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Christian Beauty Standards

Discussion in 'MILLENNIALS (1981 to 1998)' started by LaBèlla, Jul 13, 2019.

  1. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

    +6,512
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    The issue of physical appearance was raised in a different thread and I thought it would be a great one to explore from a godly perspective. This question is open to both sexes. :)

    What is your beauty standard?
    What does healthy mean in your opinion?
    Where are you struggling?

    How can you share what you’ve learned without judgment? Are you doing it now?
     
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  2. Sketcher

    Sketcher Born Imperishable

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    If I like it.
    Weightwise? Neither fat nor the Auschwitz look.
     
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  3. S.O.J.I.A.

    S.O.J.I.A. Dynamic UNO

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    my standard is the same as any other guy. I desire a woman who is attractive physically as well as personality-wise.

    health has multiple facets. physical, mental, emotional. you would want a partner who is fit in all these areas.

    I suppose my struggle is that i'm a recluse.
     
  4. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    Answering my own question...

    What is your beauty standard?

    I prefer a classic feminine style for myself. Tasteful makeup and jewelry with knee length skirts and dresses. I’m a fan of ballet flats and heels. I choose quality over trends and use color analysis for my attire. No tattoos or additional piercings save my ears. I keep my hair shoulder length or longer.

    I like a similar look for men. A well-fitting suit or tailored slacks is fine with a neat haircut. No tats or piercings.

    I have a calling to fashion and may be more exacting than most. That’s why. ;-)

    What does healthy mean in your opinion?

    I think it’s a mindset and lifestyle. For me, good nutrition, exercise, beauty treatments, proper rest and weight maintenance. I think it’s important to nurture your spirit and address emotional upsets too. I emphasize peace and joy in my lifestyle. That keeps things balanced.

    Where are you struggling?

    I’ve been home for a long time and it’s easy to take shortcuts when you’re not going to an office each day. I felt a prod within when I read Lessons from Madame Chic a few years ago. I finally reached the point where I wanted to change.

    I started working on a capsule and purging the clothes I never wear (and never will again). I challenged myself to focus on skirts and dresses with light makeup for daily use. I tried a new skincare and beauty line in response. I’m heading in the right direction now.

    How can you share what you’ve learned without judgment? Are you doing it now?

    There are mixed feelings around this subject. But we all want to look our best and I like to encourage it when possible. I’m happy to share tips too.
     
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  5. gospels

    gospels The voice of the Lord flashes forth flames of fire Supporter

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    I have never noticed myself more beautiful than when i had the first experience of being born again and became a new creation. That day i could see the glow on my face as though I was washed white as snow.
     
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  6. dzheremi

    dzheremi Coptic Orthodox non-Egyptian

    +9,755
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    It'd be nice to meet someone who doesn't have some kind of anxiety disorder. Why do these seem so common nowadays? It seems like every woman I know in the 30-36 range has some kind of anxiety/depression mental problem. Perhaps I attract those kinds of girls somehow. Not sure how, in that case. I don't do online dating or anything like that.

    Other than that, standards...eh...in the end, the only thing that is left of the person you once knew is their personality and intelligence, so if those don't knock you out, or at least mesh well with your own, then it won't matter if s/he's a 10 or 2 or whatever. Of course, everyone has their preferences (I've never been much into the stereotypical leggy blonde bombshell sort of thing, for instance, but then my family is pretty much all shorter people, except for my cousins on my mother's side, since her sister married the Swedish version of the Brawny paper towel guy, so they had two kids who are blonde haired, blue eyed and 6'5" and 6'3", respectively), but I've always been surprised at how quickly those can change or take a back seat when it's someone I really click with, personality and intelligence-wise.

    As far as my own struggles, as always I struggle just to meet people, period (been out of the job market for a few years for legal and health reasons I'd rather no go into, so it's not been an option to meet someone at/through work, and the lack of income obviously restricts my ability to go out to many places), which makes trying to keep up my own health a bit difficult sometimes. A lot of people would probably do so out of a need to stay competitive on the dating circuit, but when you're just not a part of that world for years, the motivation must come from somewhere else...and sometimes that's pretty difficult. On the other hand, I can see the value in doing something for yourself and then if the results attract people, then all the better. If they don't, at least you did something.

