression and anxiety over past sin. I am now facing a similar battle, only this time I am being tormented regarding the fact that I only have Worldly Sorrow and not Godly Sorrow. I have confessed many things to God but I don't know if I have Godly Sorrow. The sins I speak of are not known publicly but I have felt conviction (I think) over them and am feeling the need to confess to others. However, I am at a point where I am beginning to think that the sorrow I feel is not unto salvation but death as Paul states in II Corinthians. It is as if I cannot properly repent and feel TRUE Godly sorrow for my sin. This is crippling my life. I have cried out to God but I feel as if I am only sorry that I "got caught" in my conscience and not sorry that I sinned against God. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

There are two things to deal with here, your OCD and repentance.

OCD:- do you have a therapist or councellor to whom you can talk.
Managing OCD is not just a case of popping pills, but frequently of talking and doing therapy that enables you to 'control' is too strong and 'manage' to weak, keep your OCD bearable.
Please do see a coumcellor.

Repentance.
1john1:9 God is faithfull and will forgive us our sins and purify us from All unrightousness.

If you have told God abouit your sins then you do not need to do so again, rather when your OCD tells you you need to repent of those sins just thank God that he has forgiven you these sins and has cast them as far as the east is from the west.
The only record of them is in your OCD.
So thank God that his forgiveness is so comprehensive, so vat, so all covering.

 

[Sabertooth]

Satan: It's time to launch my final, most vicious attack. I'll remind the saints of their past- how they were liars, cheaters, manipulators and moochers...
Demon: But sir, you know what will happen if you remind the saints of their past.
Satan: And what is that?
Demon: Sir, they'll just remind you of your future.
Satan: NOOOOOOO...!!!

from Carman's Revival in the Land (1989)

 

[333GRACE]

Thanks Tolworth John. I unfortunately cannot afford a counselor and I know that would really help. I don't really have anyone to talk to about it.

I have told God about all of it...several times. I just need to accept that He has forgiven all of it. Thanks for the encouragement.

 

[fwGod]

Your anxiety, anguish, sadness over past sin is godly sorrow. It's called godly sorrow because your God-designed conscience that determines right and wrong is properly working to result in conviction concerning wrongdoings.

Worldly sorrow that brings death is sadness of life yet no turning to God in repentance toward Him.

You say that you have confessed many things to God, therefore you have expressed godly sorrow.

I think that you might think that if you don't blubber enough like a baby.. then you haven't had godly sorrow.

Godly sorrow is thinking.. "Oh I really goofed up on that one." or "Oops, that was a mistake." or "Darn, I shouldn't have done that."

Conviction is all about you catching yourself. Your conscience is supposed to catch you. So yes, you took the next step and confessed your wrongdoings.

But you also need to rely on Jesus to cleanse you of all unrighteousness
1 John 8-10, 2:1
8 If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
10 If we say we have not sinned, we make Him out to be a liar, and His word is not in us.
1 John 2:1
1 "My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate before the Father— Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.
2 He Himself is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world."

Paul said in 2Cor.7:10
"Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation without regret, but worldly sorrow brings death."

What the apostle is talking about is that you qualify because it proves that you're not a narcissistic sociopath, or one who has a hardheart or rebellious nature.

Don't let the devil judge your sorrow against you by telling you that it's worldly. You've got the anxiety, anguish and sadness to prove that you have plenty of sorrow so just tell the devil to quit messing with you and go away.

Fight the good fight of faith according to what James said in chapter 4:7
"Submit yourself to God, resist the devil and he will flee."

 

[fwGod]

(Oops, double post)

Just so it's not a total waste of post..

Mat.5:5 "Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth."

 

[333GRACE]

Thank you fwGod. I am often plagued by thoughts that I am like King Saul or Judas instead of being like David. I have prayed Psalm 51 with all my heart several times to try to "prove" my sincerity.

I certainly have anguish and anxiety--which to your point means I am not as hardhearted as the evil one tells me I am.

Thank you for your insight.

 

[Mari17]

I was diagnosed with Scrupulosity OCD eight years ago after a terrible bout of depression and anxiety over past sin. I am now facing a similar battle, only this time I am being tormented regarding the fact that I only have Worldly Sorrow and not Godly Sorrow. I have confessed many things to God but I don't know if I have Godly Sorrow. The sins I speak of are not known publicly but I have felt conviction (I think) over them and am feeling the need to confess to others. However, I am at a point where I am beginning to think that the sorrow I feel is not unto salvation but death as Paul states in II Corinthians. It is as if I cannot properly repent and feel TRUE Godly sorrow for my sin. This is crippling my life. I have cried out to God but I feel as if I am only sorry that I "got caught" in my conscience and not sorry that I sinned against God. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Sorry to hear you're struggling with scrupulosity! It's a tough battle. Even though you can't see a therapist right now, there is much you can do to learn about OCD/scrupulosity and strategies that you can put into practice. Do you have some good resources for that? If not, I can suggest some.

 

[Undeserving but loved]

I cannot repent! | Know I'm Saved
Listen to this I had the same problem and this set me free

 

[333GRACE]

Sorry to hear you're struggling with scrupulosity! It's a tough battle. Even though you can't see a therapist right now, there is much you can do to learn about OCD/scrupulosity and strategies that you can put into practice. Do you have some good resources for that? If not, I can suggest some.

Thanks Mari17. I have read countless blogs, books, websites, etc. regarding Scrupulosity. However, if you have suggestions I will gladly take them. I could really use some relief from this agony.

 

[Mari17]

Thanks Mari17. I have read countless blogs, books, websites, etc. regarding Scrupulosity. However, if you have suggestions I will gladly take them. I could really use some relief from this agony.

I know, it's a tough battle! It's all about learning to identify our obsessions and compulsions, and then stop reacting to the obsessions by refusing to do our compulsions (even mental ones like ruminating!). I'll post links to some of my favorite resources below:
OCD & CHRISTIANITY – CHRISTIANITY
https://www.ocdonline.com/
The Truth about OCD | Center for Biblical Counseling & Discipleship (I don't agree that OCD is a sin in and of itself, but I believe it can lead to the detrimental behaviors of focusing on ourselves, not trusting God, etc.)
“The Noise in Your Head” – Stop Worrying
Welcome
Christianity and Anxiety Disorders - Let's Talk I'm a member/moderator of this group, and I think it's a pretty good support group for OCD.

 

[333GRACE]

I know, it's a tough battle! It's all about learning to identify our obsessions and compulsions, and then stop reacting to the obsessions by refusing to do our compulsions (even mental ones like ruminating!). I'll post links to some of my favorite resources below:
OCD & CHRISTIANITY – CHRISTIANITY
https://www.ocdonline.com/
The Truth about OCD | Center for Biblical Counseling & Discipleship (I don't agree that OCD is a sin in and of itself, but I believe it can lead to the detrimental behaviors of focusing on ourselves, not trusting God, etc.)
“The Noise in Your Head” – Stop Worrying
Welcome
Christianity and Anxiety Disorders - Let's Talk I'm a member/moderator of this group, and I think it's a pretty good support group for OCD.

Thanks Mari. I requested to join the group. Looking forward to the support.

 

[Mari17]

Thanks Mari. I requested to join the group. Looking forward to the support.

OK, great! We approved the most recent members of the group today, so you should be added!