Dreams and Visions vs Family

[JassiKM]

I was once in a relationship for two years with the wrong man. He didn't treat me the way I deserved to be treated. For almost a year I stayed in prayer, close to God. I soaked in Pastor Joel Osteen. He said that since the bible says to ask and you shall recieve, then you must remind God of what you are asking since it is in his word. I asked for protection. I asked almost every day that the next man who enters my life would love and care for me and treat me the way I am supposed to be treated.

Then came Brandon. He was/is my everything. He made me feel special. But before things would get too far I prayed. God is this it? During an argument Brandon and I had in the beginning of our relationship (where I was afraid and contemplating running from him), I had a dream in which I was in an obstacle course. Each course I saw Brandon and tried to run away from him. I reached a wall that wasn't necessary for me to climb but I wanted to do so anyway. I was struggling. Brandon came to try and help me but once I fell Brandon suggested to just walk around it. I told him I wasn't. My pride wouldn't let me. Soon after a handsome man came and motivated me up the wall. He told me everything I wanted to hear. Then once we reached the top he pushed me over to my death.

I express that dream because there were many like it. Not with me dying of course but it would reveal an aspect of life in which Brandon was included. Even if a daydream I heard what I believe the voice of God saying I was supposed to be there for Brandon, as he was dealing with a lot of demons.

A year later after the dreams, Brandon has left me. He is lost and confused about himself and life and started a drug addiction. Last week he decided to be with someone who helps his addiction which runs in his family. They are both addicts. I also found out that Brandon was unfaithful during our year long relationship. My family, who are all in the church, say its over. They say our moment is done. But my dreams have said otherwise. I know God speaks through our dreams. I spoke to a deacon to interpret my one dream that I had with the obstacle course and he confirmed Brandon and I were to be. However my family is telling me that it is not God and that I am to move on. I feel it in my spirit that Brandon will return and it is my job to be his rock. I don't want to give up on him yet because I feel God doesn't want me to. Am I making a mistake?

 

[jacks]

In my humble opinion I would say yes waiting for Brandon is a mistake. It is definitely not your job to be his rock. Jesus is everyone's rock, everything else is a poor substitute. Move on.

 

[farout]

In my humble opinion I would say yes waiting for Brandon is a mistake. It is definitely not your job to be his rock. Jesus is everyone's rock, everything else is a poor substitute. Move on.

Biggest mistake is listening to Joel Osteen! His false teaching and "tickle my ears" theology is something to behold, sure is not Orthodox Christianity that's my humble opinion.

 

[dayhiker]

Hi Jass,
Welcome to CF. Hope you stick around.

A dream can help you but remember Paul and the words he got about going to Rome. Paul saw the visions as a way to prepare him for what he would face in
Rome. Other Christians saw the same messages as saying it would be wise to not even go to Rome. You can apply the dream what ever way you want.
God is in your life and as long as you live by faith and love God and people you will be fine.

I have no problem with you listening to Joel Osteen. Clearly God spoke to you thru his messages.

 

[JAM2b]

I have a lot of dreams, and often think they are subconscious issues my mind is trying to work out, things I don't want to deal with during my waking hours, or sometimes I do think it is a message from God. Regardless of the origin, they are almost always symbolic.

A person in a dream you know in real life, might not really be that person in the dream, but a representation of a type of person, a role someone could play, or even a situation rather than a person. I think it would be wise to not think of "Brandon" in that dream as the literal Brandon who you know, but as your mind's representation of what a loving, logical, and supportive partner could be like.

I think it is very important that you make careful, wise, well thought out, and intentional choices about Brandon. It is true that people can repent, change, be in recovery from addictions, etc. However it takes time. It also takes time to prove that the change and recovery is long lasting. It is OK to love someone from a distance and just observe. However, if he is involved with someone else, don't obsess over the fantasy of a future with him, especially considering his addiction. It could be they could break up and he could drop the addiction, and return to a relationship you. Or he might not.

Don't fixate on him. It is not healthy for you or for him. Be open to healthy relationships with others, and I don't mean romantic ones. You need time to get your head and heart right after the things you have been through. The worst treatment for healing your heart is to obsess over someone who isn't wanting you right now, or fall into a new relationship with someone else who might be just as broken, wounded, or self-serving. You are in no condition to make choices about romantic relationships at this time.

 

[JassiKM]

Thanks everyone for your replies, they really help. I will just pray and leave it in Gods hands. I will tell you that this has harmed my faith because I prayed for the right guy and then then I get so hurt, I am still crying some nights. I have an intense hole in my heart. Just waiting for time to allow me to overcome this situation. Thanks again!

 

[JAM2b]

Sometimes prayers aren't answered as quickly as we would like, and we jump the gun because we think we are seeing what we asked for, but we really aren't. Also when it comes to God answering prayers that involve other people you have to realize that people are imperfect and God doesn't force his will on anyone. Any "perfect one" is also a fallible human who susceptible to sin and weaknesses just like every other human on the planet. Don't confuse who God is with our earthly expectations of what he is "supposed" to do, or what humans will do.