Devotion for Couples

[tericl2]

Avoiding Emotional Adultery

It is far easier to commit emotional adultery than you may realize. You may be converging on a chemical reaction with another person when:


You've got a need you feel your mate isn't meeting-a need for attention, approval or affection, for example.

You find it easier to unwind with someone other than your spouse by dissecting the day's difficulties over lunch, coffee or a ride home.

You begin to talk about problems you are having with your spouse.

You rationalize the propriety of this relationship with the opposite sex by saying that surely it must be God's will to talk so openly and honestly with a fellow Christian.

You look forward to being with this person more than with your own mate.

You hide the relationship from your mate.

When you find yourself connecting with another person as a substitute, you've started traveling a road that ends too often in adultery and divorce. But how do you protect yourself to keep this from occurring?

Know your boundaries. You should put fences around your heart that protect sacred ground, reserved only for your spouse. Barbara and I are careful to share our deepest feelings, needs and difficulties with each other, and not with friends of the opposite sex.

Realize the power of your eyes. As has been said, your eyes are the windows to your heart. Pull the shades down if you sense someone is pausing a little too long in front of your windows.

Beware of isolation and concealment. One strategy of the enemy is to isolate you from your spouse, especially by inducing you to keep secrets from your mate.

Extinguish chemical reactions that have already begun. A friendship with the opposite sex that meets the needs your mate should be meeting must be ended quickly. It may be a painful loss at first, but it isn't as painful as dealing with the wreckage caused by a sinful relationship.



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Discuss: What barriers can you observe to avoid dangerous chemical reactions?
Pray: Daily that God would "keep you from stumbling."


copied from www.familylife.com

 

[ZiSunka]

Another good thing to do is to play out in your mind what will happen if you do cheat or divorce. Sure, it seems lovely at first, you'll get to be with the person who makes your heart flutter, but you'll also have to live with the knowledge that that person broke his own marriage and broke up yours, too, meaning that marriage isn't very valuable to him/her. Then you'll have to deal with his/her family's resentments against you at holidays and family events. Then you'll have to wonder if he/she is being faithful to you, since they were unfaithful to their first spouse, and so on...

Once you start going down that road, all the hurts and sufferings caused by it become very clearly undesirable. You'd be surprised by the number of times I have been able to use this to drive away temptation!

Think about the real consequences, and that guy/girl starts to look pretty ugly!

 

[solo66 man]

A rule even Billy Graham lives by and I try to adhere to is never be alone with a person of the opposite sex, even with his secretary.
An over simplification, but lethal against the enemy none-the-less.

 

[sleepingbeautylizzie]

hello

 

[FFX]

And praying with each other as a couple on a daily basis helps too!! Remember we are fighting in spirit too! When we realise this too, it may help us in identifying and stopping the temptations before they start. So remember we are not fighting against flesh and blood but we are fighting a spiritual warefare!! Remember, Satan is out to steal, kill and destroy...





Hey Sleepingbeautylizzie ... how are you? and do you mind if I call you liz for short?