Give "Bad" Advice (3)

mama2one

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listen to news with your plane ready and extra invitations
some blow away with kids in them so pick one up




keeps snowing and cold so where's spring
should Puxatany Phil be replaced?
 
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LaSorcia

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Sure, my cat's looking for a new job and likes the heat, so we can end winter 6 weeks early.

How can I tell slightly iffy greens from those that need to be thrown away?
 
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Feb 2, 2016
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Start a herb shop that features the following products:

Kratom - A mild sedative that relieves pain
Maca - A natural herb that stimulates sexual passions
Sun Opener - Another lesser known herb that gives off a mild "high" similar to cannabis

How can manage to pay off my debt and build credit from scratch?
 
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Sam91

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Get a balance transfer or a new identity methink.

So I discounted a poster's bad advice and took out my real trumpet. My neighbours are incensed yet again. How do I resolve this?
 
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LaSorcia

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Join the circus so you can learn to use throwing knives more accurately.

I'd really like to win a tv cookery contest. I don't even know how to enter.
 
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lucypevensie

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The door, duh. Just go to where the filming takes place and walk in. Don't forget to bring your own knives.

We have to be somewhere at 5PM, and it's about 40 minutes away, but we have to stop for gas and the bank for some cash first. When should we leave the house to get there on time?
 
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Quid est Veritas?

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Best gas up before the bank. Always leave the motor running when you rob a bank. Don't worry, the alibi of 'being somewhere at 5 PM' will still work, seeing that you have all of us here as sterling witnesses.

How can I get green dye out of my son's hair?!
 
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lucypevensie

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We all know that yellow and blue make green. So add yellow to make hair blue, or add blue to make yellow. You can also add red to make it brown. Or you can just use straight bleach and make him blond. The options are endless!

How is it possible to cheer up when it is so darn cold?
 
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lucypevensie

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Let all the food in your fridge go bad over the next 40 days, and the smell in your kitchen will be so bad that you won't even want to eat.

What happens if one forgets to do their daily Lenten scripture reading?
 
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