Found Christ now no sex...

[holo]

That's not the only side of God, though. The overly soft interpretation you have of Scripture denies what most of Scripture says. Jesus cut out the burdens that human teachers gave, but God did not give. There's a difference between that and saying it's fine to outright disobey a clear-cut commandment as long as you meant well.

I base this more on experience than interpretation (though experience has put scripture in an entire new light for me). I have experienced a God who isn't legalistic in any way. The way he has treated me is my basis for how I treat others (or rather, it should be). I believe Jesus came to redeem people from law, not to merely amputate part of it and add another. Therefore I don't read the bible as a rule book either.

And don't you think these two "meant well"?

From what I can tell from Scripture, God is grieved at their current situation. He understands that they just came back to Him and are essentially new at this, but He desires them to follow Him now.

But are they not following him just because they're not married but still live together?

 

[Sketcher]

But are they not following him just because they're not married but still live together?

They've begun to follow Him by turning back to Him, they need to follow Him more closely in specific ways. One of which is the thing we're discussing now, since she told us, and the rest are known to God and possibly to them. Sex outside of marraige is not following God, period. Neither is lying, stealing, you get the idea. If we don't follow God in these "smaller" ways, we won't be following Him in the "big" way, not for long.

 

[natanya]

I just dont know what to do anymore. We have rededicated our lifes to christ and now we know having sex is wrong but we live together. We will not be able to live apart. We have been engaged since november. I just dont know what to do anymore. Knowing that we are sinning is really hard.

How are you doing?

I am very happy that you have found Jesus. What happened to cause this change and what exactly do you now believe? Do you plan to read the Bible?

You have to decide now whether you are going to follow the Bible or whether you are going to follow society. It is your decision but you have to choose. In MOST situations what the Bible says will be the OPPOSITE of what is considered normal or acceptable today. If you decide to follow Jesus, you will be DIFFERENT and you have to be prepared for this.

Whenever you have a question about what God would want you to do, you can search the Bible online and pray. Do not listen to anything that anyone says unless he/she quotes scripture to support their opinion. Many of the responses that you received were based on modern society opinions and were the opposite of what the Bible says. God's word does not change so you can always rely on it. There are many verses about sex in the Bible so you will find an answer to your question.

Speaking the truth in love.
Psalm 52:3 & Ephesians 4:15

 

[belladonic-haze]

Marraige begins at a wedding and ends at a spouse's death. That's what marraige IS.

It doesn't have to be as hard as you're making it out to be, though. How goes the search?

Sorry I made you feel that way, it wasn't my intention.

According to the Bible, that is sin, sorry. Furthermore, your friend just got lucky. With most people who cohabitate, it ends in stuff that is much, much worse. Some of my friends could tell you that, they learned the hard way first hand.

If it's a wedding, it's a wedding.

But if one isn't willing to sign the papers or whatever to get "official" I would question their commitment to one another.

It has its place within marraige where it is good and beautiful. Without that foundation, it is out of place. Without the underlying commitment of marraige, sex is cheapened.

Marriage is not the wedding day thingy. Marriage is the bond between two people that love and respect each other for who they are. And a whole lot more. It is not just a period of time.

Why is there so much divorce then? These people also live together. They just have that small piece of paper. That piece of paper is not a magic wand that turns lust in to eternal love (or at least until someone dies)....

I did not marry because I lusted my hubs....I loved him and still love him....

And the sex is the same.....it's making love. Now if I would bump into Russell Crowe....that would be lust. I do not know the man.....but I love my husband and I loved him when he was my fiance, and we lived together before we married and made love. The priest who married us (I married in a Catholic church. My hubs was Catholic at the time) said it would be ridiculous to repent for the sex we already had. It's nonsense, because that would be lying...repenting is that you feel guilty and awful about it and never wished you did it, because we were going to marry soon.....well, duhuh...I married the man, so I do like making love to him.

LOL the priest also said that if he was a conservative he would have wanted us to repent, but we lived in the 20th century and that would it be silly......

 

[Gukkor]

If you are married in the only way that truly counts, you have nothing to worry about.

 

[holo]

Do not listen to anything that anyone says unless he/she quotes scripture to support their opinion.

Hm, where does the bible say that?

 

[Sketcher]

Hm, where does the bible say that?

See my signature.

 

[Sketcher]

Marriage is not the wedding day thingy. Marriage is the bond between two people that love and respect each other for who they are. And a whole lot more. It is not just a period of time.

Which is officially established at the wedding.

Why is there so much divorce then? These people also live together. They just have that small piece of paper. That piece of paper is not a magic wand that turns lust in to eternal love (or at least until someone dies)....

There is so much divorce now because of all the irresponsibility in this society and because marraige isn't considered as sacred as it used to be. No, the piece of paper isn't a magic wand, but if you're not afraid to get it, you're not afraid of the commitment. Without the commitment, sex does not have a proper foundation.

