Christian ladies, do God WANT you to get married?

[DanC922]

I say that that the context doesnt contradict my assertion, rather it supports it! And I will always encourage people that its better to be single, unless God has CLEARLY shown he wants them to get married. For the majority of people who havent been shown one way or the other, and have been given free will on the subject, well its clearly better for them to stay single, because the BIBLE says those are married care about the things of the world, how they may please their spouse. (thats not paul's 'opinion', thats gospel truth!)

lol Incredible. Just goes to show that if someone wants to believe something false and doesn't care what the Bible really says, they'll believe it regardless of the mountain of proof against them.

 

[ruperik]

Value the problem is as I see it, you seem to be trying to TELL people that they don't need marriage or its not their gift.

I think the problem is he is misrepresenting the text. Here is an example:

118329230492

To say that this number is 18 would obviously be false, but may I point out that 18 is in this number. It is 2 of the digits. Just as I can surgically remove those 2 digits from the whole number without destroying its meaning, you can't remove a line or two from scripture and say it means the same thing.

It does not make sense that God would ordain marriage as he has in the rest of the Bible and then say marriage is a thing to be avoided. We all should seek to do God's will, but to make a blanket statement that it is better to not marry just does not fit.

I agree with DanC922. This thread does prove you can believe just about anything if you want to.

 

[waxlion10]

I think the problem is he is misrepresenting the text. Here is an example:

118329230492

To say that this number is 18 would obviously be false, but may I point out that 18 is in this number. It is 2 of the digits. Just as I can surgically remove those 2 digits from the whole number without destroying its meaning, you can't remove a line or two from scripture and say it means the same thing.

It does not make sense that God would ordain marriage as he has in the rest of the Bible and then say marriage is a thing to be avoided. We all should seek to do God's will, but to make a blanket statement that it is better to not marry just does not fit.

I agree with DanC922. This thread does prove you can believe just about anything if you want to.

AMEN.

 

[valuecard]

see i dont think you guys are putting those marriage verses in the OT in their proper context. Eg if you knew the rapture was 3 days away would you plan a wedding? Obviously no. What about if you knew it was 3 months away, would you plan on starting a family? Obviously know. Ok so (hypothetically), what about if you KNEW you were living in the last days, and the final prophecies concering earth were coming into play, (eg mark of the beast, rise of antichrist, attack on jerusalem, tribulation), is that the best time to get married and start a family? You gotta weigh it up - christianity is about bringing in a harvest of as many souls in as possible prior to judgement day. Its not about getting married and starting a family and trying to raise kids as best you can. Getting married is not a sin but it IS a distraction from the work of God!! (in most cases, the exeption being where God's will is for you to get married so that you can fulfill God's plan for your life). I can name many examples of people i know, christians whose marriages have broken down, who have had their hearts ripped apart by failed marriages, and who will state very clearly that their married life and the raising of a family prevented them for many years from being free to go out and fufill the great commision. It was just too hard to make time for outreach after working then pleasing the wife when you get home and lookin after the kids. There are OBVIOUS negatives to marriage. YOu guys need to wake up and acknolwecge them. As paul says, those who are married care about the things of the WORLD - how they may please their wife. Does God want this for your life? I doubt it. Hence the reason i said its not Gods WILL for most people to get married, however,, he gives us free will and so he says getting married is not a sin. If that doesnt hit the nail on the head that I give up strivin with u guys

Phil

 

[DanC922]

see i dont think you guys are putting those marriage verses in the OT in their proper context. Eg if you knew the rapture was 3 days away would you plan a wedding? Obviously no. What about if you knew it was 3 months away, would you plan on starting a family? Obviously know. Ok so (hypothetically), what about if you KNEW you were living in the last days, and the final prophecies concering earth were coming into play, (eg mark of the beast, rise of antichrist, attack on jerusalem, tribulation), is that the best time to get married and start a family? You gotta weigh it up - christianity is about bringing in a harvest of as many souls in as possible prior to judgement day. Its not about getting married and starting a family and trying to raise kids as best you can. Getting married is not a sin but it IS a distraction from the work of God!! (in most cases, the exeption being where God's will is for you to get married so that you can fulfill God's plan for your life). I can name many examples of people i know, christians whose marriages have broken down, who have had their hearts ripped apart by failed marriages, and who will state very clearly that their married life and the raising of a family prevented them for many years from being free to go out and fufill the great commision. It was just too hard to make time for outreach after working then pleasing the wife when you get home and lookin after the kids. There are OBVIOUS negatives to marriage. YOu guys need to wake up and acknolwecge them. As paul says, those who are married care about the things of the WORLD - how they may please their wife. Does God want this for your life? I doubt it. Hence the reason i said its not Gods WILL for most people to get married, however,, he gives us free will and so he says getting married is not a sin. If that doesnt hit the nail on the head that I give up strivin with u guys

