Here's some WISDOM.......
The Twenty-One Greatest Ideas In Human Relationships - By Bill McGinnis....
http://www.committeeforthegoldenrule.org/
1. "LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF."
This is "The Law Of Love," God's most important commandment for all mankind.
For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (
Galatians 5:14 RSV)
This is the starting point, the Scriptural Imperative given many times in the Bible. (See also
Matthew 22:39,
Mark 12:31,
Luke 10:27,
Romans 13:8-10,
James 2:8, 1Peter 4:8.)
And who is our neighbor? Every other person is our neighbor. (See
Luke 10:29-37 for Jesus' answer to that same question.)
But sometimes, no matter how hard we try, we still don't like the other person very much, or we still feel anger or resentment. What can we do in cases like this ?
2. FORGIVE THE OTHER PERSON.
The most troublesome harmful emotion is the emotion of anger. You can neutralize anger by making a direct conscious decision to forgive the other person for whatever he may have done to cause you to feel anger toward him. ("As you forgive, so you will be forgiven." See
Matthew 6:14-15)
3. TREAT THE OTHER PERSON THE WAY YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE TREATED.
This the "The Golden Rule," our most important guideline for dealing with other people.
"So whatever you wish that men would do to you, do so to them; for this is the law and the prophets." (
Matthew 7:12 RSV)
This is the most important rule in human relations. You can apply this rule to almost any situation, and you will not be far wrong. The Golden Rule puts The Law Of Love into action. The remaining eighteen ideas are specific applications of The Golden Rule to different kinds of situations.
4. SMILE AND BE FRIENDLY.
You like it when people smile at you and behave in a friendly way. So do the same to them.
5. BE COURTEOUS.
You like it when people are courteous to you. And you dislike it when people are discourteous or rude to you. So be courteous in all of your dealings with others.
6. BE TRUTHFUL, WITHOUT GIVING OFFENSE.
7. REMEMBER THE OTHER PERSON'S NAME, AND USE IT FREQUENTLY.
You like it when other people remember and use your name. So do the same for them.
8. DON'T ARGUE.
Arguments are very negative. They poison good human relations. You don't like it when someone argues with you. So don't argue with them. And if you see an argument coming, take the appropriate steps to neutralize the argument before it causes too much damage.
9. FIND AREAS OF AGREEMENT.
Relationships are much better when both people focus on their areas of agreement rather than their areas of disagreement.
Most people agree on more things than they disagree on. So if you focus on your areas of agreement with the other person, your areas of disagreement will seem smaller and less important.
10. DON'T CRITICIZE.
Criticism builds hostility and bad attitudes. Criticism is poison to good human relations.
You don't like to be criticized; so don't criticize other people. They don't like it, either. And you won't help accomplish anything good by criticizing.
As your mother should have taught you, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
11. SHOW HONEST APPRECIATION.
You like it when other people take the time and interest to recognize and appreciate the good things you do. So do the same for them. Everyone does some things worthy of appreciation. Find them, and recognize them in the other person.
12. TRY TO SEE THE OTHER PERSON'S POINT OF VIEW.
You like it when the other person understands your point of view and can see problems the way you see them. So do the same for him. Try looking at the situation from the other person's point of view.
13. GIVE YOUR FULL ATTENTION TO THE OTHER PERSON WHEN HE IS TALKING.
You like it when people pay full attention to you when you are talking. So do the same for them.
14. TALK ABOUT THE OTHER PERSON'S INTERESTS.
You like to have other people talk with you about your interests. So do the same for them. Find out what things they are interested in, and steer the conversation toward these things.
15. ADMIT YOU MAY BE WRONG.
This idea is surprisingly powerful and useful!
Here's what to say, whenever there is a disagreement as to a matter of fact: "Now, I may be wrong about this. I frequently am wrong about things. But this is the way it appears to me:" (And then state your beliefs.)
By admitting you may be wrong, and by admitting that you frequently are wrong (You are, you know. We all are.), you almost force the other person to admit that he, too, may be wrong! Then, with your egos out of the way, you can both search objectively for the truth!
