• The General Mental Health Forum is now a Read Only Forum. As we had two large areas making it difficult for many to find, we decided to combine the Mental Health & the Recovery sections of the forum into Mental Health & Recovery as a whole. Physical Health still remains as it's own area within the entire Recovery area.

    If you are having struggles, need support in a particular area that you aren't finding a specific recovery area forum, you may find the General Struggles forum a great place to post. Any any that is related to emotions, self-esteem, insomnia, anger, relationship dynamics due to mental health and recovery and other issues that don't fit better in another forum would be examples of topics that might go there.

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Fear of Salvation

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I had a very unnerving experience this summer. A quick background on me, then I'll tell you what happened. I grew up in a fundamentalist church. Very hellfire and brimstone church. I was saved in my teens, but left my fundamentalist church in my 20s. In my church, I came to fear Jesus. Why? My pastor was always talking about Jesus telling people to "depart from me you accursed." Long story short, I became scared of Jesus. I'm in my 50s now. I tried to live the Christian life after leaving my fundamentalist church. I found myself drawn to God because he seemed friendly. However, I always felt nervous about Jesus because of the Hell verses. Tried my best to have a relationship with Jesus, but never quite connected. Which brings me to the current time. Earlier this summer, I was watching a YouTube video about a lady who had a vision of Jesus. It seemed very real. She told of how Jesus had shown to her that if people don't know him and don't let him fill the void in their heart, then he'd have to send them to Hell. In the vision, Jesus said to her that he'd be brokenhearted to send people away, but that he would have to do so if they didn't give their lives to him. This video struck a cord with me, as I realized that I had never made that commitment. To be honest, the video scared me more than anything has ever scared me. I have spent the last three months profusely repenting and asking Jesus to be my savior. Here is the tough part: the experience scared me so much, that I came down with severe anxiety and had to start taking medication. I had never had anxiety previously in my life. It can be crippling at times. As it stands, I have spent every day the last three months extremely worried about my salvation. I have read the Bible and prayed intensely during this time, asking Jesus for forgiveness and salvation. There have been times when the Bible has truly given me comfort, but I can't shake the fear I had when I first saw that video. I find myself doing everything I can to sincerely have a relationship with Jesus, but I'm scared. It's a horrible set of conflicting feelings to have. I don't know how to get out of this funk. I am in counseling, but I'm still dealing with this. Any help would be appreciated.
 

Tolworth John

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I find myself doing everything I can to sincerely have a relationship with Jesus, but I'm scared. It's a horrible set of conflicting feelings to have. I don't know how to get out of this funk. I am in counseling, but I'm still dealing with this. Any help would be appreciated.

I've only just found your post.
I'm sorry no one has responded to you, hopefully my late reply will help you.

A basic question. Do you attend church?
In your opinion what does the bible teach about becoming a Christian?

Do you believe what the bible says?
like in John3 :16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son

It says believe in Jesus, do you belief that what Jesus did will save you?

If you do start living as a Christian, attending church, reading the bible, praying for others etc etc etc.

May I suggest you read John6:. 37 All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40 For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

Trust in what Jesus has said he will do.
 
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GodsGrace101

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I had a very unnerving experience this summer. A quick background on me, then I'll tell you what happened. I grew up in a fundamentalist church. Very hellfire and brimstone church. I was saved in my teens, but left my fundamentalist church in my 20s. In my church, I came to fear Jesus. Why? My pastor was always talking about Jesus telling people to "depart from me you accursed." Long story short, I became scared of Jesus. I'm in my 50s now. I tried to live the Christian life after leaving my fundamentalist church. I found myself drawn to God because he seemed friendly. However, I always felt nervous about Jesus because of the Hell verses. Tried my best to have a relationship with Jesus, but never quite connected. Which brings me to the current time. Earlier this summer, I was watching a YouTube video about a lady who had a vision of Jesus. It seemed very real. She told of how Jesus had shown to her that if people don't know him and don't let him fill the void in their heart, then he'd have to send them to Hell. In the vision, Jesus said to her that he'd be brokenhearted to send people away, but that he would have to do so if they didn't give their lives to him. This video struck a cord with me, as I realized that I had never made that commitment. To be honest, the video scared me more than anything has ever scared me. I have spent the last three months profusely repenting and asking Jesus to be my savior. Here is the tough part: the experience scared me so much, that I came down with severe anxiety and had to start taking medication. I had never had anxiety previously in my life. It can be crippling at times. As it stands, I have spent every day the last three months extremely worried about my salvation. I have read the Bible and prayed intensely during this time, asking Jesus for forgiveness and salvation. There have been times when the Bible has truly given me comfort, but I can't shake the fear I had when I first saw that video. I find myself doing everything I can to sincerely have a relationship with Jesus, but I'm scared. It's a horrible set of conflicting feelings to have. I don't know how to get out of this funk. I am in counseling, but I'm still dealing with this. Any help would be appreciated.
Here's an easy answer for your problem P.
Is God Jesus?
Is Jesus God?
Yes.
Stop worrying and enjoy being a child of the creator of the universe.

God loves you.
If you believe in the Triniry,
You'll understand my point.
 
