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Curious About Your Opinion On This

Discussion in 'The Ancient Way - Eastern Orthodox' started by Chesterton, Feb 23, 2020.

  1. rusmeister

    rusmeister A Russified American Orthodox Chestertonian

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    We need a much larger warning that this is an Orthodox sub-forum. Most Westerners today have a very fuzzy conception of sacred places, and naturally, not seeing the church as especially sacred, do not see a problem with doing it in the nave during DL.

    It is obvious to most of us Orthodox that it ought not to be done in the nave, and really ought to be done elsewhere - the narthex if there is nowhere else, or some other room altogether. Weather may not allow outdoor feeding and there really could be no other room.

    No one objects to feeding babies. That's a straw man.
     
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  2. prodromos

    prodromos Senior Veteran Supporter

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    Perhaps, but this may be part of the reason why traditionally women are supposed to be on one side of the church and men on the other.
     
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  3. dzheremi

    dzheremi Coptic Orthodox non-Egyptian

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    Is it? I can't say I've ever seen that happening, even though we've kept that particular practice. Then again, I've never spent any amount of time looking, either. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
     
  4. prodromos

    prodromos Senior Veteran Supporter

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    I'm assuming it was primarily to promote good order during the divine services, but it doesn't seem to stop the elderly women talking amongst themselves during the liturgy, or the men for that matter.
     
  5. ~Anastasia~

    ~Anastasia~ † Handmaid of God † Supporter CF Senior Ambassador

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    That's an interesting thought.

    In antiquity (or even a few decades ago) they wouldn't have had the service on a tv screen in another room anyway.

    I BF my daughter. Past the first few weeks, it was easy enough to do it anywhere and no one realized - they thought I was holding a sleeping baby.

    Like I said, everything is heavily dependent on culture. In today's culture in the US (since that's where I live) ... I'd heavily come down on the side that it's not an appropriate place, since we do have the other places and everyone is mixed together in the Church.
     
  6. Chesterton

    Chesterton Whats So Funny bout Peace Love and Understanding Supporter

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    Our current church is a relatively small one, with a small narthex. People are always hanging out in the narthex throughout the service, though. If I try to put myself in her shoes and think what would I have done, I'd have at least gone to the narthex, maybe even into the restroom for a few minutes.
     
  7. prodromos

    prodromos Senior Veteran Supporter

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    The restroom is germ paradise, the last place you would want to breast feed.
     
  8. Chesterton

    Chesterton Whats So Funny bout Peace Love and Understanding Supporter

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    I'd like to ask you something (or anyone else reading this). The matter of public breastfeeding is controversial in the U.S. at least. I've never been a parent, so I don't know why it needs to be done. As adults, most of us have more or less regular eating times - breakfast, lunch, dinner - but are babies schedules more erratic? Do they just need to be fed at random times whenever they get hungry?
     
  9. Chesterton

    Chesterton Whats So Funny bout Peace Love and Understanding Supporter

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    Well see, there you go. That's why I've been led not to be a parent. :)
     
  10. BNR32FAN

    BNR32FAN He’s a Way of life Supporter

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    Lol when I saw that post I was like “Oh brother, surely we’re not going to blame that on Rome to”. :doh:
     
  11. Cheryl6397

    Cheryl6397 Member

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    Anywhere is ok to feed a baby when hungry though churches I know have rooms where babies and toddlers can be taken and a tv is installed so the service can be watched anyway
     
  12. gurneyhalleck1

    gurneyhalleck1 Reader

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    I always find it curious when I step out of the church for a minute to go to the restroom, how many parishioners are gathered in the parish hall just hanging out and talking, some of whom have their feet up on the table chillin'......Church can be a surreal place.
     
  13. prodromos

    prodromos Senior Veteran Supporter

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    There is a miracle involved in breast feeding that mothers can confirm.
    A mother always knows when her baby is about to wake up hungry because her breasts fill up with milk moments before
     
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  14. ArmyMatt

    ArmyMatt Regular Member Supporter

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    well, I am fine with special rooms, just not in the nave while the service is going on.
     