And if you really are wrong this time, it will be much less embarrassing for you than if you had been stubbornly insisting that you were totally right!
16. LET THE OTHER PERSON DO MOST OF THE TALKING.
You like it when people let you do most of the talking. So do the same for them. It won't hurt you, and you might learn something.
17. LET THE OTHER PERSON TALK ABOUT HIMSELF.
You like to talk about yourself, don't you? We all like to talk about ourselves! But restrain the urge, and let the other person talk about himself, instead.
18. LET THE OTHER PERSON TAKE SOME CREDIT.
If something has worked out well, don't grab all the credit for yourself, even if you think you deserve it all. Spread the credit around, share it with the other people involved.
19. LET THE OTHER PERSON SAVE FACE.
The expression "saving face" means to maintain dignity, or not to look like an idiot or a worthless person. Sometimes people do things which make them look like an idiot or a worthless person. If you can rescue the other person in such a situation, and help him maintain his dignity, you have done a very good thing.
And maybe someone will do the same for you some day, when you need it most! "As you do, so shall it be done unto you."
20. HOLD THE OTHER PERSON, AND YOURSELF, TO HIGH AND NOBLE STANDARDS.
People tend to live up to the expectations others have of them. If you expect a lot from someone, he tends to give you what you expect. Likewise, if you expect little from someone, that is what you tend to get.
So act honestly, and expect honesty from the other person; act morally, and expect morality from the other person; act fairly, and expect fairness from the other person.
21. GO THE EXTRA MILE.
You are pleasantly surprised when other people do more for you than you had asked, or more than you expect. So do the same for them: "Go the extra mile."
======================
The very first way to promote the Golden Rule is to live by it, yourself. - If anybody questions you, you can simply say, "I try to treat others as I would like to be treated."
Gifts To Give To Others
Jesus teaches us to love all other people as we love ourselves. Here is a nice list of things to give them, as the opportunity arises.
God's Only Law: LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.
This will occupy you for the rest of your life.
The Bible states it very clearly, so there can be no possible misunderstanding:
For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (
Galatians 5:14 RSV)
And who is your neighbor? Everyone is your neighbor. This is shown in the Parable Of The Good Samaritan (
Luke 10:25-37, shown below).
But what about love for God? Doesn't that come first? Yes, but God counts our love for others as if it were love for Himself. So when we love others, we are loving Him at the same time. This is shown in the Parable Of The Sheep And The Goats (
Matthew 25:31-46, in the Appendix below). And we cannot claim to love God until we first love our fellow man.
How To Love Strangers
"Give them what they ask for; give them what they really want; give them what they need."
First, Give Them What They Ask For
When a stranger asks you for something, give it to him, unless you have a really good reason not to. This is the first and most important level of loving someone: give him what he asks for. Don't ask him why he wants it. Don't pass judgment on him or his motives. Simply give him what he asks for. This comes first. Make it your personal policy to grant direct requests: if somebody asks you for something, give it to him. Get in the habit of saying"Yes" to requests.
Jesus was very clear on this point:
"Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you." (
Matthew 5:42 NASB)
Next, Give Them What They Really Want
Many times people are afraid to ask for what they really want. So after you have given them whatever they ask for, go a step farther and try to determine what they really want. The easiest way is simply to ask: "What do you really want?" Then, within your abilities, give them what they really want.
Give Them What They Need
Many people are reluctant to ask for help, even if they need it very much. We should learn to be sensitive to the needs of others and provide for them, even if they do not ask for our help. But be careful about assuming too much: sometimes they would really prefer to do it themselves rather than to accept our help. Many older people, for instance, do not want help in getting in and out of cars, even though they appear to need help. They would rather do it themselves.
Always Follow The Law Of Love and The Golden Rule
The Law Of Love fulfills all of God's law for mankind in this one saying, "Love your neighbor as yourself." The Golden Rule puts The Law Of Love into action: "Treat other people as you would have them treat you." The Law Of Love and The Golden Rule are really the same thing, expressed in two different ways.
