Defeating Satan

[OK Jeff]

The wife and I have been going through some turmoil recently. The enemy has commenced attacking us over things from long ago, something that causes great insecurity to her. Indirect or unknowing references to this just seem to come from everywhere, and it’s all started at once. I believe the fact that it started just as she and I got in such a strong and good path together is no coincidence. Every time it’d cause her to go silent for a few hours to a few days, usually having me in the dark about it, spurring my insecurity. Finally two nights ago the light came on to me. I recognized it for what it was. She and I talked about it and I’m of the opinion if these attacks bring us together, stronger each time, they’ll likely cease. And if they don’t, so what? We’re still stronger together for having endured it. Ultimately The Lord revealed to me the attacks continue because they’ve been working. The last two days, since this epiphany have been wonderful. Just felt like sharing that. Perhaps it’ll give someone else a short cut to the same result.

 

[OK Jeff]

Sorry for the double post. Not sure how I did that. Lol

 

[unfinishedclay]

The Lord revealed to me the attacks continue because they’ve been working.

Jeff, thanks for sharing this. This above line that you wrote just stands out. It's just way too simple to go over my head, and yet it did. Truly, a revealing statement about spiritual attacks. I do plan on using this as a reference within my circle of Christian sisters offline and will make reference to you.

Edited: And I'm truly glad to read that you and your wife are in breakthrough.

 

[Tropical Wilds]

Not to be “that person,” but I think writing it off as an attack by Satan doesn’t necessarily get to the root of the problem or make it possible to seek an actual resolution. It also kind of blows off how both of you might feel as not actual feelings that need to be dealt with, a reality that seems more plausible than Satan specifically singling you and your wife out.

 

[PeaceJoyLove]

The wife and I have been going through some turmoil recently. The enemy has commenced attacking us over things from long ago, something that causes great insecurity to her. Indirect or unknowing references to this just seem to come from everywhere, and it’s all started at once. I believe the fact that it started just as she and I got in such a strong and good path together is no coincidence. Every time it’d cause her to go silent for a few hours to a few days, usually having me in the dark about it, spurring my insecurity. Finally two nights ago the light came on to me. I recognized it for what it was. She and I talked about it and I’m of the opinion if these attacks bring us together, stronger each time, they’ll likely cease. And if they don’t, so what? We’re still stronger together for having endured it. Ultimately The Lord revealed to me the attacks continue because they’ve been working. The last two days, since this epiphany have been wonderful. Just felt like sharing that. Perhaps it’ll give someone else a short cut to the same result.

God is good!
...all things work together for good...

...because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Allow perseverance to finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

 

[unfinishedclay]

Not to be “that person,” but I think writing it off as an attack by Satan doesn’t necessarily get to the root of the problem or make it possible to seek an actual resolution. It also kind of blows off how both of you might feel as not actual feelings that need to be dealt with, a reality that seems more plausible than Satan specifically singling you and your wife out.

I definitely agree that problems aren't always rooted in spiritual attack. But it is certainly a reason to pray diligently when addressing issues - especially when they are deeply rooted. Sometimes, two people (like in my situation between my husband and myself) have to truly pray and ask for a revelation from God because, when navigating our relationship crises, we can be blinded by things that Satan tempts us to hang onto - like pride, bitterness, lust, and a whole list of sins of the heart that definitely manifest in action. Satan takes care of that temptation part in every sin, which is the root of our problems.

But at the same time, there is a lack of accountability in saying the cliche statement: "the devil made me do it". He doesn't have power over the human will unless we've opened a serious door of stronghold like lust, drug addiction, and alcoholism and others.

He does use temptation of pride in order to blind me in diagnosing all my marital problems with the fact that my husband neglected us and cheated on us. I'm learning that through a really hard lesson - that began with a family member's life on the line from a life-threatening event. I had to either harbor the resentment I was so tempted to foster or roll up my sleeves and help in a way that would have made me literally pass out if I wasn't in survival mode. Now, the person is better. And I sometimes find myself right back to resentment mode again because this person in the family fostered my husband's affair. And Satan's hand of saturating temptation and blinding attacks in so many ways was undeniably involved. There are Satanists out there who would be the first to admit spiritual attacks on people from their own incantations. Just as the gospels warned us, there are definitely spiritual attacks.

Edited to clarify: But we don't just stop with binding and casting out spirits. We are to definitely take an aggressive approach on our own behaviors and mindsets as resolution.