Phil

There is no other context to put the verses about marriage being good in. They are simply saying that marriage is a good gift from God and desirable. However, there is clearly a context to the one verse you are using to form your doctrine, and it's clear that Paul is not speaking it to every circumstance. You cannot interpret Scripture like you are doing. You cannot interpret the bulk of Scripture by a small part that seemingly doesn't fit with the bulk. The small part must be interpreted by the bulk. Again, if you don't do this, it is how cults and destructive heresies are formed.

Every person from the time that Jesus first came until He comes again is in the end times. We should live as though we are in the end times, but not give up the basics of our lives in response. In fact, Paul criticizes Christians for quitting their jobs, and basically quitting life because they assumed the end times are very soon. We should live as though Christ could come back now with an urgency to proclaim the Gospel, but not give up on the good gifts that God wants us to enjoy. Some people may be called away from marriage for a time or for good to do missions or because of persecution, but not very many people will.

Your doctrine sounds a lot like Stoic Asceticism, which denies that pleasure is good, and is not Biblical. God designed marriage to be pleasurable and called it good. We should not be ascetics and run from pleasure. God wants us to enjoy our lives, and has given us many things, including marriage, to do so. You are half right about the purpose of Christianity, but you are missing a big chunk of it, which is why you believe as you do. You said, "christianity is about bringing in a harvest of as many souls in as possible prior to judgement day". While it is true that one purpose of Christians is to be used as a tool to bring more people to Christ, that is not the entire purpose of God saving us. In fact, it is a result of the primary purpose. That primary purpose is for people to love, worship, and enjoy God. Telling other people about God should not be a duty of your faith, but a joyful response to loving your greatest love. And God gave us good things like marriage, good food, good drinks, family, etc... to magnify His goodness as the provider. Asceticism is a very dangerous philosophy that has caused many problems in the church since time began. We are made to be God-enjoyers, not God-pleasers.

Every person from the time that Jesus first came until He comes again is in the end times. We should live as though we are in the end times, but not give up the basics of our lives in response. In fact, Paul criticizes Christians for quitting their jobs, and basically quitting life because they assumed the end times are very soon. We should live as though Christ could come back now with an urgency to proclaim the Gospel, but not give up on the good gifts that God wants us to enjoy. Some people may be called away from marriage for a time or for good to do missions or because of persecution, but not very many people will.

I stated it before, but I'll say it again. God created marriage to be an image of Christ and the church, which is a very good thing. To tell everyone not to marry is to tell them not to have the chance to glorify God by being an example of who Jesus is.

Also, your determination that people are bad=marriage is bad, is a logical fallacy. Bad people making bad marriages does not automatically mean marriage is bad. People and the institute of marriage are separate entities, and their inherant value must be decided separately. God decided marriage is good. Failed marriages are the result of insubmission to the guidance of Jesus.

Submit yourself to the Word of God. It's ok for you to not marry, but don't be telling other people that they can't either. It's not what God's Word says, and you're sinning when you do so. Look past what you want to believe and see what the Bible really says.

 

[xDenax]

christianity is about bringing in a harvest of as many souls in as possible prior to judgement day. Its not about getting married and starting a family and trying to raise kids as best you can. Getting married is not a sin but it IS a distraction from the work of God!!

I completely disagree with you. That's really all I have to say about this topic.

 

[valuecard]

I completely disagree with you. That's really all I have to say about this topic.

Look at the life of Jesus and of Paul. There lives were exactly what I said christianity is all about. And the bible tells us to FOLLOW the example of Jesus and Paul!! God may have other unique plans for people here and there but the general will of God is to follow the example of first Jesus, and secondly of paul.

 

[waxlion10]

Look at the life of Jesus and of Paul. There lives were exactly what I said christianity is all about. And the bible tells us to FOLLOW the example of Jesus and Paul!! God may have other unique plans for people here and there but the general will of God is to follow the example of first Jesus, and secondly of paul.

I'd love to see some Bible verses, please

 

[valuecard]

Umm, i would have thought it was obvious that we are supposed to follow Jesus example, but anyway here are the verses

Mt 8:22 But Jesus said unto him, Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.

Mr 8:34 And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.

