Depressed and Directionless

[starryshadows]

Please pray for me. Lately, I've been struggling with depression most days. I often feel directionless and purposeless. Right now I just graduated from college and have been applying to jobs for awhile now. I think the change from college to not having a goal is contributing to my depression. I now don't know where I'm going, or what God wants me to do. I often get stuck thinking about my failures in the past, and I worry that maybe God can't use me because of my weaknesses. I often feel angry and frustrated (and some of this is directed at my parents, then at myself). I know my anger is wrong, but I feel like I'm frustrated and irritable all the time. I try to get my anger under control, but then I fail and feel like I'm in a cycle. I want to know God more but I feel like I'm not doing enough to do that. I pray and read my Bible daily, but I want more. I am not satisfied with just a rote reading of the Bible; I want to actually be close to God. But I also rarely make more time during the day. I'm angry at myself for that. I'm confused at what God wants me to do. I wish I could hear Him better. I often wish I were a different person. I feel like I am a failure so much. I'm worried I disappoint God. I want to love Him, but I often think my "love" isn't enough. I want to be filled with love for God and others but I don't know how. Please pray for me. I'm really struggling. Thank you and God bless you.

 

[Mydreams]

Father God bless starryshadows and this prayer request. Lord you know everything, please help and bless starryshadows, in this matters, in Jesus name, Amen!

 

[starryshadows]

Father God bless starryshadows and this prayer request. Lord you know everything, please help and bless starryshadows, in this matters, in Jesus name, Amen!

Thank you Mydreams.

Thank you everyone so much for your prayers.

 

[God is good]

Thank you Mydreams.

Thank you everyone so much for your prayers.

God really loves you and the fact that you read your Bible everyday and you saying that you want to be close to God, I'm sure that makes Him happy. Remember, it's only because of Jesus that we are right with God and as long as He is truly your Lord and Saviour you are good. God bless you and Jesus is Lord. You can message me anytime you want to.

 

[Carl Emerson]

Please pray for me. Lately, I've been struggling with depression most days. I often feel directionless and purposeless. Right now I just graduated from college and have been applying to jobs for awhile now. I think the change from college to not having a goal is contributing to my depression. I now don't know where I'm going, or what God wants me to do. I often get stuck thinking about my failures in the past, and I worry that maybe God can't use me because of my weaknesses. I often feel angry and frustrated (and some of this is directed at my parents, then at myself). I know my anger is wrong, but I feel like I'm frustrated and irritable all the time. I try to get my anger under control, but then I fail and feel like I'm in a cycle. I want to know God more but I feel like I'm not doing enough to do that. I pray and read my Bible daily, but I want more. I am not satisfied with just a rote reading of the Bible; I want to actually be close to God. But I also rarely make more time during the day. I'm angry at myself for that. I'm confused at what God wants me to do. I wish I could hear Him better. I often wish I were a different person. I feel like I am a failure so much. I'm worried I disappoint God. I want to love Him, but I often think my "love" isn't enough. I want to be filled with love for God and others but I don't know how. Please pray for me. I'm really struggling. Thank you and God bless you.

You wrote such a beautiful poem... Try and keep things simple and don't be too hard on yourself. With such a passion for Him He certainly has your attention and will lead you in the right way.

Give him permission to take over your life completely. Total commitment is nothing to be afraid of because it simply allows Him to establish order in your life.

Sometime I pray Lord take me by the ankles and walk me in the right way despite myself.

Every day I would pray Lord give me this day the desires to do your will and the grace to be obedient.

 

[ChicanaRose]

Please pray for me. I'm really struggling. Thank you and God bless you.

This breaks my heart because you are always cordial towards everyone on here (and that's a gift). May God fill you with comfort. May He make His presence so real to you, and revive your body, mind, and spirit.

