Forgiveness and Repentance

[zippy2006]

Is repentance required for forgiveness? If someone sins against you, do they have to repent or at least admit their sin before you can forgive them? I encourage you to support your answer with reason, Scripture, and extra-Biblical sources.

I have heard different views on this over the years. The view that repentance is not required seems to emphasize a sort of therapeutic view of forgiveness--that it is meant to relieve oneself of a burden. The view that repentance is required seems to emphasize the renewal of a broken relationship. I still haven't made up my mind.

 

[Kenny'sID]

Very good question. I'll have to look for them but there is indication one needs to ask for forgiveness from us, and that's where the order to forgive others fall into place. I tend to believe that but am not 100% convinced.

If someone comes to me and says their sorry, I'm like, how can I not forgive them, most likely my heart will melt with a sincere apology. Many of us want to forgive, badly, but it doesn't feel right to do so unless they ask, and there may be a reason for that.

I hope someone can find something specific on that in the bible and post it here.

The following would indicate no forgiveness if they don't repent, or if there is no admission. and that is towards christian brother, so what does that say as to how to treat the non christian?

A Brother who Sins
Mathew 18:15 If your brother sins against you, go and confront him privately. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ 17If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, regard him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.…

 

[frienden thalord]

We should always pray their forgivness.
when the jews stoned Stephen he did not wait for them to repent
he just said LORD hold not This sin to their charge.
However we are to do the examplewith believers..............because an unrepentant
believer is in danger and must repent and be restored .
so we do the pattern as JESUS taught. We can forgive, but we cant hang out with
the unrepentant.

 

[HenryM]

In Lord's prayer that Jesus gives, He says: "forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." There is no mentioning of our debtors asking us to forgive them, like: "forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors who asked their debts to be forgiven."

Also, Jesus instructs us to love our enemies. You can't love your enemies unless you first forgave them for what they did or said against you (and they must did or said something bad, since they are your enemy).

I think you are in good place if you forgive those who don't ask for it, nor they repent for what they've done to you. To forgive is an act for your soul. Their asking for forgiveness or their repentance is for their soul. Those are two different issues. At the same time, that doesn't mean all is peachy between you if you forgive them. You forgave them for your soul, and you love them as human beings, while you act towards them according to their's unrepentant attitude (for example, you might choose not to get in close relationship with them, as is mentioned in post above in quoted Matthew 18:15-17).

 

[Soyeong]

Luke 23:34 Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.

The people that Jesus was asking the Father to forgive had not repented.

 

[5thKingdom]

Is repentance required for forgiveness? If someone sins against you, do they have to repent or at least admit their sin before you can forgive them? I encourage you to support your answer with reason, Scripture, and extra-Biblical sources.

I have heard different views on this over the years. The view that repentance is not required seems to emphasize a sort of therapeutic view of forgiveness--that it is meant to relieve oneself of a burden. The view that repentance is required seems to emphasize the renewal of a broken relationship. I still haven't made up my mind.

You failed to identify the issue.
When you ask if "repentance is required for forgiveness"....
are you asking about the forgiveness (by God) for the sin
or are you asking about you forgiving some insult?

Repentance is required for forgiveness of sin (by God)
but TRUE repentance is the RESULT of His Forgiveness (salvation)
and not the CAUSE of it.

The Bible is very clear that regeneration is the CAUSE of all (real) repentance
and not the RESULT of any work that man can do...


.

 

[Kenny'sID]

In Lord's prayer that Jesus gives, He says: "forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." There is no mentioning of our debtors asking us to forgive them, like: "forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors who asked their debts to be forgiven."

But that doesn't really tell us anything, there is no evidence that it is not assumed one should ask forgiveness.

We have feelings and emotions for a reason, and the emotional battle some have with forgiveness within themselves when their neighbor rides past them on the bicycle he stole from them is great, and telling us something. While the feeling we have if the man brings the bike back if he can or even just gives a sincere apology, that to me feels way right to forgive, no battle within at all.

Then there are people that will not forgive even in the latter of what I just mentioned, and I think that is what God may frown on. Does God just forgive us, or is it as we are directed by Christ in the very same line there of the "Lords Prayer" to ask for forgiveness form God?...of course it is.

"Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us" Meaning God forgives if we ask, and that very very strongly indicates we do the same for others.

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

Or "I did it, It took the bicycle" ...justification for forgiveness, as well as expectation from God that we do so.