1Pe 2:21 For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps:

And for Paul...
2Th 3:7 For yourselves know how ye ought to follow us: for we behaved not ourselves disorderly among you;
2Th 3:9 Not because we have not power, but to make ourselves an example unto you to follow us.

 

[The Nihilist]

Am I the only person here who agrees with Valuecard? It seems that while family life is certainly a good thing for a christian to do, giving up everything and solely pursuing the work of God is better. Consider the rich man, who came to Jesus and told him that he followed all the commandments and lead a righteous life, and asked what more he should do. Jesus told him to sell all his possessions, give his money to the poor, and follow him.
That was really the point, but for context, the man went away, grief stricken, because he had many things. And Jesus said that it was easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven.

 

[Luther073082]

Am I the only person here who agrees with Valuecard? It seems that while family life is certainly a good thing for a christian to do, giving up everything and solely pursuing the work of God is better. Consider the rich man, who came to Jesus and told him that he followed all the commandments and lead a righteous life, and asked what more he should do. Jesus told him to sell all his possessions, give his money to the poor, and follow him.

A good things yes, but not a requirement. Yes its a good thing if you can enter a life of celibacy in order to serve God. BUT its far better to get married and have one wife then to live your life burning in lust. Just because its better doesn't mean its the smartest thing to do for you because you may be overreaching your potential.

Matt 19:11-12

11Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage[c]because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."

Note what Jesus says. . . The one who can accept this (being single and celibate) should accept it. However under no circumstances did he state that marriage is bad or that we should all stop marrying. He's saying, don't get married because the culture tells you to get married. And if you can accept lifelong celibacy, accept it.


In terms of giving, again its always good to give as long as you don't give away money your family needs to eat. But this doesn't make it a requirement. The thing to learn about money is to love God and others more then one loves money.

Jesus had expensive perfume poored on him and told Judas (Who got mad about it and asking why it wasn't sold and the money given to the poor) that we will always have the poor, but not always have him. An odd teaching for someone that you are claiming taught that we should give everything away.

That was really the point, but for context, the man went away, grief stricken, because he had many things. And Jesus said that it was easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven.

Which was followed by

When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and asked, "Who then can be saved?"
Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

On top of that there are passages that allude to people having personal posessions. If they gave away everything, they would not own anything. For example

1 Tim 4:16

16If any woman who is a believer has widows in her family, she should help them and not let the church be burdened with them, so that the church can help those widows who are really in need.

A woman can not help the widows in her family, unless she (and her husband if she is married) own their own posessions. And Paul tells the women to do this because the church itself could become overloaded with too many people to help. This allows them to concentrate on widows who don't have family that can or will help them.

This alone makes it obvious that it is not a sin to own personal posessions, it is what is in your heart about those personal posessions that is important.

 

[waxlion10]

Umm, i would have thought it was obvious that we are supposed to follow Jesus example, but anyway here are the verses

Mt 8:22 But Jesus said unto him, Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.

Mr 8:34 And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.

1Pe 2:21 For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps:

And for Paul...
2Th 3:7 For yourselves know how ye ought to follow us: for we behaved not ourselves disorderly among you;
2Th 3:9 Not because we have not power, but to make ourselves an example unto you to follow us.

Aw, I didn't need the unnecessary snarkiness...

I just wanted to see where you were getting your scriptural support, that's all. Nothing wrong with that.

Thanks for sharing them

 

[The Nihilist]

A good things yes, but not a requirement. Yes its a good thing if you can enter a life of celibacy in order to serve God. BUT its far better to get married and have one wife then to live your life burning in lust. Just because its better doesn't mean its the smartest thing to do for you because you may be overreaching your potential.

Matt 19:11-12


Note what Jesus says. . . The one who can accept this (being single and celibate) should accept it. However under no circumstances did he state that marriage is bad or that we should all stop marrying. He's saying, don't get married because the culture tells you to get married. And if you can accept lifelong celibacy, accept it.


In terms of giving, again its always good to give as long as you don't give away money your family needs to eat. But this doesn't make it a requirement. The thing to learn about money is to love God and others more then one loves money.

Jesus had expensive perfume poored on him and told Judas (Who got mad about it and asking why it wasn't sold and the money given to the poor) that we will always have the poor, but not always have him. An odd teaching for someone that you are claiming taught that we should give everything away.



Which was followed by



On top of that there are passages that allude to people having personal posessions. If they gave away everything, they would not own anything. For example

1 Tim 4:16


A woman can not help the widows in her family, unless she (and her husband if she is married) own their own posessions. And Paul tells the women to do this because the church itself could become overloaded with too many people to help. This allows them to concentrate on widows who don't have family that can or will help them.