 

[mukk_in]

Please pray for me. Lately, I've been struggling with depression most days. I often feel directionless and purposeless. Right now I just graduated from college and have been applying to jobs for awhile now. I think the change from college to not having a goal is contributing to my depression. I now don't know where I'm going, or what God wants me to do. I often get stuck thinking about my failures in the past, and I worry that maybe God can't use me because of my weaknesses. I often feel angry and frustrated (and some of this is directed at my parents, then at myself). I know my anger is wrong, but I feel like I'm frustrated and irritable all the time. I try to get my anger under control, but then I fail and feel like I'm in a cycle. I want to know God more but I feel like I'm not doing enough to do that. I pray and read my Bible daily, but I want more. I am not satisfied with just a rote reading of the Bible; I want to actually be close to God. But I also rarely make more time during the day. I'm angry at myself for that. I'm confused at what God wants me to do. I wish I could hear Him better. I often wish I were a different person. I feel like I am a failure so much. I'm worried I disappoint God. I want to love Him, but I often think my "love" isn't enough. I want to be filled with love for God and others but I don't know how. Please pray for me. I'm really struggling. Thank you and God bless you.

We have all struggled with anger starryshadows. Your passion for God is also amazing. Don't be frustrated because God knows the plans He has for you (Jeremiah 29:11) and He'll fulfill them. Spiritual maturity will come in time. Just enjoy your walk with God. Remember, it's a walk with God not a sprint (Genesis 5:21-24) .

 

[ajcarey]

I doubt it's possible to really love God and seek Him in truth without going through some times like you are going through. You want to love God more and serve Him better. Trust that God sees the desire of your heart and He has great intentions for you and good reasons for having you in your current circumstances. It's important to learn to trust Him when there are clouds above us and sight tells us to doubt. From everything I've seen you write I believe you really do want to please Him above all else and you are getting a learning opportunity in your current confusion to learn to trust Him deeper. Let patience have its perfect work and you will come out of this more useful to Him, and you're rejoicing in Him will be greater and harder to shake. He doesn't require more of you than to heed His Word and to walk in the truth that you do understand and are able to carry out. He wants you to succeed in doing His will more than anyone and He is there to have mercy on you and help you as you yield to Him and depend on Him. The darkest days do not change this.

"Who is among you that feareth the Lord, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the Lord, and stay upon his God." (Isaiah 50:10)

"Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our profession. For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need." (Hebrews 4:14-16)

 

[Vicky gould]

Please pray for me. Lately, I've been struggling with depression most days. I often feel directionless and purposeless. Right now I just graduated from college and have been applying to jobs for awhile now. I think the change from college to not having a goal is contributing to my depression. I now don't know where I'm going, or what God wants me to do. I often get stuck thinking about my failures in the past, and I worry that maybe God can't use me because of my weaknesses. I often feel angry and frustrated (and some of this is directed at my parents, then at myself). I know my anger is wrong, but I feel like I'm frustrated and irritable all the time. I try to get my anger under control, but then I fail and feel like I'm in a cycle. I want to know God more but I feel like I'm not doing enough to do that. I pray and read my Bible daily, but I want more. I am not satisfied with just a rote reading of the Bible; I want to actually be close to God. But I also rarely make more time during the day. I'm angry at myself for that. I'm confused at what God wants me to do. I wish I could hear Him better. I often wish I were a different person. I feel like I am a failure so much. I'm worried I disappoint God. I want to love Him, but I often think my "love" isn't enough. I want to be filled with love for God and others but I don't know how. Please pray for me. I'm really struggling. Thank you and God bless you.

Hi starry, before I pray online I have begun to do so as I read and a few things came into my heart. These is a great bible study that I think can be found on youtube and its called "stuck" I am not sure why the Lord might have wanted this mentioned, oh yeah the Stuck thing no I get it. Do you know how many people who were just the leaders of His people were stuck? All of them so at least your in good company so far. Please if you have not listened to Big Daddy Weave sing "I am redeemed" please do and if you have play it enough to get etched in your heart especially all the parts that apply to folks like you and I failures and all the rest.

