- Jul 14, 2017
- 27
- 21
- 58
- Country
- Singapore
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Celibate
I hope to get insight to wife's thoughts? We were both married 28 years (she was my first date) ago in church and have 2 grown children. We are church members and served in marriage ministry for over 10 years.
We both held high executive positions and are financially independent. I bought a condo (under her name) 6 years ago - we are living there now. I love her very much ... never had any quarrels before my medical incident.
3 years ago I was medically mismanaged and caused me 2 years semi-comatosed (bed ridden). Many friends from home and abroad prayed for me. I woke up 1 year ago (couldn't hold a pencil) and undergone physiotherapy to help me regain my senses. I can now make a drink for myself and walk slowly. I am medically retired now.
My mental faculty resumed dramatically the past 6 months and noticed some strange behaviours exhibited by my wife. I hope some Christians can give me some insights to these behaviours.
Recently (past 4 months now), my wife goes to the gym at 6 am. At 8 am, she is off to office and return home past midnight (Mon till Fri). She said many teams to motivate/counsel, so after dinner they usually go clubbing. I asked if she is meeting clients. She said "No. Motivating staff. You have your own dinner and don't go out at night - in view of your condition.".
One evening she put me to bed at 9.30 pm and I woke up at 10.30 pm. I called out to her and searched all the rooms, she was not in the condo. I went downstairs to check her car and catch up on some reading. Her car was there and most likely someone fetched her out. At 12.30 am, she walked into the condo via side gate for residents. She was surprised to see me downstairs.
I asked "Where were you so late?".
She (wife) replied "Was having coffee with Ruby at Starbucks nearby. We met around 11.30 pm, she having issues at work."
I then said "I was down here since 10.30 pm .... didn't see you passed me by."
She (wife) replied "Oh. Time flies I didn't noticed the timing."
I asked (angrily) "Show me the message of your meeting."
She retorted "Phone is my private space. Go to bed, sick man!"
I showed her I noted our quarrel and incident in my log book.
Two days later she showed me the call log of her phone .... Ruby did call her at 7.45 am on that day. She did not let me hold her phone, just showed me the incoming log for the day. I was already surprised ... the rest of the log was her call to me and our daughters numbers. Very, very surprised "Why no one else called her?" Another surprised was the log was 28 June ... Ruby apparently called her at 7.45 am .... we quarreled at 1 am. She messed with her mobile log alibi. I didn't want to let her know I noticed and am well now.
Next morning, I pretended nothing happened. I saw her back from the gym at 7 am and said "Darling, careful with your exercise. Don't hurt your knees." She was very happy and thought I have a weak memory and tore off the page in my log book where I recorded our quarreling incident. I now recorded incident in my mobile where it is password encrypted.
1) I asked her if she want to resign from her job, she said "No. I enjoy my work and financial independence." I also asked if we should separate, she said "No. You are sick. I will be back before midnight then.". So now she is back by midnight (Mon-Fri) and I sometimes tasted alchohol in her lips when I kissed her.
2) Another thing that got me upset was my medical settlement ($500K) paid by hospital/doctor to me was banked into our joint account and she later transferred to ten x $50K Fixed Deposit certificates under her name.
3) We have own savings account. She asked me to transfer all of savings to her. I said "No" ... I have willed to our 2 children.
I am getting a PI to investigate her evenings clubbing with staff.
Any valid reasons for her behaviours (item 1 & 2)?
We both held high executive positions and are financially independent. I bought a condo (under her name) 6 years ago - we are living there now. I love her very much ... never had any quarrels before my medical incident.
3 years ago I was medically mismanaged and caused me 2 years semi-comatosed (bed ridden). Many friends from home and abroad prayed for me. I woke up 1 year ago (couldn't hold a pencil) and undergone physiotherapy to help me regain my senses. I can now make a drink for myself and walk slowly. I am medically retired now.
My mental faculty resumed dramatically the past 6 months and noticed some strange behaviours exhibited by my wife. I hope some Christians can give me some insights to these behaviours.
Recently (past 4 months now), my wife goes to the gym at 6 am. At 8 am, she is off to office and return home past midnight (Mon till Fri). She said many teams to motivate/counsel, so after dinner they usually go clubbing. I asked if she is meeting clients. She said "No. Motivating staff. You have your own dinner and don't go out at night - in view of your condition.".
One evening she put me to bed at 9.30 pm and I woke up at 10.30 pm. I called out to her and searched all the rooms, she was not in the condo. I went downstairs to check her car and catch up on some reading. Her car was there and most likely someone fetched her out. At 12.30 am, she walked into the condo via side gate for residents. She was surprised to see me downstairs.
I asked "Where were you so late?".
She (wife) replied "Was having coffee with Ruby at Starbucks nearby. We met around 11.30 pm, she having issues at work."
I then said "I was down here since 10.30 pm .... didn't see you passed me by."
She (wife) replied "Oh. Time flies I didn't noticed the timing."
I asked (angrily) "Show me the message of your meeting."
She retorted "Phone is my private space. Go to bed, sick man!"
I showed her I noted our quarrel and incident in my log book.
Two days later she showed me the call log of her phone .... Ruby did call her at 7.45 am on that day. She did not let me hold her phone, just showed me the incoming log for the day. I was already surprised ... the rest of the log was her call to me and our daughters numbers. Very, very surprised "Why no one else called her?" Another surprised was the log was 28 June ... Ruby apparently called her at 7.45 am .... we quarreled at 1 am. She messed with her mobile log alibi. I didn't want to let her know I noticed and am well now.
Next morning, I pretended nothing happened. I saw her back from the gym at 7 am and said "Darling, careful with your exercise. Don't hurt your knees." She was very happy and thought I have a weak memory and tore off the page in my log book where I recorded our quarreling incident. I now recorded incident in my mobile where it is password encrypted.
1) I asked her if she want to resign from her job, she said "No. I enjoy my work and financial independence." I also asked if we should separate, she said "No. You are sick. I will be back before midnight then.". So now she is back by midnight (Mon-Fri) and I sometimes tasted alchohol in her lips when I kissed her.
2) Another thing that got me upset was my medical settlement ($500K) paid by hospital/doctor to me was banked into our joint account and she later transferred to ten x $50K Fixed Deposit certificates under her name.
3) We have own savings account. She asked me to transfer all of savings to her. I said "No" ... I have willed to our 2 children.
I am getting a PI to investigate her evenings clubbing with staff.
Any valid reasons for her behaviours (item 1 & 2)?