    Dunno what to say about judgment other than that it's not a good look on a Christian. Hopefully we can be discerning without judging a person for their flaws. Like when I see a person who's fatter than me I don't say or think "Eww, thank goodness I'm not that bad off!", but at the same time I know not to go to them for weight loss tips. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
     
  7. Yennora

    Yennora Buy the truth and sell it not. Pro 23:23

    463
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    I found the thread interesting but I wasn't planning to reply since I'm 23 and the thread was posted in the 30s forums. However, since I found a lot of the follow ups to be off topic and/or sarcastic I decided to give my input. If you would like it 30s only I can delete my input upon your request :)

    What is your beauty standard?

    In myself, I like old fashioned style. I like dark browns, blacks, and darker colours in general. Sometimes a white shirt is good though. I dislike vivid colours, I usually like warm or pale colours more since I find them restful for my eyes. I also care about my gestures. How I stand and how I move and talk is very important. Sadly I fail to achieve this part when my psyche is down sometimes though. I think that a man that doesn't look here and there is more attractive. I like blank tops without drawings or words.

    In women, I have the same preferences. I find darker colours to be really attractive on women. I also find girls that care for their hair to be attractive. I like the "lenghty but not so lengthy" old fashioned hair styles. And some girls do the crown-like braided hair style, that is really beautiful too or natural hairstyles. Nothing too artificial or too fancy attracts me. I also like very light to non-existent makeup. I love all that is natural. Also, I get attracted to modest girls the most. I sense a lot of kindness and sacrifice behind their modesty and modesty in itself is so attractive to me. (exceptions exist)

    What does healthy mean in your opinion?

    I think being healthy is based on diet, exercises and a willingness to avoid all that is suspicious. For example, I don't use liquid soap because it gets too sticky and if that remains on my hands it wouldn't be good when I eat it alongside my food. So I use solid soap. I wash my hands very frequently. I try to avoid junk and fast foods. I prefer all that is natural and homemade. Sometimes I fail at this though :( When I get too lazy, pressurized or tempted. Also I nearly lose my willingness to remain fit when my psyche is down.

    Where are you struggling?

    I'm struggling to remain fit and I'm struggling most with my mental wellbeing. I can break down pretty easily recently, I became very fragile and it is not good. I feel like my energy is being consumed heavily. I don't know how to fix this since I'm unhappy with reality to many levels and I cannot reconcile my wellbeing with all the pain that is happening around me. And it is hard to maintain an energetic ambitious mentality while being emotionally down most of the time. However, I advance slowly.

    How can you share what you’ve learned without judgment? Are you doing it now?

    I love this question! I think I can do that through praising all that I find worthy and beautiful and closing my eyes/ignoring all that I find negative. However, if the negative poses a threat on others I might start giving light advices. If my advices are faced with opposition I back off. It is not my business after all. Sometimes I fail at this as well. I just try at many times.

    This doesn't apply when I have to oppose oppression or defend others though since defending others might require judging/attacking the oppressors sometimes and I find it a duty to do so in some exceptional circumstances.
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2019
  8. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

    +6,512
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    Thank you for posting. The responses are meant to reflect personal opinions without judgment. This can be a challenging subject and I avoided the general population for that reason. This is a thread for singles to express themselves. :)

    Wow, I don’t hear that often. And I concur. It was a hallmark of good deportment long ago.

    You’re not alone in that. What’s more important is your willingness to try and the gains you’ve made thus far.

    Peace should be a frequent prayer request for you. Pay attention to your environment and how you feel in your space. Surrounding yourself with soothing colors and scents that brighten and lift the spirits helps. Essential oils are an option.

    You need an encourager in your personal network. They are the unsung cheerleaders that help us push forward when life gets too hard. I would ask for that in prayer and fill your spirit with the word or worship. It makes a difference.

    That will go a long way to relieve your stress and improve your mood.
     
  9. HowRU?

    HowRU? New Member

    75
    +52
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    Pentecostal
    Married
    Hello LaBella,
    My beauty standard for all people first of all is that their clothing and body are clean. I don’t really want to smell them while just approaching them. I almost don’t care what you do with your hair. Guys with long hair don’t weird me out; neither do girls with short hair. I really think those hangups are cultural. Interestingly, I am most attracted to females with my same basic physical characteristics, e.g. brown eyes, brown hair, highly intelligent (lol). This attraction is a scientifically documented norm.

    What is healthy in my opinion? There is a lot to be said about inner beauty. Spiritual health will translate to emotional health that radiates with joy and a positive attitude. This will eventually lead to knowing your purpose in life that God has for you. Pretty healthy...unless you’re martyred...hmm.

    I struggle from liking coffee too much. My esophagus suffers.

    Am I being judgmental? I hope not.