A pastor took his youth group and had them form a circle in the middle he placed a young girl and blindfolded her gave her ball and told she would only have once chance to hit the target then the group started chanting for her to hit the target but she did not know what the target is, what direction, would one of the kids in the circle get hit and doubts and anger and all kinds of negative things overflowed from her. Goals are much needed. But some times the goal has to be still and KNOW He is God. Paul 13 years the Lord prepared him for His service that giant of faith Moses only needed 40 years to be prepared. By the way when the Lord brought Moses back the first job he gave him was to get Pharaoh to let the Lord's people go to worship God. Moses who had been dreaming of freeing his fellow Israelites must have been ecstatic right up until the Lord said Pharaoh was not going to do so that he was being sent on a human viewpoint was a failure a fool's journey. Think Moses would have been prepared for this is God had not taught what serving God would be like if Moses was to tend the Lord's flock. Oh yes. The added benefit in all this was not only would Moses have failed before he ever began but the plight of the people would worsen because of what Moses was doing trying free them. The Lord who always works on all ends was preparing Moses for dealing with human sheep who are a lot more difficult to handle or understand. He was working on Pharaoh for the time that God would be glorified because of his rebellion against the Lord. Th Lord was working on the people of Israel to be shepherded by the one they had already rejected, Moses. The Lord is working on you, your situation and everyone between, just like He did with Moses. Waited a minute I thought you were just a recently graduated college kid who ls this God does for Moses just like He does you? You must be someone important God's a pretty busy guy you know.

One last thing. I you find sometime you have a few minutes to be still knowing He is God give a read of Romans 8 and Hebrews 11 and 12. Romans 8 until you know it word for word but more importantly until you believe it. Once you believe it and won't forget it you're ready to serve him wherever He takes you. Read Hebrews 11-12 while you wait on because all things in His time. You will find in Hebrews 11 a list of the faithful and the things they did. This is how you are saved by Faith now what? The Lord talks to us in how athletes are coached and trained to run the race. The Lord asks if we would let Him train us for the race a race we are told the Lord Himself has not only run Himself He laid out the entire course and the Lord runs the race with you. These things in Scripture are metaphors for our lives and the journey we are presently running. Allow Him to train nd run it with you and He promises you to bring forth a harvest full of righteousness from your life.

Lord you are Holy, faithful and merciful and I ask you to hear this prayer. You have raised each of us for the express purpose to glorify you you as you in turn are glorified by the Father and bring Glory to the Father. You have in your great love and mercy have allowed us to share in something so profound the words that could truly make this known to us would fail because as you have told us the things you have prepared for you children unable to be grasped while we still dwell in the flesh but we will not always be in our flesh. Even so come Lord Jesus. Lord we know that you did not place this child who has accepted your free gift of faith and with it your Holy and Righteous Son. Now Lord comes what can often be the most difficult part like Moses wanting to free the children but to free them before it is your time to come out with them and would be even worse to send someone created and sent into this world not being prepared to accomplish that very call upon our but You Lord know exactly what we need when we need and where we glorify you with. let us see you not by sight but faith. amen

 

[Daniel Marsh]

Please pray for me. Lately, I've been struggling with depression most days. I often feel directionless and purposeless. Right now I just graduated from college and have been applying to jobs for awhile now. I think the change from college to not having a goal is contributing to my depression. I now don't know where I'm going, or what God wants me to do. I often get stuck thinking about my failures in the past, and I worry that maybe God can't use me because of my weaknesses. I often feel angry and frustrated (and some of this is directed at my parents, then at myself). I know my anger is wrong, but I feel like I'm frustrated and irritable all the time. I try to get my anger under control, but then I fail and feel like I'm in a cycle. I want to know God more but I feel like I'm not doing enough to do that. I pray and read my Bible daily, but I want more. I am not satisfied with just a rote reading of the Bible; I want to actually be close to God. But I also rarely make more time during the day. I'm angry at myself for that. I'm confused at what God wants me to do. I wish I could hear Him better. I often wish I were a different person. I feel like I am a failure so much. I'm worried I disappoint God. I want to love Him, but I often think my "love" isn't enough. I want to be filled with love for God and others but I don't know how. Please pray for me. I'm really struggling. Thank you and God bless you.

