Exposure therapy

[marcb]

Hi all,

I have been encouraged by my psychologist and many of you to engage in "exposure therapy" in which the thoughts are either written down or allowed to "sit" and cause the anxiety. At that point relaxation becomes the focus. I have found this to open the flood gates, which I suppose is the goal, but it can be disturbing.

There have been days when the thoughts are fewer or occur as a faint whisper that I am hardly aware of. There are other days when they are constant and I try to do the best I can.

What bothers me the most is when I figure I should do more therapy (I tend to rush things), and I get into this "bring it on" mode. I did this yesterday, bringing out the thoughts, and the spike. I actually had to search my brain for them and force it. Then that "feeling" came back and I had to deal with it (try to ignore it) all day. I usually feel worse and my thoughts are more intense when I "break the peace." That can lead to some guilt over whether this is an appropriate tactic as it involves some voluntary engagement in "blasphemy". Although, interestingly, I don't know what thoughts will come out when I jump into it.

Have any of you who have done exposure therapy had similar experiences? Am I going about this in the right way?

 

[Jayangel81]

hey marcb,

i wouldnt exactly try to search for them. theyll find you

God knows that this is a way of therapy. He wants us to just ignore it, He has told me endless times to do just that. I too myself have forced it out. No matter what the key facter is trusting that God knows youre doing exposer/response

Cuz if you think youre volunteering these thoughts, youre gonna try to cancel them out again and ruin the exorcise. Hopefully you understand what i mean, im just waking up

God Bless!

brother, in Christ

 

[stacii]

I've had this happen to me also. I'm sorry that I'm not sure what the best answer is. I think they usually suggest trying to do the therapy at the same time every day for the same duration. Like every day at 8 p.m. you do the therapy for an hour. I haven't done it in a while (although I should start again) but I seem to remember that being the suggested method...

 

[ObsessedButBlessed]

Marc, I think you're on the right track. I do something similar with my in-home therapy, as well. Whenever I'm having a particularly bad day, I try my hardest just to let it sit there. I say to myself "I have anxiety, and I can live with it." It's SO hard not to reassure myself, but I stay farthest away from possible from the computer, because I know I will jump online for reassurance and that is just counter productive. Sometimes it feels like I'm fighting a huge wave of urge to give into reassurance, but if that's the case I just physicall remove myself from the house or the office or whatever until I feel that urge has passed. The point being, I CAN live with these thoughts and the anxiety. I CAN deal with this anxiety without trying to neutralize it.

While I don't have the blasphemy obsession, I do have the faith obsession, and I know that horrible sinking feeling when it feels like *I* I am responsible for my thoughts and doubts and fears about faith. That "If I think it, it must be true" feeling. At that point, I just give it up to God. What else can I do? It wasn't by my own faith or reasoning that I came to believe in the first place, so I certainly cannot find the one thought or feeling that will make all of this OCD stuff disappear on my own. So I just pray. Kaykay mentioned in a thread of mine just giving it up to God - just once - and then continuing on your day. Maybe that's counterproductive, I don't know, but I think that God is certainly aware of what we are going through and encourages us to "cast all of our cares upon him."

I think you're doing it right. Don't worry about whether or not you're voluntarily bringing on blasphemous thoughts - HELLOOOOO, that's OCD talking, friend!
Keep it up- you're doing great!!!

 

[marcb]

I think you're doing it right. Don't worry about whether or not you're voluntarily bringing on blasphemous thoughts - HELLOOOOO, that's OCD talking, friend!
Keep it up- you're doing great!!!

Good point! Thank you.