The mention of Stephen and even Christ as he was being crucified, forgiving before the fact, still is not evidence that is what is expected, it could just show they were extra good at heart.

 

[zippy2006]

Taking the replies into account and searching myself, here are some related verses:

For the view that forgiveness requires repentance:

• “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every word may be confirmed by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector." (Matthew 18:15-17)
  
• If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and will forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)
• Take heed to yourselves; if your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him; and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, and says, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.” (Luke 17:3-4)
  
• Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord, (Acts 3:19)

Against the view that forgiveness requires repentance:

• And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34a)
  
• "And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against any one; so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” (Mark 11:25)
• And he knelt down and cried with a loud voice, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” (Acts 7:60a)

 

[zippy2006]

Very good question. I'll have to look for them but there is indication one needs to ask for forgiveness from us, and that's where the order to forgive others fall into place. I tend to believe that but am not 100% convinced.

If someone comes to me and says their sorry, I'm like, how can I not forgive them, most likely my heart will melt with a sincere apology. Many of us want to forgive, badly, but it doesn't feel right to do so unless they ask, and there may be a reason for that.

I hope someone can find something specific on that in the bible and post it here.

The following would indicate no forgiveness if they don't repent, or if there is no admission. and that is towards christian brother, so what does that say as to how to treat the non christian?

A Brother who Sins
Mathew 18:15 If your brother sins against you, go and confront him privately. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ 17If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, regard him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.…

Good thoughts. Another argument for your position is this: it seems that we must ask God for forgiveness before he forgives us our sins, therefore the same principle should hold when dealing with other human beings.

when the jews stoned Stephen he did not wait for them to repent
he just said LORD hold not This sin to their charge.

Good point. I wonder if it is significant that he did not use the word "forgive"? Is it the same thing?

However we are to do the examplewith believers..............because an unrepentant
believer is in danger and must repent and be restored.

Kenny'sID noted that distinction as well. But didn't Stephen "forgive" nonbelievers without their repentance? Or do you consider Jews believers?

In Lord's prayer that Jesus gives, He says: "forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." There is no mentioning of our debtors asking us to forgive them, like: "forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors who asked their debts to be forgiven."

I agree with Kenny'sID. I don't see this as determining the issue one way or another.

I think you are in good place if you forgive those who don't ask for it, nor they repent for what they've done to you. To forgive is an act for your soul. Their asking for forgiveness or their repentance is for their soul. Those are two different issues.

But if forgiveness is only an act for my soul, then why would someone desire that I forgive them? Surely they are desiring that I do something for them, and not just for myself?

Luke 23:34 Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.

The people that Jesus was asking the Father to forgive had not repented.

I was waiting for someone to post this. I have a hard time with this passage, because if you don't know that you've done something wrong, have you really sinned? Can sin without knowledge be a serious sin? Yet Jesus does ask the Father to forgive them.

But that doesn't really tell us anything, there is no evidence that it is not assumed one should ask forgiveness.

I agree.

We have feelings and emotions for a reason, and the emotional battle some have with forgiveness within themselves when their neighbor rides past them on the bicycle he stole from them is great, and telling us something. While the feeling we have if the man brings the bike back if he can or even just gives a sincere apology, that to me feels way right to forgive, no battle within at all.

I have never considered using natural reactions as a way to gauge God's law regarding forgiveness, but I think you might be onto something.

 

[Soyeong]

I was waiting for someone to post this. I have a hard time with this passage, because if you don't know that you've done something wrong, have you really sinned? Can sin without knowledge be a serious sin? Yet Jesus does ask the Father to forgive them.

Indeed, you can sin unintentionally. Sin offerings were only for unintentional sins:

Leviticus 4:1-2 The Lord said to Moses, 2 “Say to the Israelites: ‘When anyone sins unintentionally and does what is forbidden in any of the Lord’s commands—

 

[zippy2006]

Indeed, you can sin unintentionally. Sin offerings were only for unintentional sins:

Leviticus 4:1-2 The Lord said to Moses, 2 “Say to the Israelites: ‘When anyone sins unintentionally and does what is forbidden in any of the Lord’s commands—

That's true, but it was considered a lesser offense and could never be enacted until one actually realized that they had done something wrong (Lev 4:14). In any case, I don't think forgiveness out of ignorance can be held up as anything like the epitome of forgiveness, precisely because the offense given is unintentional. Forgiveness only really comes into its own once we start talking about intentional offenses. It is easy to forgive someone who offends by accident, but much harder to forgive someone who intentionally offends.

