Fight or accept autism

[Clintos]

Is autism something that can or cannot be changed.

Is autsim like a arm that has been cut off or not grown at birth which means it can not be changed? or is it something that can be changed like a persons way of viewing and perceiving life and the world around them?

Should I fight to change or should I accept?

imo it can not be changed, but it can be managed like diabetes?

Accept the things you can no change, change the things you can, and have the knowledge to know the difference.

I am trying to have the knowledge to know the difference.

 

[Clintos]

I have Aspergers which means that I do not fit in with normal people or autistic people. I am in a tough situation.

 

[Hetta]

Accept the diagnosis if it is accurate. Have you been diagnosed by a specialist?

If you have been properly diagnosed as autistic, arm yourself with knowledge about yourself. No, you cannot "change it" but I believe that understanding it can help you move forward in life.

 

[Rescued One]

Is autism something that can or cannot be changed.

Is autsim like a arm that has been cut off or not grown at birth which means it can not be changed? or is it something that can be changed like a persons way of viewing and perceiving life and the world around them?

Should I fight to change or should I accept?

imo it can not be changed, but it can be managed like diabetes?

Accept the things you can no change, change the things you can, and have the knowledge to know the difference.

I am trying to have the knowledge to know the difference.

Have you read Temple Grandin's book?

I think it's okay if some people are autistic. We aren't all clones of one another anyway. And I love the serenity prayer! Following it can be difficult though.

 

[Hetta]

My son has Asperger's, Clintos. I've seen him struggle all of his life. He's 17. At least you accept your diagnosis, which he does not. I wish he would do some research on Asperger's because I believe it would help him hugely, and it may help you too. When he was diagnosed, his high school helped him with things like a speech therapist. There's nothing wrong with his speech, per se, but the specialist was helping him more with interactions with others, how to look at them, speak to them, etc. I think it did help him but he hated being marked out as different, so we ended up withdrawing him from that program. :/ You are in a much better place because you're actively looking for help. I wish you luck.

 

[Clintos]

Accept the diagnosis if it is accurate. Have you been diagnosed by a specialist?

If you have been properly diagnosed as autistic, arm yourself with knowledge about yourself. No, you cannot "change it" but I believe that understanding it can help you move forward in life.

I have been officially diagnosed 2 years ago. I have several books on it but have yet read them fully, the little I did read seemed depressing. it seem that there is no meds for it so my specialist treats me for anxiety, depression and my schizo-affective dissorder

 

[Hetta]

I have been officially diagnosed 2 years ago. I have several books on it but have yet read them fully, the little I did read seemed depressing. it seem that there is no meds for it so my specialist treats me for anxiety, depression and my schizo-affective dissorder

There is more out there that shouldn't be depressing! The information they gave me from high school was actually quite positive and I've read a lot of websites with good, positive encouragement and advice. Books might be a bit heavy going. I've never heard of Temple Grandin who Phoebe Ann suggests, but a quick glance at her website looks quite good. Look around and find something that isn't a textbook and, no, there are no meds and I'm honestly glad for that. Autistic people have amazing minds. I see the things that my son comes up with (his computer abilities are outstanding) and I'm glad that he can't be medically "altered." Perhaps your specialist could help you with the kind of social skills assistance that they were offering my son at school. Is that where you struggle?

 

[Clintos]

My son has Asperger's, Clintos. I've seen him struggle all of his life. He's 17. At least you accept your diagnosis, which he does not. I wish he would do some research on Asperger's because I believe it would help him hugely, and it may help you too. When he was diagnosed, his high school helped him with things like a speech therapist. There's nothing wrong with his speech, per se, but the specialist was helping him more with interactions with others, how to look at them, speak to them, etc. I think it did help hihe hated being marked out as different, so we ended up withdrawing him from that program. :/ You are in a much better place because you're actively looking for help. I wish you luck.

Thanks. I accept my condition and know I need to do things to change. it just seems that as you get older and you have hard wired personality and social skills that it is next to impossible to change them. It affect every aspect of my life to the point that I lock myself up 22 hours a days in my apartment.

 

[Clintos]

There is more out there that shouldn't be depressing! The information they gave me from high school was actually quite positive and I've read a lot of websites with good, positive encouragement and advice. Books might be a bit heavy going. I've never heard of Temple Grandin who Phoebe Ann suggests, but a quick glance at her website looks quite good. Look around and find something that isn't a textbook and, no, there are no meds and I'm honestly glad for that. Autistic people have amazing minds. I see the things that my son comes up with (his computer abilities are outstanding) and I'm glad that he can't be medically "altered." Perhaps your specialist could help you with the kind of social skills assistance that they were offering my son at school. Is that where you struggle?

Yes, I struggle greatly with social skills to the point I do not attend church because of them and my insecurities, along with slight delussions. I've read that I probably have normal intelligence, but the lack in social skills make people think have an IQ problem. I currently collect disabilty and work a few hours a day doing a paper route but it is not good enough for me because I feel I can do much better.

 

[DaisyDay]

No meds, but there was something that temporarily altered perceptions - emotional perception - that I heard about on the radio - transcranial magnetic stimulation, which might interest you. It hasn't been well-studied and it is not approved, but it is something that's not total quackery.

www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2016/07/09/484810552/hope-still-races-ahead-of-evidence-in-magnet-treatment-for-autism and
What An Hour Of Emotion Makes Visible

 

[ByTheSpirit]

My two oldest children (ages 8 & 7) are autistic. It is a tough process. Acceptance takes a while. It took me many prayers, tears, and much time to accept what has happened to my angels. They are considered disabled by medical diagnosis but they are not disabled in the functional sense, it is really how you look at it.

Sure they can't talk as smoothly as others, in fact my daughter age 7 didn't say a word until she was over 3 years old. Yet they are both full of joy and happiness.