The Law Of Love
For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (
Galatians 5:14 RSV)
The Golden Rule
"So whatever you wish that men would do to you, do so to them; for this is the law and the prophets." (
Matthew 7:12 RSV)
But What About Preaching The Gospel? --- Doesn't That Come First?
Some Christians believe that everybody needs Jesus Christ more than anything else, therefore we should always preach the Gospel first,- even before we help people in any other way. What about that?
Yes, it is true that Jesus Christ is more important than anything else. But we should never use this fact as an excuse not to help people who have other needs of immediate high priority.
If someone needs food, feed him first. Then tell him about Christ, when he is in a better position to listen.
Blessings to you in Jesus Christ, our Lord.
=================================
Gifts To Give To Someone You Love - Author unknown -
1. The gift of listening.....Try giving this to someone in need. And you must really listen. No interrupting, no daydreaming, no planning your responses. Just listen.
2. The gift of signs of affection.....Be generous with your hugs, kisses and gentle squeezes of the hand. Let these tiny actions demonstrate the love inside of you.
3. The gift of a note..... It can be as simple as "I Love You" or as creative as a sonnet. Put your notes where they will surprise your loved one.
4. The gift of laughter.....Just cut out a cartoon, save a clever article. Your gift will say, "I love to laugh with you."
5. The gift of compliment.....A simple "You look good in blue" or "Good supper" can be of greatest value to those who may feel they are being taken for granted.
6. The gift of a favor.....Help with the dishes, run an errand, etc.....do it willingly.
7. The gift of leaving alone.....There are times in our lives when we want nothing better than to be left alone. Become more sensitive to those times give solitude.
8. The gift of a cheerful disposition.....Try to be cheerful around those you love.
9. The gift of a game.....Offer to play your loved one's favorite game. Even if you lose, you'll be a winner.
10. The gift of prayer.....Pray for your loved ones and let them know you pray for them.
=================================
Welcome To How To Give Your Blessings To Other People
http://www.committeeforthegoldenrule.org/
Rev. Feb. 21, 1998
The Five Most Important Words That You Can Say To Someone Is:
"MAY I PRAY WITH YOU?"
When we pray for someone, the conversation is between us and the Lord. When we give our blessings, however, the conversation is between us and the other person directly, with the Lord listening in, observing.
A blessing is the opposite of a curse. As Christians, we almost never want to curse anybody for anything. In contrast, we should dispense our blessings freely,
whenever the Spirit leads us to do so.
There are two proven formats for giving a blessing to other people. You can give it directly to them, using the word "May," followed by whatever good things you want them to receive. Or you can invoke the Lord's help, using the words "May the Lord," followed by whatever good things you want Him to give them. Here are
examples . . .
Examples Of Direct Blessings
"May you have a safe trip home, with no difficulties of any kind."
"May your days be filled with joy."
"May your pain subside and your illness go away."
"May you get the job you are trying to obtain."
"May your grief pass by like a cloud, and may peace return to your heart."
"May your heart be filled with joy at this moment of happiness for you."
Examples Of Blessings Which Invoke The Lord's Help
"May the Lord richly bless you as you continue your work in His behalf."
"May the Lord give you a safe trip home, with no problems of any kind."
"May the Lord wipe away your tears and give you peace of mind."
"May the Lord bring love and harmony into your home."
* * *
So don't be shy. Just go ahead and start blessing people, as the Spirit leads. When Holy Spirit prompts you to give a blessing, do it! Just walk right up to the other
person, maybe shake their hand or touch them, look them in the eye, and pronounce your blessing on them.
They will recognize immediatly that this is a major expression of love, and they will *always* appreciate it.
Be sure to give Christ the glory by identifying yourself as a Christian. The Lord *loves* to use imperfect vessels for His work, so don't feel unworthy if you are less
than a "perfect" Christian. You are *always* authorized to dispense love to other people: ALWAYS!]
