Difficulty Worshiping in Church

[nermal]

Is it normal to find it difficult to worship in a church setting? I find it easy to enter into worship when I'm alone or when I'm in an environment like a summer camp or a youth retreat or such. But in a church environment, it just seems so foreign, regardless of the musical style or size or type of church. I really want to be able to worship in church, but I can't seem to do anything more than do my best to sing along and try to keep my mind from wandering. I'm thinking it might be partially because I grew up in a church where only the choir really did any singing and the congregation just sat/stood and listened so I didn't really grow up associating church with worship. And yes, I know that worship doesn't have to be synonymous with singing and many things can be forms of worship but I am specifically referring to worship while singing in this post.

 

[anna ~ grace]

So..... the times when I have been to contemporary worship services with strobe lights, praise and worship songs, and a band on stage, I can't associate this with worship to save my life. I have tried. But it's noisy, showy, too dark, and I'm not 100% sure about a lot of the theology of the songs I'm singing.

I just try to pray in my head as this goes on; not sing along. Just get my own prayer time going in my head, which is relevant to me.

 

[Carl Emerson]

Yep, the modern church style has little interest in the seniors. The service to me is like being on a platform and watching a train go by...

 

[Albion]

Is it normal to find it difficult to worship in a church setting? I find it easy to enter into worship when I'm alone or when I'm in an environment like a summer camp or a youth retreat or such. But in a church environment, it just seems so foreign, regardless of the musical style or size or type of church. I really want to be able to worship in church, but I can't seem to do anything more than do my best to sing along and try to keep my mind from wandering. I'm thinking it might be partially because I grew up in a church where only the choir really did any singing and the congregation just sat/stood and listened so I didn't really grow up associating church with worship. And yes, I know that worship doesn't have to be synonymous with singing and many things can be forms of worship but I am specifically referring to worship while singing in this post.

There are many different styles of corporate worship to be found among Christian denominations...and even within a single denomination.

The problem you describe is not unusual, and it might be solved by you looking around a bit to see what other worship opportunities are available to you.

Sometimes people find a service conducted in a military chapel or a monastery or with a denomination that is known for quiet contemplative corporate worship (Quakers, for instance). Anyway, the possibilities do exist.

 

[Carl Emerson]

There are many different styles of corporate worship to be found among Christian denominations...and even within a single denomination.

The problem you describe is not unusual, and it might be solved by you looking around a bit to see what other worship opportunities are available to you.

Sometimes people find a service conducted in a military chapel or a monastery or with a denomination that is known for quiet contemplative corporate worship (Quakers, for instance). Anyway, the possibilities do exist.

Yes I agree, however we have started our own home fellowship at this stage.

 

[Albion]

Yes I agree, however we have started our own home fellowship at this stage.

...which IMHO is the choice if all else has failed. It doesn't appear that our friend has reached that point yet.

Nermal, to settle for a home fellowship means to do without much in the way of fellowship or gathering together in the Scriptural sense; it means doing without the sacraments Our Lord commanded us to observe; and it means doing without a trained pastoral counselor and preacher. There are exceptions, to be sure, with one or two of those points, but this is what it most often means.

 

[Carl Emerson]

...which IMHO is the choice if all else has failed. It doesn't appear that our friend has reached that point yet.

I don't think it is a matter of being guided by failure.

If I was guided to any church I would be there in a flash.

His purposes are much greater than our wants.

 

[lismore]

Hi nermal. Maybe it will just take time, if it's a new worship style for you. Hang in there, things will improve with time as you become more familiar with it. God Bless

 

[TraceMalin]

I stopped going to church during a period of my life when I was living in sin. I never rejected God and had a relationship with Him in nature, where I've always felt His presence stronger than in church. Our own Christian images show us clouds and sunsets and the cross instead of pulpits when trying to inspire us. I felt like a hypocrite when I did enter a church. That's probably where I needed to be. When I went back to church, I no longer recognized it. I grew up Methodist and Presbyterian. The Methodist minister was in jeans (too casual) and ... female! It was just culture shock. Only about 10 people were in the pews. Combined, it was just too foreign for the return to God's house I needed to feel as a prodigal son. The Presbyterian church also supported LGBT rights and same-sex unions. Geez! Had I known that, I'd just keep being adulterous. I graduated from a Catholic college and went to mass a few times back then. My girlfriend and I go to Catholic mass since she's Catholic. When I'm in a Catholic church I feel more connected to God. The traditional setting makes me feel comfortable and the history seems to unfold within the walls connecting me with Rome, the ancient world, and to the beginning of our story.

 

[jisaiah6113]

You don't have to conform 100% to the worship experience of your church. Obviously, that is the ideal, because if everyone is on a different page while the same worship is going on, then everyone is sort of disconnected from each other and emotionally in their own world. But I can't conform entirely to any communal worship experience I have experienced, unfortunately.

In evangelical churches, the emphasis on personal worship in a communal setting with love songs for the Lord with some people worshiping God with expression while others fold their arms makes me uncomfortable. I feel that whether I am lifting my hands or being gestureless I am being judged. Most of that is the devil trying to distract me, but it's still there. So I spend most of the time wondering what other people are thinking of me rather than worshiping God.

In the Catholic church, I find the actual words of the Mass not very inspiring and very mechanical, so instead of following along with the chants and responses, I just start (silently) thanking God for my week and for all the things I feel blessed to have. And I feel that garners a greater blessing than just mindlessly repeating something that some bishop 70 years ago said we should repeat in unison.

In the Coptic Orthodox church where I now attend, the words are largely the same for each liturgy but depend on the occasion and time of year. We say things like "bless the crown of the year" and other phrases sung communally which make little sense to me so once again I try to get in touch with God in a way that works for me. I sing along with words that make sense to me and the rest I discard. Unfortunately, I haven't found a perfect worship experience on Earth, although Divine Liturgy comes close.