This alone makes it obvious that it is not a sin to own personal posessions, it is what is in your heart about those personal posessions that is important.

Ok, I think we're saying the same thing

 

[valuecard]

Aw, I didn't need the unnecessary snarkiness...

Sorry, I took your msg the wrong way. My apologies

 

[Shannie]

I have a question - let's say that this were true and no Christians got married. And let's say they were successful beyond belief at converting the rest of the world. Wouldn't the entire human race die off? No one is allowed to have sex outside marriage and no one gets married?

Seeing as God views children as a blessing and sex as something to be done within marriage, doesn't this suggest God does want people to get married? Aside from the few he blesses with the gift of singleness?

 

[valuecard]

Ok well first of all, the bible says that not everyone will be saved by judgement day, so for this hypothetical, we will suspend our knowledge of bible prophecy and this would be my answer: If everyone got converted, and no one was married, so the human race died off - this would result in the MAXIMUM number of salvations possible and would be the ideal scenario for every person on earth! Children are only a (true) blessing if they grow up to become christians. If they dont follow God, they become more of a curse than a blessing. God is working along a prophetic calendar. The bible talks about their being "seasons and times" for things. God's plan to populate the earth was the "season and time" of adam, and basically the rest of the old covenant". Since the New Covenant has begun (Jesus onwards), God's into a new season of his prophetic calendar - he is no longer concerneced with seeing that the earth is populated (since it IS already OVERLY POPULATED - evidenced by the millions of homeless and starving). The populate the earth box has been "ticked". Now in the new covenant we are to move onto "saving" the earth, not "populating" the earth (that was for generations long before our time).

 

[xDenax]

I think most of your comments are based on your own opinion and maybe some of the opinions of Paul. I don't shape my entire life around what Paul thought. God made humans to desire marriage and children. We were made to marry and have children. He did not then turn around and tell us to quit doing that. I don't care what Paul may or may have not said.

 

[up_to_Him]

There are pros and cons to both sides of the argument. I don't think the Bible supports one preference over the other (single or married). To each his/her own. Of course there is a possibility that you could get more done for Jesus if you were single. But the opposite is true as well. No one says you can't get married and still do the work God wants you to do. Everything is according to God's perfect plan. If He chose one over the other, we would know for sure and this wouldn't even be a debate.

Value, you also list many examples of marriages that were ruined. But there are also marriages that are successful, marriages that are a good role model and inspiration for others. Having children and guiding them towards Christ is also a way of ministering.

You also don't ever mention all the singles who have failed and sinned. There is a lack of accountability when you lead a single and private life. You don't have a spouse there to encourage you to do what's right for God and someone to help pick you up when you fall. inappropriate contentography, gambling, addictions, are all out there for someone who leads a single private life. Not to say that people in marriages don't have to struggle with those things as well. Basically, it's whatever works best for you.

 

[aneley]

I just wanted to add this:

When God created Adam, life for him in the Garden of Eden was better than any of us can imagine. Adam had the closest relationship with God. He spoke with Him, was surrounded by all of God's wonderful creation, and it can truly be said that there was nothing and no one standing between him and God. But...what did God say to him? It is not good for man to be alone. I understand the arguments saying that God must be everyone's top priority. I absolutely agree. But to say that marriage, an institution created and sanctioned by God Himself, is bad or somehow "lower" than being single does not demonstrate understanding of the Bible. We all have different callings. If you are called to serve God as a single, that is great. I wish only blessings to you. But to scorn and look down upon others with a calling different than yours? I don't think I need to say more.

 

[valuecard]

hi aneley. I understand where your coming from but you need to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. First of all, does God want us to keep bringing babies into this world? "It is estimated that some 800 million people in the world suffer from hunger and malnutrition". If we cant feed the people that already ARE, then why would we want to keep bringing more people into the world, whilst letting the current ones die off? I think God would be more concerned about feeding the 800million starving, then he would about christian couples adding to the worlds population. Secondly, everyone seems to quote the verses from THE OT that they like and taht suit them, but you know much of the OT (when taken in context) does not apply to the NT beleivers life, cause many verses were given for people in those times, and in those situations. Adam's situation was unique, and God has a mandate for him to populate the world - hence God gave him a wife and he had lots of babies. Fast forward 6000 years - the world IS ALREADY POPULATED - God's plan is NO LONGER "go forth and multiply", it is now "go into the world and preach the gospel to every creature"!