I am praying for you.

sign up on Indeed, go to head hunting places like Express Pro

Increase your networking circle by using Social Media and other Job search places.

A big key is that Networking. Call anyone you ever knew.

What is your degree in? Join related groups and unions.

Go to the Unemployment Offices in your area.

Network at Church, hand out Business cards.

Run a newspaper ad. Send a short description of yourself to all possible media, print and online.

Your College will have leads too.

 

[Aussie Pete]

Please pray for me. Lately, I've been struggling with depression most days. I often feel directionless and purposeless. Right now I just graduated from college and have been applying to jobs for awhile now. I think the change from college to not having a goal is contributing to my depression. I now don't know where I'm going, or what God wants me to do. I often get stuck thinking about my failures in the past, and I worry that maybe God can't use me because of my weaknesses. I often feel angry and frustrated (and some of this is directed at my parents, then at myself). I know my anger is wrong, but I feel like I'm frustrated and irritable all the time. I try to get my anger under control, but then I fail and feel like I'm in a cycle. I want to know God more but I feel like I'm not doing enough to do that. I pray and read my Bible daily, but I want more. I am not satisfied with just a rote reading of the Bible; I want to actually be close to God. But I also rarely make more time during the day. I'm angry at myself for that. I'm confused at what God wants me to do. I wish I could hear Him better. I often wish I were a different person. I feel like I am a failure so much. I'm worried I disappoint God. I want to love Him, but I often think my "love" isn't enough. I want to be filled with love for God and others but I don't know how. Please pray for me. I'm really struggling. Thank you and God bless you.

May I suggest that you quit worrying about what you are and are not and look to Jesus? If you are born again, you are a new creation. Lord Jesus is your life now. I can assure you that God is satisfied with Him! Don't "try" to love God with your love. God's love is shed abroad in your heart by the Holy Spirit. You can love God with the love that He puts in your heart. Cast all your care on God. Then leave it there! He cares for you more than you can begin to understand - no one truly understands God's love. God loves you just as you are, but He wants to set you free from those things that burden you. The best prayer in your situation (as I have found out by experience) is "HELP!"
You do not have to live in the past. When God forgives, He forgets. The Blood of Christ removes sin as if it never happened. Once you've confessed, God forgives.

 

[Greg Merrill]

Father, may such people, regardless of their situations, and in addition to what ever their lot in life may be, may they find joy and purpose in focusing on getting to know You and Your Word very well, and responding to this knowledge in the way You would have them respond. "Tis only one life, and soon will be past, and only what's done for Christ will last."

 

[starryshadows]

God really loves you and the fact that you read your Bible everyday and you saying that you want to be close to God, I'm sure that makes Him happy. Remember, it's only because of Jesus that we are right with God and as long as He is truly your Lord and Saviour you are good. God bless you and Jesus is Lord. You can message me anytime you want to.

Thank you so much God is good! God bless you too.

 

[starryshadows]

You wrote such a beautiful poem... Try and keep things simple and don't be too hard on yourself. With such a passion for Him He certainly has your attention and will lead you in the right way.

Give him permission to take over your life completely. Total commitment is nothing to be afraid of because it simply allows Him to establish order in your life.

Sometime I pray Lord take me by the ankles and walk me in the right way despite myself.

Every day I would pray Lord give me this day the desires to do your will and the grace to be obedient.

Thank you Carl Emerson for your kind encouragement. This really helps me, especially the part about complete commitment and giving up control to Jesus. I like your prayer to "take you by the ankles" haha. that is a good prayer. Thank you, I will pray for God to give me grace to obey Him. It helps me to hear this kind of encouragement and know I'm not alone. I get so confused sometimes, but I know that God has never left me, and He has shown me so much mercy. He is so good to me.

 

[starryshadows]

This breaks my heart because you are always cordial towards everyone on here (and that's a gift). May God fill you with comfort. May He make His presence so real to you, and revive your body, mind, and spirit.