 

[Soyeong]

That's true, but it was considered a lesser offense and could never be enacted until one actually realized that they had done something wrong.

Romans 5:13 To be sure, sin was in the world before the law was given, but sin is not charged against anyone's account where there is no law.

In the US, we can be held accountable for doing something that we didn't know was illegal because we are responsible for knowing the law, but if we can't be expected to know that something is a sin, then ignorance is a valid excuse. However, Paul said that the Law was given to reveal what sin is (Romans 3:20) and that without the Law he wouldn't even know what sin was (Romans 7:7), so now that God has revealed through His Law which things are sins, we are now responsible for knowing the Law and acting accordingly by grace through faith, and are now without excuse. Willful disobedience or rebellion against God is indeed a greater offence.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Is repentance required for forgiveness?

The BLOOD OF JESUS, Y'SHUA MESSIAH,
is required for forgiveness.
The FATHER in HEAVEN identifies multitudes in HIS WORD who are not forgiven.
So, some day, perhaps, it would be good, IF THE FATHER GRANTS IT,
to know who is not forgiven.
HIS DECISION is FOREVER.

 

[Kenny'sID]

I have never considered using natural reactions as a way to gauge God's law regarding forgiveness, but I think you might be onto something.

If God does put his law in out heart, there would be something from within guiding us. I can't say for certain our emotions are how we know how he wants us to act or not but I'm not saying it isn't either.
I can say if he does put it in our heart, something has to tell us what that is.

 

[zippy2006]

I am considering this verse:

And when he had said this, he breathed on them, and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” (John 20:22-23)​

Under what condition might the Apostles not forgive sins? Lack of repentance seems like a prime candidate, especially given the other scriptures related to the question.

 

[HenryM]

...if forgiveness is only an act for my soul, then why would someone desire that I forgive them? Surely they are desiring that I do something for them, and not just for myself?

They would ask for forgiveness because it's good for their soul. If you have wronged someone, and you honestly repented and asked that person to forgive you, you have done good before God. It doesn't really matter, for you, if that person will actually forgive you or not. What matters is that you honestly repented for what you did.

Now, if said person does forgive you, that doesn't add to your righteousness before God (it was already added when you repented and asked for forgiveness), but it does add to his or her, since forgiving is an act for one's own soul.

 

[HenryM]

If one should wait to first be asked for forgiveness, before forgiving, it would result in living life resentful to basically everybody who ever substantially wronged you. Because most people who do something intentionally and substantially wrong usually don't ask for forgiveness (especially they don't do it honestly, from the heart). Not to mention that it would be impossible to love one's enemies, as Jesus commands us to do.

 

[zippy2006]

If one should wait to first be asked for forgiveness, before forgiving, it would result in living life resentful to basically everybody who ever substantially wronged you. Because most people who do something intentionally and substantially wrong usually don't ask for forgiveness (especially they don't do it honestly, from the heart).

First I would say that we should not simply wait, but should confront those who have seriously sinned against us. This is the basis of Matthew 18:15-17.

Second, I agree that it is unhealthy to hold grudges, but is not holding a grudge the same as forgiving someone? Maybe it is. Some common definitions signify that it might be.

Third, I think it must be admitted that forgiveness with repentance is preferable to forgiveness without repentance, and that even if we are called to the latter we are all the more called to the former.

Not to mention that it would be impossible to love one's enemies, as Jesus commands us to do.

I would say that loving one's enemies entails telling them when they have sinned against you and hoping that they repent. To lack this is to love them less fully than we ought. Yet to forgive the unrepentant may also be a sign of love.

 

[zippy2006]

Now, if said person does forgive you, that doesn't add to your righteousness before God (it was already added when you repented and asked for forgiveness), but it does add to his or her, since forgiving is an act for one's own soul.

So do you think the repentant party receives nothing from the forgiveness of the offended party? That seems strange to me.

 

[HenryM]

So do you think the repentant party receives nothing from the forgiveness of the offended party? That seems strange to me.

I don't know if it's absolutely nothing, but if someone forgives you, it's on his or her righteousness, not yours. I don't see how it could add to your righteousness. You already get addition to you righteousness when you repented and asked for forgiveness.

But you do receive things as a result of the forgiveness of the offended party, for example renewed opportunities with that person, but that was not what I was talking about. I was talking about building gold, and silver and precious stones before God (1 Corinthians 3:12-15) within the act itself.