Give "Bad" Advice (3)

[LaSorcia]

What's the best way to get out of here?

Just keep spamming that same question, and I'll ban you.

How much video gaming is too much?

 

[Tom 1]

You need to get empirical. Clearly the only way to answer your important Q is to play until you experience an existential crisis, then climb a mountain to find a flower growing in the snow. Send us a post card with the answer.

I keep stepping on stuff by accident.

 

[mama2one]

step on stuff on purpose so won't hurt as much then
well except maybe your kid's Legos




need help with something for next 60 days

 

[Sam91]

Hire me! I work hard and am great at organisation and developing efficient strategies.

Who to replace me while I'm off helping my new boss?

 

[Tom 1]

Mary is available. They may want to keep her however, she is highly efficient.

My self-peeling bananas may have become sentient...

 

[Chesterton]

You must began treating them as you treat all other sentient beings. Ignore them.

How can I get this song out of my head?

 

[fwGod]

Stand near a screaming fire siren.

How can I stop burping?

 

[public hermit]

Beer will fix it every time.

I need a hammer, two tortilla chips, and an axiom, quick.

 

[LaSorcia]

No axioms! Weapons are not allowed in the Rec Room!

How can I fight violence without using violence?

 

[Tom 1]

Easy:

How do I get my old dog to be friends with my new dog?

 

[fwGod]

Spray beef scent on the new dog. It will encourage the old dog to be friendly.

How do I get rid of a mole in my yard?

 

[LaSorcia]

Report them to the FBI.

I've been accused of being a fifth columnist due to my strange taste in architecture. How can I refute these accusations?

 

[Quid est Veritas?]

Explain that the architectural dialectic demands that the means of support be born by the foundation; that the columns need to be liquidated as merely parasitising on the strength of that foundation; so that the glorious Architecture free of artificial classes of structure can be realised. Where the bourgeois requirements of physics give way to pure form. Where all is holistically foundation and roof, from each according to its strength to each according to its needs.

How can I convince someone I am not secretly informing on their lack of idealogical purity?

 

[LaSorcia]

You have to practice saying everything as if you were lying. Then, when you actually lie, people will just assume that's your normal mannerism and that you're actually telling the truth.


Who is the true Scotsman?

 

[( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)]

down that whole bottle of tanqueray gin in the least amount of time possible and the judges will decide.


i want to fly

 

[Rhapsody]

Be intentional about practicing every day for now

Where to buy a new camera?

 

[Chesterton]

Check with the CIA or DARPA. They have the best. They have cameras so sophisticated that they haven't even been invented yet (wink wink).

How can I get rich quick?

 

[public hermit]

Give up all desire.

What's the best way to convince someone to be civil?

 

[Rhapsody]

Don't give them any real life examples

How do you know when a potato is cooked in the middle?

 

[public hermit]

Ten minutes in the oven and you should be good.

What's the best investment right now?