  15. Darkhorse

    Darkhorse just horsing around

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    In my experience, babies don't follow anything remotely resembling a schedule, and trying to make them adhere to one makes everyone miserable.

    In addition to their small stomachs and erratic attention to food, they often vomit or "spit up" what they just ingested, and they may - or may not - want to replace it right away.

    So...you feed babies when they're hungry, and (if you're lucky) you fall asleep when they do.
    That's why babies have voices and women have breasts.
     
  16. athenken

    athenken Barbary pirates? Or are they?

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    Wow, the ignorance in this post is astounding. As the father of 7 kids, I can attest to how valuable a schedule is, and yes babies are able to be trained to be molded into a schedule, which is something they are able to build on once they are able to realize who they are and what's going on. My wife has been able to develop schedules for all of our kids, which not only builds a sense of security for the little one but also adds to the sanity of mom.
     
  17. Paidiske

    Paidiske Clara bonam audax Supporter

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    Older babies do tend to settle into more of a routine, and in some circles trying to impose more routine (as suggested in post #36) is still seen as desirable (it used to be more common advice years ago).

    In my experience, all the advice I was given as a new mum was to demand-feed (which is what you call feeding babies whenever they seem to want/need it), as opposed to trying to impose a schedule, because babies know and will tell you when they need feeding, and demand-feeding is a better way to build up and maintain your supply of milk (some mums can have real problems making and continuing to make enough).

    Also, especially in the early days, breastfeeding is time-consuming! It wasn't unusual for my daughter to feed for an hour, be okay for a couple of hours, then be hungry again... so in any given three hour stretch of the day, I'd probably spend a third of that feeding. (Again, this is the early months, before solids are introduced at about four months old). So if you've got a liturgy that goes for three hours, the chances of making it through without feeding, with a baby like mine, would be about nil.

    As far as feeding in public, I had two choices; I could feed outside my home, or I could be relatively housebound (see my previous paragraph). I'd generally try to find a secluded corner somewhere, but I wasn't prepared to basically never go anywhere for more than the short time between feeds.

    As far as church goes, I think I mostly fed in the narthex, but I really hated the feeling of being cut of from participation in the liturgy. These days I tell mothers in my church that they are welcome to feed their babies as needed.
     
  18. rusmeister

    rusmeister A Russified American Orthodox Chestertonian

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    I’ve said this before, but there is one thing I am now certain of, and that is that such “small “t”” traditions are VERY valuable in a society that has gone mad on denying any difference between the sexes (aside from the ubiquitous error of referring to them as “genders”). That goes for head coverings and other traditions that affirm differing forms for men and women.
     
  19. ~Anastasia~

    ~Anastasia~ † Handmaid of God † Supporter CF Senior Ambassador

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    I see it's already been answered but I will reply. :)

    Babies (and sometimes mothers for the sake of establishing their milk supply) nurse very frequently - and sometimes for different reasons (i.e. comfort, etc.).

    Basically during a several-hours long Liturgy, it is unlikely a young infant will forgo nursing AND be quiet during the entire time.

    There have been a lot of social pushing because people did suggest mothers feed in restrooms. I did it once (and in a large handicapped restroom so at least I could have her things and it was cleaner - but still.) Restrooms are not an appropriate place to feed babies.

    So I sought out relatively private places - sometimes I'd return to my car if nothing was available. I learned to do it discreetly. And that was my personal comfort level. But there were times she was hurt or very distressed and I could nurse her instantly anywhere without anyone realizing if need be.

    But Church is different - to me. I'm not in a position to tell anyone else what to do, but I would step out, at least given my own context.
     
  20. prodromos

    prodromos Senior Veteran Supporter

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    I guess we need to be more sensitive because the corrupt culture we are raised in pushes a hyper sexualised view of female anatomy. In other cultures I don't think anyone would bat an eyelid when a woman breastfeeds.
     
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