    LaBella, what I find beautiful about you is your writing style. I have seen a few of your prior posts and been impressed. They’re concise, eloquent and free of grammatical errors. You have the diction of a writer.
     
  10. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    I hadn’t considered this but I can the same. I’m most attracted to the facial contrasts in gentlemen that I have myself. How uncanny.

    I agree. Both are important. But I don’t believe we can neglect our physical form in deference to the inner. I want to honor the Lord inside out. :)

    I’m sorry to hear that. Cold brewed coffee is less upsetting to the stomach. I make my own and use a ratio of 1 cup of coarse ground coffee to 3 cups of water. I let it sit for 24 to 48 hours in the refrigerator. You can make it in a French press. The cleanup is easier.

    That creates the concentrate. Some dilute with water. I don’t. It has more kick. ;-)

    Thank you for the compliment. That’s the Lord’s doing. He’s given me a gift for communication and writing is part of it. I’m happy to hear you’ve enjoyed my thoughts. :)
     
  11. HowRU?

    HowRU? New Member

    75
    +52
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    This attraction people have to others with the same physical characteristics is a bit entertaining to see. Two of my son’s friends have red hair. Both sets of parents are friends of mine. All four parents are red haired. You see it a lot, if you’re paying attention.
    I was at a restaurant today where a family was dining. The father and mother were blonde, with four cute blonde kids.
    This isn’t a rule, of course.
    I married a beautiful brown haired lady, but she has deep blue eyes. Mine are brown. I survive, somehow.
    She’s actually told me she prefers blue eyes and has hinted that I should wear blue contacts for her, since I wear contacts anyway. I haven’t taken that leap.
     
  12. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    I feel the same. I’m attracted to fair-skinned men with dark hair and light eyes. I can appreciate a blonde but it would never be my first choice.
     
  13. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    My beauty standards have been ruined.

    As I am always surrounded by a certain group of women yeah..........

     
  14. thecolorsblend

    thecolorsblend If God is your Father, who is your Mother?

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    If a woman is fat, I cannot be attracted to her. If she doesn't care about herself, why should I? Just a small amount of cardio every day would put a massive dent in America's massive obesity problem. And it wouldn't be a massive time commitment.
     
  15. Paidiske

    Paidiske Clara bonam audax Supporter

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    I had intended to answer, this being in the "Thirties" forum, but then saw you only want singles to reply? You might want to clarify in your OP.
     
  16. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    You can reply. :)
     
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  17. Paidiske

    Paidiske Clara bonam audax Supporter

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    I'm not really sure what this is asking, to be honest. Is it asking, "What does it take for you to be willing to walk out the door in the morning and face the world?" Or is it asking, "What does it take for you to feel beautiful?" Or is it asking, "What do you consider beautiful in others?"

    Hmm... I guess that neither illness nor dysfunction nor unfitness prevent you from living the life you want to live.

    The perennial problem is work-life balance. I work too much to be really good for me, I have a small child with special needs, and looking after myself is often the thing that doesn't make it to the top of the priority list. I think that's partly a season-of-life thing; most working mums I know have a similar struggle. But it would be nice to have more time, energy and headspace to put into eating well, exercise, enough rest etc.

    I think a lot of this comes down to encouraging people to feel that they deserve to look after themselves and be looked after; that self-care is not selfish.
     
  18. Tone

    Tone Star Fish Radiant Supporter

    +3,277
    United States
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    Very broad (standard)...just no fake stuff...the more natural the better.

    Having the energy to put in a good day's work.

    *And to put in some of that good work once home...

    Single.

    I don't understand this question.
     
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2019
  19. kdm1984

    kdm1984 LCMS Lutheran

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    I like men who are considered traditionally handsome by Western standards: proportioned features, Roman nose, chiseled jaw, preferably bearded. Basically your Tyrone Power or Matthew McConaughey types. :)

    I tend to ignore beauty standards for women as this has been such a stumbling block through the ages, particularly for our gender. I'm very nerdy and tomboyish by nature, so I never attract unwanted male attention anyway; it's not like I need to worry about it.
     
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  20. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    I left it open-ended on purpose. I answered from both perspectives: for myself and the gentlemen I’m attracted to. Since you’re married, how do you prefer to look? What makes you feel beautiful?

    Your plate is full. There are simple DIY things you can do at home like a relaxing soak, spa aromatherapy machine, hand and foot treatments, etc. that provide good self-care. A massage would work wonders too.

    True. That was part of the reason I started the thread. Sometimes Christians need encouragement or we’re made to feel it doesn’t matter.
     
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