.
Here's some WISDOM.......
The Twenty-One Greatest Ideas In Human Relationships - By Bill McGinnis....
http://www.committeeforthegoldenrule.org/
1. "LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF."
This is "The Law Of Love," God's most important commandment for all mankind.
For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (
Galatians 5:14 RSV)
This is the starting point, the Scriptural Imperative given many times in the Bible. (See also
Matthew 22:39,
Mark 12:31,
Luke 10:27,
Romans 13:8-10,
James 2:8, 1Peter 4:8.)
And who is our neighbor? Every other person is our neighbor. (See
Luke 10:29-37 for Jesus' answer to that same question.)
But sometimes, no matter how hard we try, we still don't like the other person very much, or we still feel anger or resentment. What can we do in cases like this ?
2. FORGIVE THE OTHER PERSON.
The most troublesome harmful emotion is the emotion of anger. You can neutralize anger by making a direct conscious decision to forgive the other person for whatever he may have done to cause you to feel anger toward him. ("As you forgive, so you will be forgiven." See
Matthew 6:14-15)
3. TREAT THE OTHER PERSON THE WAY YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE TREATED.
This the "The Golden Rule," our most important guideline for dealing with other people.
"So whatever you wish that men would do to you, do so to them; for this is the law and the prophets." (
Matthew 7:12 RSV)
This is the most important rule in human relations. You can apply this rule to almost any situation, and you will not be far wrong. The Golden Rule puts The Law Of Love into action. The remaining eighteen ideas are specific applications of The Golden Rule to different kinds of situations.
4. SMILE AND BE FRIENDLY.
You like it when people smile at you and behave in a friendly way. So do the same to them.
5. BE COURTEOUS.
You like it when people are courteous to you. And you dislike it when people are discourteous or rude to you. So be courteous in all of your dealings with others.
6. BE TRUTHFUL, WITHOUT GIVING OFFENSE.
7. REMEMBER THE OTHER PERSON'S NAME, AND USE IT FREQUENTLY.
You like it when other people remember and use your name. So do the same for them.
8. DON'T ARGUE.
Arguments are very negative. They poison good human relations. You don't like it when someone argues with you. So don't argue with them. And if you see an argument coming, take the appropriate steps to neutralize the argument before it causes too much damage.
9. FIND AREAS OF AGREEMENT.
Relationships are much better when both people focus on their areas of agreement rather than their areas of disagreement.
Most people agree on more things than they disagree on. So if you focus on your areas of agreement with the other person, your areas of disagreement will seem smaller and less important.
10. DON'T CRITICIZE.
Criticism builds hostility and bad attitudes. Criticism is poison to good human relations.
You don't like to be criticized; so don't criticize other people. They don't like it, either. And you won't help accomplish anything good by criticizing.
As your mother should have taught you, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
11. SHOW HONEST APPRECIATION.
You like it when other people take the time and interest to recognize and appreciate the good things you do. So do the same for them. Everyone does some things worthy of appreciation. Find them, and recognize them in the other person.
12. TRY TO SEE THE OTHER PERSON'S POINT OF VIEW.
You like it when the other person understands your point of view and can see problems the way you see them. So do the same for him. Try looking at the situation from the other person's point of view.
13. GIVE YOUR FULL ATTENTION TO THE OTHER PERSON WHEN HE IS TALKING.
You like it when people pay full attention to you when you are talking. So do the same for them.
14. TALK ABOUT THE OTHER PERSON'S INTERESTS.
You like to have other people talk with you about your interests. So do the same for them. Find out what things they are interested in, and steer the conversation toward these things.
15. ADMIT YOU MAY BE WRONG.
This idea is surprisingly powerful and useful!
Here's what to say, whenever there is a disagreement as to a matter of fact: "Now, I may be wrong about this. I frequently am wrong about things. But this is the way it appears to me:" (And then state your beliefs.)
By admitting you may be wrong, and by admitting that you frequently are wrong (You are, you know. We all are.), you almost force the other person to admit that he, too, may be wrong! Then, with your egos out of the way, you can both search objectively for the truth!
