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Divorce and remarriage

Discussion in 'Conservative Christianity' started by somuchjoy, Aug 2, 2019.

  1. somuchjoy

    somuchjoy New Member

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    So, I know this is a topic that is rampant in all forums. I have a hard time with how to reply to this myself. I am divorced, and not looking to be remarried, so it has no bearings on me. BUT, I do know couples who have come to believe and trust in Jesus as their Lord and Savior, and they do not know what to do because they have been divorced and remarried before knowing or caring what Jesus said on the matter. What if the "exception clause" is for the engagement period only? I want to be careful not to be deceived or deceive others who may ask. I know all sins will be forgiven but blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. What does one do in this case for true repentance? Thanks to everyone for a response!

    To clarify, I am divorced not of my doing. My husband wanted the divorce, and in America, what you want is what you will get, regardless of what the other wants.
     
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  2. Jonaitis

    Jonaitis Pilgrim

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    Yes, the "exception clause" is only for engagement period. If you were two were already married, there is no ground for divorce and your husband was in the wrong for that. Jesus said that as long as the two spouses remain alive, they are still united and married before the eyes of God regardless of a certificate of divorce. Only death parts the marriage. If you/him marry another person, you will be committing an act of adultery. "...whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery" (Matt. 5:32).

    It is a strong statement, but these are the words of our Savior. I do feel bad for those in such a situation, because really you have no control of it. But whatever God calls us in, we must accept it.
     
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  3. somuchjoy

    somuchjoy New Member

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    I agree completely. I have no desire to remarry. He has already remarried and has several children with his new wife. I cannot, in conscience, do that, because I know it is wrong. However, what about those who did it in ignorance? (my situation not being the reason for this question, because he did know it was wrong-or at least I showed him scripture and he chose not to believe).

    There are several couples in the church I go to that are currently remarried. Some know it was a sin to remarry, others think it was no sin. However, those that know it was sin, they do not know what to do. Do they divorce their current spouse and live single? Is it continuous adultery? If someone knowingly does it, is there any hope for true repentance? Thank you for your biblical response :)
     
  4. nanookadenord

    nanookadenord Well-Known Member

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    Edit: Nevermind. I didn't realize what sub-forum I was in.
     
  5. topher694

    topher694 Go Turtle!

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    This is always a hot topic. There's a good chance this thread will get crazy. :) But I'll say this:

    I believe this is one area where the church has majorly missed it... no matter how you come down on it. People get passionate about the issue and tend to not treat others as they would want to be treated. All while waving scripture in their faces. It's a complicated and emotional issue and we should never forget to treat people with dignity and respect regardless of our theology.
     
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  6. somuchjoy

    somuchjoy New Member

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    Absolutely! I feel as Christians, we should discuss things with love and respect. Because although this may not be a sore subject for me, it is others and the last thing I want to do is be insensitive. Everything should be done in love. I think that the majority of churches have absolutely neglected this. Even last night at my own church, we studied from Matthew 19 and 20, but divorce was only mentioned ONE time in the whole sermon. He glossed over it and simply said that after Jesus gave his teaching on divorce, he spoke with children. It is hard for me when a couple comes up and says that they were remarried before they were saved and didn't know what Jesus had taught. I have had a woman break down on her knees and cry because she married a man that is divorced and she is afraid she is living in constant sin. I have failed too. I should be going out and teaching on this also!
     
  7. Andrewn

    Andrewn Well-Known Member CF Ambassadors Supporter

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    Remarriage is _not_ an unforgivable sin.
     
  8. somuchjoy

    somuchjoy New Member

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    I agree! Thank God for his precious son that we have a chance to live forever with Him! I guess my question is, what shows true repentance? And how can you approach a teaching like this with love?
     
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  9. Dave-W

    Dave-W Welcoming grandchild #7, Arturus Waggoner! Supporter

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    I do not see you have anything to repent from.

    You did not sin in this; you were sinned against.
     
  10. nanookadenord

    nanookadenord Well-Known Member

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    I too was divorced against my will by my ex-wife.

    I basically repented of my part that led to the divorce as I couldn't make her happy. Then I prayed that if it was God's will that He would bring to me the woman He wants me to be with that would bring Him glory and He sent me my current girlfriend, she too is divorced, but her ex cheated on her repeatedly. She also prayed that she would meet the man that God had for her.

    This is the best relationship that I have ever been in. There is no doubt that this is from God.

    As for approach this teaching with love? I'm not really sure.
     
  11. ~Zao~

    ~Zao~ Wisdom’s child Supporter

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    It’s a testing of God upon law that was not originally supplied by God, but thru a man named Moses. Christ stated such and returned it to a place of God’s original intention of one man and one woman becoming one flesh. The one man is Christ and believers are the one woman. That is the formula for Christ and the church which marriage is a shadow of. Adultery, especially spiritual adultery, is a serious thing. The marriage can be only broken thru death, so death of the old nature is crucial.
     
  12. somuchjoy

    somuchjoy New Member

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    Thank you! I have repented for anything that I may have done, unknowingly, that would have caused our marriage to fail. I was wondering more for when someone asks me about this particular thing. I am not old in Christ. I have been saved actually for a short period as opposed to many in my church. I have had a couple of women ask me how they repent from their remarriage. They do not know what to do in this situation. Of course, I have told them to pray. One believes she has to leave this marriage and remain single. The other is simply unsure. Thank you for your response!
     
  13. somuchjoy

    somuchjoy New Member

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    Divorce is a hard thing to deal with in any case! Thank you for your insight!
     
  14. Dave-W

    Dave-W Welcoming grandchild #7, Arturus Waggoner! Supporter

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    Be careful on that. Moses only wrote what God told him to. You are making it sound like Moses contradicted God on this issue.
    HE was referring to man before the fall.
     
  15. Andrewn

    Andrewn Well-Known Member CF Ambassadors Supporter

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    I don't usually quote long sections from the Bible but here is the whole context from Mat 5. Do you understand what the Lord Jesus is saying?

    27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away; it is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away; it is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to go into hell. 31 “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I say to you that anyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of unchastity, causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

    Did you pluck out your right eye and cut off your right hand? Or have you always been sinless?
     
  16. somuchjoy

    somuchjoy New Member

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    Thank you for your response! I will not remarry because of this. I also still love my husband, no matter what. It can be a hard thing but I am thankful I have Jesus. This one particular woman in my church believes to repent from her remarriage she much divorce the current one she is with. I do not want to be insensitive, but also want to make sure I am standing on the Bible, and not my emotions, if that makes sense?
     
  17. ~Zao~

    ~Zao~ Wisdom’s child Supporter

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    Is hardness of heart something supplied by God? That would make Pharaoh innocent.
     
  18. Jonaitis

    Jonaitis Pilgrim

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    If they remarried in ignorance, they should remained married. No sense in divorcing twice, that doesn't fix it. I know several married couples who divorced their former spouses before they married. I would say two wrongs do not make a right.
     
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  19. Jonaitis

    Jonaitis Pilgrim

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    What is your contention? I'm lost...
     
  20. Dave-W

    Dave-W Welcoming grandchild #7, Arturus Waggoner! Supporter

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    Exodus 7:3
    But I will harden Pharaoh’s heart that I may multiply My signs and My wonders in the land of Egypt.

    And no - he was NOT innocent.
     
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