Thank you, you are so kind to say that. I have always noticed your kind way of speaking to people too. Thank you so much for your prayers, and God bless you!

 

[starryshadows]

We have all struggled with anger starryshadows. Your passion for God is also amazing. Don't be frustrated because God knows the plans He has for you (Jeremiah 29:11) and He'll fulfill them. Spiritual maturity will come in time. Just enjoy your walk with God. Remember, it's a walk with God not a sprint (Genesis 5:21-24) .

Thank you so much. That verse is so comforting to me, especially when I get afraid about "how can God use me?" It's amazing to think that He chose me and has a purpose for me. Thank you for your encouragement.

 

[starryshadows]

I doubt it's possible to really love God and seek Him in truth without going through some times like you are going through. You want to love God more and serve Him better. Trust that God sees the desire of your heart and He has great intentions for you and good reasons for having you in your current circumstances. It's important to learn to trust Him when there are clouds above us and sight tells us to doubt. From everything I've seen you write I believe you really do want to please Him above all else and you are getting a learning opportunity in your current confusion to learn to trust Him deeper. Let patience have its perfect work and you will come out of this more useful to Him, and you're rejoicing in Him will be greater and harder to shake. He doesn't require more of you than to heed His Word and to walk in the truth that you do understand and are able to carry out. He wants you to succeed in doing His will more than anyone and He is there to have mercy on you and help you as you yield to Him and depend on Him. The darkest days do not change this.

"Who is among you that feareth the Lord, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the Lord, and stay upon his God." (Isaiah 50:10)

"Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our profession. For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need." (Hebrews 4:14-16)

Wow, thank you! Your encouragement really is helpful to me. I read your messages (everyone) and I've been thinking about them today. What you said about how God may have a reason for letting me be in this situation and Him using it to teach me to trust Him better really struck me. Somehow I seem to forget that everything I go through has a purpose in God's plan, even when it seems like nothing is going on, and I'm just confused. Maybe He's trying to get me to trust Him when I don't understand. On days when I have felt especially depressed, I find I'm more desperate for God's presence and I have found that a verse or a remembrance of His love and faithfulness have really comforted me through that. I love that verse from Isaiah! Thank you so much!

 

[starryshadows]

Hi starry, before I pray online I have begun to do so as I read and a few things came into my heart. These is a great bible study that I think can be found on youtube and its called "stuck" I am not sure why the Lord might have wanted this mentioned, oh yeah the Stuck thing no I get it. Do you know how many people who were just the leaders of His people were stuck? All of them so at least your in good company so far. Please if you have not listened to Big Daddy Weave sing "I am redeemed" please do and if you have play it enough to get etched in your heart especially all the parts that apply to folks like you and I failures and all the rest.

A pastor took his youth group and had them form a circle in the middle he placed a young girl and blindfolded her gave her ball and told she would only have once chance to hit the target then the group started chanting for her to hit the target but she did not know what the target is, what direction, would one of the kids in the circle get hit and doubts and anger and all kinds of negative things overflowed from her. Goals are much needed. But some times the goal has to be still and KNOW He is God. Paul 13 years the Lord prepared him for His service that giant of faith Moses only needed 40 years to be prepared. By the way when the Lord brought Moses back the first job he gave him was to get Pharaoh to let the Lord's people go to worship God. Moses who had been dreaming of freeing his fellow Israelites must have been ecstatic right up until the Lord said Pharaoh was not going to do so that he was being sent on a human viewpoint was a failure a fool's journey. Think Moses would have been prepared for this is God had not taught what serving God would be like if Moses was to tend the Lord's flock. Oh yes. The added benefit in all this was not only would Moses have failed before he ever began but the plight of the people would worsen because of what Moses was doing trying free them. The Lord who always works on all ends was preparing Moses for dealing with human sheep who are a lot more difficult to handle or understand. He was working on Pharaoh for the time that God would be glorified because of his rebellion against the Lord. Th Lord was working on the people of Israel to be shepherded by the one they had already rejected, Moses. The Lord is working on you, your situation and everyone between, just like He did with Moses. Waited a minute I thought you were just a recently graduated college kid who ls this God does for Moses just like He does you? You must be someone important God's a pretty busy guy you know.