And if you really are wrong this time, it will be much less embarrassing for you than if you had been stubbornly insisting that you were totally right!
16. LET THE OTHER PERSON DO MOST OF THE TALKING.
You like it when people let you do most of the talking. So do the same for them. It won't hurt you, and you might learn something.
17. LET THE OTHER PERSON TALK ABOUT HIMSELF.
You like to talk about yourself, don't you? We all like to talk about ourselves! But restrain the urge, and let the other person talk about himself, instead.
18. LET THE OTHER PERSON TAKE SOME CREDIT.
If something has worked out well, don't grab all the credit for yourself, even if you think you deserve it all. Spread the credit around, share it with the other people involved.
19. LET THE OTHER PERSON SAVE FACE.
The expression "saving face" means to maintain dignity, or not to look like an idiot or a worthless person. Sometimes people do things which make them look like an idiot or a worthless person. If you can rescue the other person in such a situation, and help him maintain his dignity, you have done a very good thing.
And maybe someone will do the same for you some day, when you need it most! "As you do, so shall it be done unto you."
20. HOLD THE OTHER PERSON, AND YOURSELF, TO HIGH AND NOBLE STANDARDS.
People tend to live up to the expectations others have of them. If you expect a lot from someone, he tends to give you what you expect. Likewise, if you expect little from someone, that is what you tend to get.
So act honestly, and expect honesty from the other person; act morally, and expect morality from the other person; act fairly, and expect fairness from the other person.
21. GO THE EXTRA MILE.
You are pleasantly surprised when other people do more for you than you had asked, or more than you expect. So do the same for them: "Go the extra mile."
======================
The very first way to promote the Golden Rule is to live by it, yourself. - If anybody questions you, you can simply say, "I try to treat others as I would like to be treated."
Gifts To Give To Others
Jesus teaches us to love all other people as we love ourselves. Here is a nice list of things to give them, as the opportunity arises.
God's Only Law: LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.
This will occupy you for the rest of your life.
The Bible states it very clearly, so there can be no possible misunderstanding:
For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (
Galatians 5:14 RSV)
And who is your neighbor? Everyone is your neighbor. This is shown in the Parable Of The Good Samaritan (
Luke 10:25-37, shown below).
But what about love for God? Doesn't that come first? Yes, but God counts our love for others as if it were love for Himself. So when we love others, we are loving Him at the same time. This is shown in the Parable Of The Sheep And The Goats (
Matthew 25:31-46, in the Appendix below). And we cannot claim to love God until we first love our fellow man.
How To Love Strangers
"Give them what they ask for; give them what they really want; give them what they need."
First, Give Them What They Ask For
When a stranger asks you for something, give it to him, unless you have a really good reason not to. This is the first and most important level of loving someone: give him what he asks for. Don't ask him why he wants it. Don't pass judgment on him or his motives. Simply give him what he asks for. This comes first. Make it your personal policy to grant direct requests: if somebody asks you for something, give it to him. Get in the habit of saying"Yes" to requests.
Jesus was very clear on this point:
"Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you." (
Matthew 5:42 NASB)
Next, Give Them What They Really Want
Many times people are afraid to ask for what they really want. So after you have given them whatever they ask for, go a step farther and try to determine what they really want. The easiest way is simply to ask: "What do you really want?" Then, within your abilities, give them what they really want.
Give Them What They Need
Many people are reluctant to ask for help, even if they need it very much. We should learn to be sensitive to the needs of others and provide for them, even if they do not ask for our help. But be careful about assuming too much: sometimes they would really prefer to do it themselves rather than to accept our help. Many older people, for instance, do not want help in getting in and out of cars, even though they appear to need help. They would rather do it themselves.
Always Follow The Law Of Love and The Golden Rule
The Law Of Love fulfills all of God's law for mankind in this one saying, "Love your neighbor as yourself." The Golden Rule puts The Law Of Love into action: "Treat other people as you would have them treat you." The Law Of Love and The Golden Rule are really the same thing, expressed in two different ways.
