Explaining to my crush about my personality...

Evan Wright

Active Member
Oct 3, 2017
39
41
24
Mableton
✟15,619.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
So there is this girl that I've been going on dates with for the past 2 months now. We've been getting to know each other pretty well, and we have shared alot of deep things that I didn't know. We went in a dinner date to Red Lobster yesterday, and we had a really good time and shared with her a little bit about my personality. I told her that I often keep to myself alot and I don't think she really minded much, but there is much more to explain. She thinks I'm weird, but she still finds me interesting and what not. There's is alot more to my loner personality that I have to explain to her before we can date. How should I explain this to her? Also are there any other people with relationships where the boyfriend is a loner and the gf is more extroverted?
 

Evan Wright

Active Member
Oct 3, 2017
39
41
24
Mableton
✟15,619.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
do you see yourself as someone with Asperger's syndrome or as someone who is just introverted?

NOTE: these are NOT the same thing...at all.
I'm just introverted. I still speak to many people like classmates and strangers on a daily basis
 
Upvote 0

Evan Wright

Active Member
Oct 3, 2017
39
41
24
Mableton
✟15,619.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Which means you're gonna be more of a one on one person. Why do you classify yourself as a loner?
I keep to myself alot, I have a small circle, I am a bit awkward sometimes, and I like being my myself when I need to.
 
Upvote 0

S.O.J.I.A.

Dynamic UNO
Nov 6, 2016
4,280
2,641
Michigan
✟98,714.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian Seeker
Marital Status
Single
I keep to myself alot, I have a small circle, I am a bit awkward sometimes, and I like being my myself when I need to.
If you're introverted then you won't be comfortable around large crowds of people. Seems you get along socially within your own capacity and aren't socially inept. Just explain to your lady friend that you are more of a one on one person.
 
Upvote 0

Andrew77

The walking accident
Supporter
Feb 11, 2018
1,912
1,242
Ohio
✟138,616.00
Country
United States
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Constitution
So there is this girl that I've been going on dates with for the past 2 months now. We've been getting to know each other pretty well, and we have shared alot of deep things that I didn't know. We went in a dinner date to Red Lobster yesterday, and we had a really good time and shared with her a little bit about my personality. I told her that I often keep to myself alot and I don't think she really minded much, but there is much more to explain. She thinks I'm weird, but she still finds me interesting and what not. There's is alot more to my loner personality that I have to explain to her before we can date. How should I explain this to her? Also are there any other people with relationships where the boyfriend is a loner and the gf is more extroverted?

Why do you have to explain everything to her? Why does she have to know all this?

And I'm not hearing much about her in this post. You keep saying "She needs to understand me", and I'm not trying to be insulting, but do you see how self-centered that is? She needs to understand this about me, and that about me, and I need to explain my personality and me that and me this....

Do you hear how your post is reading? I'm not saying you are a narcissist, but I hope you can see from what you wrote, how it appears that way.

Introverts and extroverts having great and wonderful marriages happen all the time. In fact, it is less common to have two introverts, or two extroverts marry. More often "opposites attract" as the saying goes.

What never happens (or extremely rarely), is people that are entirely self-centered having a great marriage.

Nearly all women think men are weird, because we are. And nearly all men find women weird, because they are. We're different. That's how it goes.

I don't see any real problems here, and I think you should just move forward, but don't be all about you and how she needs to understand you.

How about you work more on trying to understand her? Learn more about the other person, and less about explaining all that is you, to her.
 
Upvote 0

Evan Wright

Active Member
Oct 3, 2017
39
41
24
Mableton
✟15,619.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Why do you have to explain everything to her? Why does she have to know all this?

And I'm not hearing much about her in this post. You keep saying "She needs to understand me", and I'm not trying to be insulting, but do you see how self-centered that is? She needs to understand this about me, and that about me, and I need to explain my personality and me that and me this....

Do you hear how your post is reading? I'm not saying you are a narcissist, but I hope you can see from what you wrote, how it appears that way.

Introverts and extroverts having great and wonderful marriages happen all the time. In fact, it is less common to have two introverts, or two extroverts marry. More often "opposites attract" as the saying goes.

What never happens (or extremely rarely), is people that are entirely self-centered having a great marriage.

Nearly all women think men are weird, because we are. And nearly all men find women weird, because they are. We're different. That's how it goes.

I don't see any real problems here, and I think you should just move forward, but don't be all about you and how she needs to understand you.

How about you work more on trying to understand her? Learn more about the other person, and less about explaining all that is you, to her.
I am working on trying to understand her I just don't think I soecifife it much in the post I'll work on not being so self-centred. Thanks for the advice brother(or sister)
 
Upvote 0