 

[OK Jeff]

I’m not going to go into any detail as to what this is concerning. I will only say it’s merely reminding us of hurts that are years in the past. Perhaps they need further dealing. In any case, this isn’t a “devil made me do it” situation. This is a “remember what you did” situation.

 

[PeaceJoyLove]

To forgive like HE forgives us...is impossible with man, with God all things are possible. Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts.

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.

 

[unfinishedclay]

This is a “remember what you did” situation.

Oh yes sir. This has been us for years. You're right to deal with it, Jeff. Left undealt with in the proper way for us has produced emotional pain beyond words.

And if you ever try dealing with it via counseling (even in church), use caution. There are some good counselors, including church leaders. And there are some who are not so wise. Caution. I'm still battling the unfairness of some things said. Some things said that are very enabling for ruthless mistreatment.

 

[OK Jeff]

I’m not sure what further dealing needs to be done as this has all been out in the open for some time. But the fact it attempts to cause turmoil indicates something.

 

[unfinishedclay]

I’m not sure what further dealing needs to be done as this has all been out in the open for some time. But the fact it attempts to cause turmoil indicates something.

You already indicated you're communicating. You already said God has revealed some things to you. Sometimes "dealing with it" may mean keeping it on the table to continue to work out at the pace opportunity brings as opposed to sweeping things under the rug. Rug-sweeping, failed accountability, bad/adverse communication, the enabling of bad counseling, and pride all led to the downfall of marital innocence between us in my situation. I always hope and pray that our painful transition - from sacredness that we actually did have (considering all possible lies that indicate otherwise) to this reality we're still trying to define - can in some way help somebody else. Important keys I'm learning that are simple but valuable and easy to miss: prayer that is just beyond cliche, honest communication, a willingness to admit to wrong with a willingness to genuinely apologize, and a willingness to change. It looks like your efforts have already covered this basic ground. I'm sure that, as for most in marriage, there will always be something to learn and grow into in order for marital maturity. That places many of us in the same boat.

 

[Gwen-is-new!]

I’m not going to go into any detail as to what this is concerning. I will only say it’s merely reminding us of hurts that are years in the past. Perhaps they need further dealing. In any case, this isn’t a “devil made me do it” situation. This is a “remember what you did” situation.

Thanks for sharing this. It seems our Lord spoke clearly to you! I love when He does that.. PRAISES

 

[mkgal1]

I’m not sure what further dealing needs to be done as this has all been out in the open for some time. But the fact it attempts to cause turmoil indicates something.

What do you think it indicates?

Could it be that she is still not quite believing she's forgiven (by God, by you, by others) that this is continuing to cause turmoil every once in a while?

The way I see it is (general struggles like this, I mean).....we're often confronted with things that test what we believe (but I don't believe God brings these things into our lives....and I'm not quite convinced our enemy orchestrates things, either....just that life naturally brings these things our way). Anyway....I think it's sort of like keeping our spiritual/emotional maturity level in check and strong (like how we exercise our physical muscles). I believe God desires to rid us of unnecessary shame and guilt from the past. That's a prison we often put ourselves into (and, sadly, sometimes that comes from listening to other people....even other Christians). If there's nothing she can do to change the past (and no amends to be made)....then maybe the adage about accepting what she can't change is what's necessary? I do believe that when we believe lies that keep us trapped and disconnected from others we are buying into our enemy's lies. But.....I also believe God and His love is greater than our enemy (we just need to practice believing His love for us).

I also think that we do sort of circle around some issues as we mature. A lot of situations are like onions....and have many layers. As we mature, we can look at the same things a little bit differently (from new perspectives....new insights....and something more to learn from it).

I really recommend reading/listening to Dr. Brene' Brown on the topic of shame.

---------->Based on my research and the research of other shame researchers, I believe that there is a profound difference between shame and guilt. I believe that guilt is adaptive and helpful – it’s holding something we’ve done or failed to do up against our values and feeling psychological discomfort.

I define shame as the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging – something we’ve experienced, done, or failed to do makes us unworthy of connection.

I don’t believe shame is helpful or productive. In fact, I think shame is much more likely to be the source of destructive, hurtful behavior than the solution or cure. I think the fear of disconnection can make us dangerous.

I believe the differences between shame and guilt are critical in informing everything from the way we parent and engage in relationships, to the way we give feedback at work and school.~https://brenebrown.com/blog/2013/01/14/shame-v-guilt/

Listening to shame<-------TED Talk

Shame Resilience Theory