The Law Of Love
For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (
Galatians 5:14 RSV)
The Golden Rule
"So whatever you wish that men would do to you, do so to them; for this is the law and the prophets." (
Matthew 7:12 RSV)
But What About Preaching The Gospel? --- Doesn't That Come First?
Some Christians believe that everybody needs Jesus Christ more than anything else, therefore we should always preach the Gospel first,- even before we help people in any other way. What about that?
Yes, it is true that Jesus Christ is more important than anything else. But we should never use this fact as an excuse not to help people who have other needs of immediate high priority.
If someone needs food, feed him first. Then tell him about Christ, when he is in a better position to listen.
Blessings to you in Jesus Christ, our Lord.
=================================
Gifts To Give To Someone You Love - Author unknown -
1. The gift of listening.....Try giving this to someone in need. And you must really listen. No interrupting, no daydreaming, no planning your responses. Just listen.
2. The gift of signs of affection.....Be generous with your hugs, kisses and gentle squeezes of the hand. Let these tiny actions demonstrate the love inside of you.
3. The gift of a note..... It can be as simple as "I Love You" or as creative as a sonnet. Put your notes where they will surprise your loved one.
4. The gift of laughter.....Just cut out a cartoon, save a clever article. Your gift will say, "I love to laugh with you."
5. The gift of compliment.....A simple "You look good in blue" or "Good supper" can be of greatest value to those who may feel they are being taken for granted.
6. The gift of a favor.....Help with the dishes, run an errand, etc.....do it willingly.
7. The gift of leaving alone.....There are times in our lives when we want nothing better than to be left alone. Become more sensitive to those times give solitude.
8. The gift of a cheerful disposition.....Try to be cheerful around those you love.
9. The gift of a game.....Offer to play your loved one's favorite game. Even if you lose, you'll be a winner.
10. The gift of prayer.....Pray for your loved ones and let them know you pray for them.
=================================
Welcome To How To Give Your Blessings To Other People
http://www.committeeforthegoldenrule.org/
Rev. Feb. 21, 1998
The Five Most Important Words That You Can Say To Someone Is:
"MAY I PRAY WITH YOU?"
When we pray for someone, the conversation is between us and the Lord. When we give our blessings, however, the conversation is between us and the other person directly, with the Lord listening in, observing.
A blessing is the opposite of a curse. As Christians, we almost never want to curse anybody for anything. In contrast, we should dispense our blessings freely,
whenever the Spirit leads us to do so.
There are two proven formats for giving a blessing to other people. You can give it directly to them, using the word "May," followed by whatever good things you want them to receive. Or you can invoke the Lord's help, using the words "May the Lord," followed by whatever good things you want Him to give them. Here are
examples . . .
Examples Of Direct Blessings
"May you have a safe trip home, with no difficulties of any kind."
"May your days be filled with joy."
"May your pain subside and your illness go away."
"May you get the job you are trying to obtain."
"May your grief pass by like a cloud, and may peace return to your heart."
"May your heart be filled with joy at this moment of happiness for you."
Examples Of Blessings Which Invoke The Lord's Help
"May the Lord richly bless you as you continue your work in His behalf."
"May the Lord give you a safe trip home, with no problems of any kind."
"May the Lord wipe away your tears and give you peace of mind."
"May the Lord bring love and harmony into your home."
* * *
So don't be shy. Just go ahead and start blessing people, as the Spirit leads. When Holy Spirit prompts you to give a blessing, do it! Just walk right up to the other
person, maybe shake their hand or touch them, look them in the eye, and pronounce your blessing on them.
They will recognize immediatly that this is a major expression of love, and they will *always* appreciate it.
Be sure to give Christ the glory by identifying yourself as a Christian. The Lord *loves* to use imperfect vessels for His work, so don't feel unworthy if you are less than a "perfect" Christian.
You are *always* authorized to dispense love to other people: ALWAYS!