One last thing. I you find sometime you have a few minutes to be still knowing He is God give a read of Romans 8 and Hebrews 11 and 12. Romans 8 until you know it word for word but more importantly until you believe it. Once you believe it and won't forget it you're ready to serve him wherever He takes you. Read Hebrews 11-12 while you wait on because all things in His time. You will find in Hebrews 11 a list of the faithful and the things they did. This is how you are saved by Faith now what? The Lord talks to us in how athletes are coached and trained to run the race. The Lord asks if we would let Him train us for the race a race we are told the Lord Himself has not only run Himself He laid out the entire course and the Lord runs the race with you. These things in Scripture are metaphors for our lives and the journey we are presently running. Allow Him to train nd run it with you and He promises you to bring forth a harvest full of righteousness from your life.

Lord you are Holy, faithful and merciful and I ask you to hear this prayer. You have raised each of us for the express purpose to glorify you you as you in turn are glorified by the Father and bring Glory to the Father. You have in your great love and mercy have allowed us to share in something so profound the words that could truly make this known to us would fail because as you have told us the things you have prepared for you children unable to be grasped while we still dwell in the flesh but we will not always be in our flesh. Even so come Lord Jesus. Lord we know that you did not place this child who has accepted your free gift of faith and with it your Holy and Righteous Son. Now Lord comes what can often be the most difficult part like Moses wanting to free the children but to free them before it is your time to come out with them and would be even worse to send someone created and sent into this world not being prepared to accomplish that very call upon our but You Lord know exactly what we need when we need and where we glorify you with. let us see you not by sight but faith. amen

Thank you so much for your encouragement! Thank you, "I am redeemed" is a great song; I will go and listen to it again since I haven't heard it in awhile. is the Bible study "Stuck" by Jennie Allen? I will be sure to check it out! Thank you for your prayers; you are so kind. Thank you for sharing about Moses and Paul. It's a really good point about "training." I'm starting to think maybe God has me in this place to teach me and to make me grow closer to Him than I've been before. Thank you again and God bless you!

 

[starryshadows]

I am praying for you.

sign up on Indeed, go to head hunting places like Express Pro

Increase your networking circle by using Social Media and other Job search places.

A big key is that Networking. Call anyone you ever knew.

What is your degree in? Join related groups and unions.

Go to the Unemployment Offices in your area.

Network at Church, hand out Business cards.

Run a newspaper ad. Send a short description of yourself to all possible media, print and online.

Your College will have leads too.

Thank you for your prayers Daniel. That's excellent advice! I am checking Indeed and my college's job boards, but sadly I think right now is not the greatest time for jobs at the university. Although, I did interview for a position at the university and it seemed promising, but I am waiting to hear back.

 

[starryshadows]

May I suggest that you quit worrying about what you are and are not and look to Jesus? If you are born again, you are a new creation. Lord Jesus is your life now. I can assure you that God is satisfied with Him! Don't "try" to love God with your love. God's love is shed abroad in your heart by the Holy Spirit. You can love God with the love that He puts in your heart. Cast all your care on God. Then leave it there! He cares for you more than you can begin to understand - no one truly understands God's love. God loves you just as you are, but He wants to set you free from those things that burden you. The best prayer in your situation (as I have found out by experience) is "HELP!"
You do not have to live in the past. When God forgives, He forgets. The Blood of Christ removes sin as if it never happened. Once you've confessed, God forgives.

Thank you. Yes, you're right, I have looked way too much at myself and how I measure up. I need to fix my eyes on Jesus. Haha. Yes, I admit I say "try" a lot...I think maybe I overthink things, when it really is as simple as just letting go and holding on to Jesus. I am always amazed by His love...it's incredible. He is so, so good!