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Psalm 27

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I had a very unnerving experience this summer. A quick background on me, then I'll tell you what happened. I grew up in a fundamentalist church. Very hellfire and brimstone church. I was saved in my teens, but left my fundamentalist church in my 20s. In my church, I came to fear Jesus. Why? My pastor was always talking about Jesus telling people to "depart from me you accursed." Long story short, I became scared of Jesus. I'm in my 50s now. I tried to live the Christian life after leaving my fundamentalist church. I found myself drawn to God because he seemed friendly. However, I always felt nervous about Jesus because of the Hell verses. Tried my best to have a relationship with Jesus, but never quite connected. Which brings me to the current time. Earlier this summer, I was watching a YouTube video about a lady who had a vision of Jesus. It seemed very real. She told of how Jesus had shown to her that if people don't know him and don't let him fill the void in their heart, then he'd have to send them to Hell. In the vision, Jesus said to her that he'd be brokenhearted to send people away, but that he would have to do so if they didn't give their lives to him. This video struck a cord with me, as I realized that I had never made that commitment. To be honest, the video scared me more than anything has ever scared me. I have spent the last three months profusely repenting and asking Jesus to be my savior. Here is the tough part: the experience scared me so much, that I came down with severe anxiety and had to start taking medication. I had never had anxiety previously in my life. It can be crippling at times. As it stands, I have spent every day the last three months extremely worried about my salvation. I have read the Bible and prayed intensely during this time, asking Jesus for forgiveness and salvation. There have been times when the Bible has truly given me comfort, but I can't shake the fear I had when I first saw that video. I find myself doing everything I can to sincerely have a relationship with Jesus, but I'm scared. It's a horrible set of conflicting feelings to have. I don't know how to get out of this funk. I am in counseling, but I'm still dealing with this. Any help would be appreciated.
God bless you
Many say that they believe, but do we really?
Do we honestly believe that Jesus actually paid for our sins? That He rose from the dead? Rose into the clouds in acts 1? That He is equal with God?
That His mother was a virgin?
It's good to test ourselves, to question ourselves on these things. The Lord can deal with our questions and doubts. We should all pray about salvation, ask The Lord to reveal what we truly believe, and what we lack in faith.
When He answers, you will know, and your joy, no-one will take from you.
 
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I've only just found your post.
I'm sorry no one has responded to you, hopefully my late reply will help you.

A basic question. Do you attend church?
In your opinion what does the bible teach about becoming a Christian?

Do you believe what the bible says?
like in John3 :16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son

It says believe in Jesus, do you belief that what Jesus did will save you?

If you do start living as a Christian, attending church, reading the bible, praying for others etc etc etc.

May I suggest you read John6:. 37 All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40 For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

Trust in what Jesus has said he will do.
Thank you so much for your response. In the last few months, my relationship with Jesus has definitely improved.
 
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DialecticSkeptic

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Please, do yourself an eternally rewarding favor and read this book:
  • Jerry Bridges, Transforming Grace: Living Confidently in God's Unfailing Love (Colorado Springs: NavPress, 1991).
I promise, it will revolutionize your walk with God in Christ.
 
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YahuahSaves

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I had a very unnerving experience this summer. A quick background on me, then I'll tell you what happened. I grew up in a fundamentalist church. Very hellfire and brimstone church. I was saved in my teens, but left my fundamentalist church in my 20s. In my church, I came to fear Jesus. Why? My pastor was always talking about Jesus telling people to "depart from me you accursed." Long story short, I became scared of Jesus. I'm in my 50s now. I tried to live the Christian life after leaving my fundamentalist church. I found myself drawn to God because he seemed friendly. However, I always felt nervous about Jesus because of the Hell verses. Tried my best to have a relationship with Jesus, but never quite connected. Which brings me to the current time. Earlier this summer, I was watching a YouTube video about a lady who had a vision of Jesus. It seemed very real. She told of how Jesus had shown to her that if people don't know him and don't let him fill the void in their heart, then he'd have to send them to Hell. In the vision, Jesus said to her that he'd be brokenhearted to send people away, but that he would have to do so if they didn't give their lives to him. This video struck a cord with me, as I realized that I had never made that commitment. To be honest, the video scared me more than anything has ever scared me. I have spent the last three months profusely repenting and asking Jesus to be my savior. Here is the tough part: the experience scared me so much, that I came down with severe anxiety and had to start taking medication. I had never had anxiety previously in my life. It can be crippling at times. As it stands, I have spent every day the last three months extremely worried about my salvation. I have read the Bible and prayed intensely during this time, asking Jesus for forgiveness and salvation. There have been times when the Bible has truly given me comfort, but I can't shake the fear I had when I first saw that video. I find myself doing everything I can to sincerely have a relationship with Jesus, but I'm scared. It's a horrible set of conflicting feelings to have. I don't know how to get out of this funk. I am in counseling, but I'm still dealing with this. Any help would be appreciated.

Your post made me want to cry.
Fear is a crippling thing to deal with.
I also grew up in a church that talked about hell a lot and a works based salvation.
I also had an experience in my teens that further ingrained the belief that God was not happy with me and didn't love me.
Unfortunately we tend to view God through the very experiences we have in the world with people.
It's not to say he never gets angry at sin, but he is slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.
I would take a lot of videos on YouTube with a grain of salt, because there is a lot of deception out there and we need to exercise discernment.
That being said, I will share with you that I have had personal experiences with Jesus (not a vision) but he revealed himself in the spirit, after I cried out (in my heart) to God and after asking for forgiveness (being "saved") he has also spoken to me (not audibly, but in the spirit). He has a kindness like no kindness I've ever received from another human being. So kind, I still don't feel worthy of such kindness, and even when convicting me it's been because he doesn't want me to self-destruct. I'm still on a journey, he's still working things out in me, my biggest issue is trust because of my past and my skewed belief system. It's been a tough year and I still suffer from similar fears you speak of, but the more we push to renew our minds with the truth (the word), the more manageable those old triggers get.

God the Son (Jesus) is Good.

Hebrews 1:3

3 The Son radiates God’s own glory and expresses the very character of God, and he sustains everything by the mighty power of his command.
 
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