And the sex is the same.....it's making love. Now if I would bump into Russell Crowe....that would be lust. I do not know the man.....but I love my husband and I loved him when he was my fiance, and we lived together before we married and made love. The priest who married us (I married in a Catholic church. My hubs was Catholic at the time) said it would be ridiculous to repent for the sex we already had. It's nonsense, because that would be lying...repenting is that you feel guilty and awful about it and never wished you did it, because we were going to marry soon.....well, duhuh...I married the man, so I do like making love to him.

You're right about what repentance should be, but that doesn't make what you did before marraige right.

LOL the priest also said that if he was a conservative he would have wanted us to repent, but we lived in the 20th century and that would it be silly......

Again, God's laws are timeless. He does not change.

 

[Gukkor]

Which is officially established at the wedding.


There is so much divorce now because of all the irresponsibility in this society and because marraige isn't considered as sacred as it used to be. No, the piece of paper isn't a magic wand, but if you're not afraid to get it, you're not afraid of the commitment. Without the commitment, sex does not have a proper foundation.


You're right about what repentance should be, but that doesn't make what you did before marraige right.


Again, God's laws are timeless. He does not change.

For God's laws to be truly immutable, it would take more than God never changing, it would also mean that we never change, and of course, we do. The rules placed on a child change as the child grows older. That doesn't mean the parent is changing, but that the parent is properly responding to the change in the child. It is the same with God and Man. Milk to meat, and all that.

 

[TexasGirl06]

????

God does not change His ways.....to fit man.

God and His ways are Holy.
Man is sinful.

God's ways are perfect...
and His Word is flawless.

His Word says no sex outside of the covenant of marriage.
That is not going to change.
Our circumstances will not cause God's Word to change.

So...really the issue here is:

Do I believe that God's Word is indeed the the true Word of God?
And...do I love Him and therefore follow Him.

The business of "it feels good", "it sounds good", "we're all doing it these days"...is a bunch of baloney.

Followers of the Lord Jesus Christ are to follow His teachings. Period.

Not the teaching of any man.

 

[Gukkor]

????

God does not change His ways.....to fit man.

God and His ways are Holy.
Man is sinful.

God's ways are perfect...
and His Word is flawless.

His Word says no sex outside of the covenant of marriage.
That is not going to change.
Our circumstances will not cause God's Word to change.

So...really the issue here is:

Do I believe that God's Word is indeed the the true Word of God?
And...do I love Him and therefore follow Him.

The business of "it feels good", "it sounds good", "we're all doing it these days"...is a bunch of baloney.

Followers of the Lord Jesus Christ are to follow His teachings. Period.

Not the teaching of any man.

I never said God changes His ways, I said He changes the rules. And let me clarify that statement: when I say that He changes the rules, I don't mean on a universal level. I mean that as we grow on an individual level in our relationship with God, the "rules" change in relation to us.

As for "it feels good," "it sounds good," etc., what does that have to do with anything? Nobody advocated those types of statements in this thread, as far as I can tell.

 

[natanya]

I never said God changes His ways, I said He changes the rules. And let me clarify that statement: when I say that He changes the rules, I don't mean on a universal level. I mean that as we grow on an individual level in our relationship with God, the "rules" change in relation to us.

As for "it feels good," "it sounds good," etc., what does that have to do with anything? Nobody advocated those types of statements in this thread, as far as I can tell.

Please explain what you believe about the Bible- do you believe in any of the scriptures?

 

[Gukkor]

Please explain what you believe about the Bible- do you believe in any of the scriptures?

I believe in all of them, why do you ask?

 

[holo]

See my signature.

I don't get it.

Without the commitment, sex does not have a proper foundation.

I agree, but commitment doesn't depend on papers or ceremonies. That's just something you need to give them the stamp of approval (and IMO the endless stamping is the problem here).

 

[bithiah2]

its financial. Big time. We both cannot live in california on one income. We have never lived apart. We dont have a wedding planned, because no one will pay for it. We are broke right now, we could just get marreid but I fear that if I just get married now that we will not have those memories. I mean I wouldnt even get a dress, or have pictures or get to cut a cake...

well, you have choices:

you can get married now and have your cake,dress and pictures later on

you can separate and do what is right, since you know that you are not supposed to be having sex outside of marriage

you can continue to sin and feel bad about it

getting married is not about a cake, a dress and some pictures. it is about being comitted to the one you love for life. you have a whole lifetime to look back on. it is always the best thing to please God.

blessings
bithiah2

 

[Forealzchola]

????

God does not change His ways.....to fit man.

God and His ways are Holy.
Man is sinful.

God's ways are perfect...
and His Word is flawless.

His Word says no sex outside of the covenant of marriage.
That is not going to change.
Our circumstances will not cause God's Word to change.

So...really the issue here is:

Do I believe that God's Word is indeed the the true Word of God?
And...do I love Him and therefore follow Him.

The business of "it feels good", "it sounds good", "we're all doing it these days"...is a bunch of baloney.

Followers of the Lord Jesus Christ are to follow His teachings. Period.