Point for the OP is don't look at it as a I am disabled thing. Autistic people have extraordinary abilities! I hope you find some resolution in this and know that you are not alone:

One last note, if someone mentions to you to "have more faith" and get healed from it, ignore them. It is not that God can't or won't heal you, but people can be overzealous and cause more harm than do good, especially if they pray for you and you aren't "healed". I have seen it so I just want to give that advice.

 

[Rescued One]

Thanks. I accept my condition and know I need to do things to change. it just seems that as you get older and you have hard wired personality and social skills that it is next to impossible to change them. It affect every aspect of my life to the point that I lock myself up 22 hours a days in my apartment.

I hear you! I think you'd love Temple Grandin's book; I do.

I have oodles of relatives that suffer from depression! Some of them have ruined their lives with alcohol. Who knows how many people from previous generations had autism when no one knew what to call it!

 

[Rescued One]

Yes, I struggle greatly with social skills to the point I do not attend church because of them and my insecurities, along with slight delussions. I've read that I probably have normal intelligence, but the lack in social skills make people think have an IQ problem. I currently collect disabilty and work a few hours a day doing a paper route but it is not good enough for me because I feel I can do much better.

Oh, how I can relate! I wonder if I'm autistic or if it's something else. I think you might try writing a book. You can do that in your apartment. I have at least two grandchildren who are autistic. I babysat an autistic toddler before I had any grandchildren. His parents moved away and the only thing I had taught him was how to climb into a high chair. That might have been a bad idea. I wish I could have babysat him longer.

 

[*LILAC]

Fighting it is a tiresome job. My son is 21 and autistic, didn't speak until the age of 10, so we've had many a battle of unnecessary battles! Ann, your post reminds me of my son. He was a climber and climbed on anything he (literally) could get both hands and feet on! LOL He's mellowed out ALOT now but when he was younger, there was no rest for the weary.

I think when we're not busy fighting it, we can accept it and even embrace it. If you, Clintos, think that you can do something to help you achieve better social skills then by all means, take a go at it. Is there a program in your area that you could attend?

My son barely sits through one hour of church. He gets up and wanders around or has very long bathroom breaks but there are speakers all throughout the church so he can still hear what is going on. We still get up and gently remind him he should sit down so as not to disturb others. When he hears little kids being noisy he'll turn around and try shushing them! So we know he's hearing us!

 

[BryanJohnMaloney]

Okay, so you lock yourself in 22 hours a day. So start there. Go with that as your beginning, but that doesn't have to be your end. Use that autistic mojo in your favor. You like to ruminate, to think, to examine, so examine! Pin down the specific things that discomfit you about not being locked in. Really nail those suckers to a display box. Figure out how to deal with one thing at a time. Take it that way.

And realize that you are real. You are human. You are the same level of Heir to God as anyone else. God sees your ASD the same way he sees brown hair or green eyes, just something that is part of you.

 

[Foxfyre]

Thanks. I accept my condition and know I need to do things to change. it just seems that as you get older and you have hard wired personality and social skills that it is next to impossible to change them. It affect every aspect of my life to the point that I lock myself up 22 hours a days in my apartment.

I am not sure what CF policy is about posting links to other sites, but I typed Support Groups for Aspergers into my browser and found some good information including on line sites for folks who share your particular condition to share their experiences and help one another.

My observation is that people with Aspergers are generally intelligent, and insightful people but are socially disadvantaged as you describe. (I hate the term 'high functioning') You find it much easier to relate to us here than you would in person, yes? And yet to us you come across as articulate and perfectly normal in this setting.

I suspect if you could find a real live support group of other nice people who also deal with Aspergers, that would also be more comfortable and useful for you.

I applaud you for working on ways to deal with the syndrome and will wish for you strength, insight, and everything that will help you with that.

 

[Rescued One]

I find this informative:
Chromosomal abnormality linked to autism disorders

A lot of information is helpful but I like to find reliable sources, and not having an M. D., I just ask myself if the information is plausible. I find it frustrating when the general public thinks they are experts on the topic.

I enjoy watching shows about various health topics and rare diseases.

 

[Rescued One]

Fighting it is a tiresome job. My son is 21 and autistic, didn't speak until the age of 10, so we've had many a battle of unnecessary battles! Ann, your post reminds me of my son. He was a climber and climbed on anything he (literally) could get both hands and feet on! LOL He's mellowed out ALOT now but when he was younger, there was no rest for the weary.

Yes! The climbing! That's what makes me feel slightly guilty for teaching Dwayne to climb.

My daughter taught special needs children before she became a specialist in teaching blind children.

 

[*LILAC]

I find this informative:
Chromosomal abnormality linked to autism disorders

A lot of information is helpful but I like to find reliable sources, and not having an M. D., I just ask myself if the information is plausible. I find it frustrating when the general public thinks they are experts on the topic.

I enjoy watching shows about various health topics and rare diseases.

Our psychiatrist actually mentioned abnormal chromosomes and we never tested for it. Many other things were mentioned as well and the most obvious was reactions to vaccinations. Plus, my son being premature. The list was long and we ended up playing it by ear and making decisions for him as time progressed. But he was a great doctor, non-argumentative and very understanding and supportive. In fact, we had a whole team and they were all exceptionally great! Our son's outgrown alot of services now but we really couldn't complain about it then.

And yes, it is extremely frustrating when the general public like so and so has a friend who has an autistic son or daughter and their story is blah, blah, blah... I know there are some who try to relate while others just like to hear the sound of their own voice!

 

[Dave-W]

My oldest grandaughter was diagnosed as Aspie a few years ago. My daughter gave me this book to read. I found it very helpful.

Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger's: John Elder Robison: 8601419977581: Amazon.com: Books