Frustrated with the lack of singles groups?

[NokingbutCHRIST20]

Is anyone else getting fed up with churches just throwing the singles off to the side, ignoring them completely, or straight up keeping them apart?

I remember 10-15 or so years ago, nearly every congregation had some sort of a singles ministry where there was volunteering, study, and no pressure activities. Yet now, you don't even hear an acknowledgement that we still even exist.

 

[Ronit]

Is anyone else getting fed up with churches just throwing the singles off to the side, ignoring them completely, or straight up keeping them apart?

I remember 10-15 or so years ago, nearly every congregation had some sort of a singles ministry where there was volunteering, study, and no pressure activities. Yet now, you don't even hear an acknowledgement that we still even exist.

I've heard that happens a lot.
I have a really good book by:Albert Y. Hsu
called Singles At The Crossroads:A Fresh Perspective on Christian Singleness. He mentions this issue.
Check it out. Hope it helps
Ronit

 

[Joni Steele]

Have you considered heading up a Singles ministry yourself? Pray about it.

 

[bèlla]

Singles are too dependent on the church to act on their behalf. We have the technology and means to bring people together. There's no reason to sit on your hands and wait for them to do it for you. Be proactive.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

 

[DragonFox91]

Yes, big time. Particularly in the mid-to-late 20s & 30s.

 

[Faithfulandtrue]

Absolutely! It's sad because I feel we need Church counseling if not more so than married people. People tell me all the time it's hard being married and I agree but It's also hard being alone. I don't know why modern churches are like this now but their needs to be an awakening! Lord please bring us all together in this! Amen!

 

[Sketcher]

I was in a young adult's group that wasn't a singles group per se, but most people in it were single so that was definitely a component of it. And every attempt I made to be "more than friends" was unsuccessful. So even with such a group, it's not going to solve the problem of singleness for everybody. Therefore, when joining any group, set your expectations correctly for what you want out of it, and be honest with yourself. Good groups are good for a lot of people in a lot of ways, but they won't be everything that everybody needs.

 

[angelsaroundme]

One issue would be figuring out what to make it. Is it a place for people to relax? Is it to prepare yourself for marriage? Is it to meet your soul mate?

 

[He is Worthy]

Sometimes single groups ends because they just are match makers.

 

[linux.poet]

Sometimes single groups ends because they just are match makers.

For some people, that would be a positive outcome.

 

[He is Worthy]

In my case it is a negative outcome I stay away from single groups.

 

[SRTera]

I know some churches lump the singles in with the college kids, but then if you hit like 30 but still single you need to join a Sunday school class/small group on the 30 to 49 age group so that makes it harder with that type of age group

 

[Tony Ramirez]

My church is all couples. My life group is all couples. I am single in my mid 40's and there is absolutely nothing for me. Everyone in my church is hitched. It just makes me more depressed in attending that I am going less and starting to backslide again.

 

[linux.poet]

I just got back from a singles group meeting in my area that meets once a month. Apparently I've found the church most dedicated to singles ministry in the area, if not the entire U.S. They interviewed a singles pastor of the church at the event and he said the church has a "when all other groups died, we survived" mentality.

He also said that what is killing singles groups is online dating. So if you want singles groups to come back, stop online dating and start organizing meetups between Christian singles in the local area.

 

[peaceful-forest]

I just got back from a singles group meeting in my area that meets once a month. Apparently I've found the church most dedicated to singles ministry in the area, if not the entire U.S. They interviewed a singles pastor of the church at the event and he said the church has a "when all other groups died, we survived" mentality.

He also said that what is killing singles groups is online dating. So if you want singles groups to come back, stop online dating and start organizing meetups between Christian singles in the local area.

That sounds wonderful!

Do you think what he said was true - about online dating killing singles groups? Do you think there could be other explanations?

At the former church I attended for several years, their excuse for not having a singles group was "there were more important things to focus on". My experience has been that the Baptists are bad about neglecting needs and responsibilities of the church because saving unsaved people is the most important thing in the world.

In one of his sermons, or maybe a radio podcast, David Jeremiah said he had received several comments from singles that the church treats them "like a second class citizen".

 

[linux.poet]

Do you think what he said was true - about online dating killing singles groups? Do you think there could be other explanations?

I don't really have an opinion or thoughts on this, as I've never tried online dating and my main church doesn't have any single people who are my age. I can't fault them for not having a group when there is only one me.

 

[bèlla]

Do you think what he said was true - about online dating killing singles groups? Do you think there could be other explanations?

No, and your experience proves there are other factors involved. The Internet’s been around for years. Why didn’t they stem the tide or counter it? Oftentimes nothing occurs until it affects the bottom line.

In one of his sermons, or maybe a radio podcast, David Jeremiah said he had received several comments from singles that the church treats them "like a second class citizen".

I’ve heard the same from several here. That wasn’t my experience but I wasn’t seeking a companion and was busy serving. I conducted my search online to widen the net geographically and narrow it in other areas.

While I limited my engagements to this medium and fared well; I don’t think its ideal for everyone. Nor do I recommend placing your eggs in one basket. A little diversity is usually best.

~bella