Not the teaching of any man.

AMEN GURL! THAT IS THE TRUTH...IM TIRED OF ALL THESE PEOPLE THAT SAY THEY LOVE GOD BUT DONT OBEY HIM, AND USE EXCUSES TO NOT LIVE BY HIS WORD. GOD BLESS

 

[eoe]

I have not gotten too far but I just have to say:

I mean I wouldnt even get a dress, or have pictures or get to cut a cake...

Given a choice between cake and sex - I will leave the cake. Get married. Wedding cake really is not that good.


Either that or start preparing a defense of "God I did not follow your commandments because I wanted a cake". I don't know how well that will go over tho. I don't suggest trying it.

How about "God you know I really did believe in you, I just did not want to do anything you told me to because well... It really was not convenient at the time and I really enjoyed the sin."

(Matthew 7:21) Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.

(Matthew 7:22) Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?

(Matthew 7:23) And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

(Matthew 7:24) Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:

(Matthew 7:25) And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.

(Matthew 7:26) And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand:

(Matthew 7:27) And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.

(Matthew 7:28) And it came to pass, when Jesus had ended these sayings, the people were astonished at his doctrine:

(Matthew 7:29) For he taught them as one having authority, and not as the scribes.

(1 John 2:1) My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous:

(1 John 2:2) And he is the propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world.

(1 John 2:3) And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments.

(1 John 2:4) He that saith, I know him, and keepeth not his commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.

(Luke 9:23) And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.

Here is the very beginning of Christainity.

Deny yourself.

Pick up a cross.

Follow him.

That is the beginning. It is required of ANY who would follow him.

(1 John 2:15) Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

(1 John 2:16) For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

Anyone make a joke about having a cake and eating it too yet?


Good luck lovesbrightpink, may God grant you and yours everything that is profitable to your souls. Christianity is not an easy religion.

 

[holo]

getting married is not about a cake, a dress and some pictures. it is about being comitted to the one you love for life.

And yet you and most others on this thread, reduce it to just that; a bloody ceremony! And you condemn them for not having gone through that ceremony, and pay no respect whatsoever to the fact that they DO love each other and DO want to spend their lives together!

Christianity is not an easy religion.

Indeed! Certainly this kind of christianity, at least. I'm glad Jesus isn't so rule-bound and legalistic as you folks. There's no way you would ever dream of accepting the people he did, or look to the hearts like he did. You've done to the gospel exactly what the pharisees did.

To the OP: my advice is to stick to your man and leave this kind of christianity.

 

[Sketcher]

I don't get it.

It's a good Sola Scriptura verse. so is Isaiah 8:20 and Deuteronomy 5:32-33.

I agree, but commitment doesn't depend on papers or ceremonies. That's just something you need to give them the stamp of approval (and IMO the endless stamping is the problem here).

Fear of commitment is the #1 reason why people avoid papers and ceremonies. They don't want anyone or anything to hold them accountable should the relationship fail. If you're going to be having sex, you ought to be well past that point. If you really are not afraid of divorce and really believe the two of you can make it, you should get married. These folks here are just poor, but there are ways of tying the knot and trusting God with their relationship. Every Christian couple needs to allow God into their relationship, and part of that means following His ways. One of those ways happens to be no sex before marraige. For the sake of the relationship, for the sake of these two, and for the sake of God, they need to stop sleeping together and stop putting off getting married. They need to get a hold of a Godly-wise pastor who will counsel them and marry them - he will have a lot more practical advice for them than anyone who posted in this thread can offer.

 

[holo]

It's a good Sola Scriptura verse. so is Isaiah 8:20 and Deuteronomy 5:32-33.

Only if you equal "scripture" with "the word of God" (and put more weight on the letter than the Spirit).

Fear of commitment is the #1 reason why people avoid papers and ceremonies. They don't want anyone or anything to hold them accountable should the relationship fail.

In a relationship, the only ones to hold each other responsible is, well, each other

Not pastors or anyone else. If my GF says she wants to spend her life with me, I naturally focus more on her wish than the papers.

If you're going to be having sex, you ought to be well past that point. If you really are not afraid of divorce and really believe the two of you can make it, you should get married. These folks here are just poor, but there are ways of tying the knot and trusting God with their relationship.

But aren't they already past that point? All that lack are simple formalities, really. And of course, you can trust God with your relationship with or without a ring!

Every Christian couple needs to allow God into their relationship, and part of that means following His ways. One of those ways happens to be no sex before marraige. For the sake of the relationship, for the sake of these two, and for the sake of God, they need to stop sleeping together and stop putting off getting married.

Why so legalistic? Do you really think God is that bent on the legal and practical aspect of it? It's like it would be ok with God if I married someone I didn't love, if I only had the proper stamps and ceremony, but God would get mad if I really truly loved someone and wanted to spend and give my life to them, but couldn't afford a ring. I think that really, really sucks, and it's completely contrary to the gospel and God's intetions.