COMEDY TIME What to do or say when a telemarketer calls:

[one 4 Christ]

What do you do when a telemarketer calls and you can not get them off the phone.

Example:

Put the receiver down on the floor and finish my meal!!

DISCLAIMER:
If your occupation is telemarketing please do not be offended, I do not mean any harm!!!:o

 

[RedneckAnglican]

I let my 4 year old talk to them...

 

[one 4 Christ]

I let my 4 year old talk to them...

LOL..... I love it!!!!

 

[Snoofles]

if you bark like a dog for three minutes straight, i'll buy your product.

 

[wendythepooh]

I tell them how very glad I am that they called because I am very lonesome...I need a friend...would they please be my friend...I lost all my other friends and I just don't know why....my doctor says if I keep taking my medication that I will be fine and won't linger on death and dismemberment....so far it's working...cuz I just love people to death...literally...love love love love love......

 

[alabaster jar]

Well, I'd like to say--'give me YOUR home phone number and I'll call right back.'

but I just say 'not interested.'

 

[one 4 Christ]

My roommate,s father literally says:
"If you do not know how to pronounce my name then you apparently do not know me"
[CLICK]

Here 's one, just play some "elevator music" I am sure that they will hang up!

 

[Roman Soldier]

Try to sell them something. Or explain personal problems to them.

 

[one 4 Christ]

Screem and tell them that you hear a bug (bee or fly) and you are not sure if it is coming from the phone.
OR just keep saying hello over and over.
OR start singing in a really bad voice.

 

[xhristlives]

OR just keep saying hello over and over.
OR start singing in a really bad voice.

yep, i've already done these 2...they definitely work!!!

u can also pretend that u are trying 2 'hit' on them-its hilarious!!

 

[If Not For Grace]

I pretend to be an answering machine:

"Your call is very important to us, if you will remain on the line, you call will be directed to the next available representative...over and over...

 

[goldenviolet]

"this is a private unlisted number, please take it off of your calling list."

i have only had two calls this whole year. one was from the phone company to inlist us on a new program, and i told them the same thing. they can mail info with the bill.

the other was a college my one ofd my son's was looking at.

(i enjoyed the ansewrs here!)

 

[If Not For Grace]

Start a sermon:


"out demons of nicotione and alcohol...

 

[brinny]

start off by asking for their name, address, and social security number.....

 

[SeekAnd]

I think next time I get a telemarketer call Ill just start singing 'the Girl from Ipanema'. Since I only know a few words Ill have to hum most of it. Ill probably insert a simulated drum solo in there too. Maybe Ill even ask them to sing along.

 

[crossrunner]

"Me no English."
"I'd be happy to buy your product...can I pay in Monopoly money?"
Just start sneezing...and don't stop.
or....

Just put your number on the Do Not Call List. It works for me!!

 

[BeachBlonde]

we let our 3 year old talk to them..they hang right up

 

[ConstanceB]

I tell them how very glad I am that they called because I am very lonesome...I need a friend...would they please be my friend...I lost all my other friends and I just don't know why....my doctor says if I keep taking my medication that I will be fine and won't linger on death and dismemberment....so far it's working...cuz I just love people to death...literally...love love love love love......

I love it! Very well done -- almost like it's, uh, for real?

Here's another:

"Hello?" (telemarketer begins spiel) "I'm so -- so sorry. I thought you were the Meals on Wheels for my mother. Or the church; they're bringing used clothes over for my kids. I hope there's coats; the propane company won't keep a tab for me any more. I mean, if my husband would call and tell us where he is, or maybe bring back the car . . . I mean, OK, we're in a rough patch, but to leave our little Marcie and Donnie and the triplets?"

At worst, they hang up the phone. But sometimes they offer to send you money.

 

[Andy Broadley]

Njet?

 

[one 4 Christ]

Ummmm you are interrupting a very important tea time with me and 6 of my imaginery friends.if this continues one of them just might walk out...
LOL......