C'est la vie... although I wish it weren't.

[Angel_of_the_Lord]

Hey guys. I've been feeling a 'lil blue lately.

(For older people who don't think kids nowadays don't know how to love yet, I put love in these ''.) There's a girl I like named Angel, and I 'love' her so much... We use to go out, but two weeks into the relationship she just wanted to be friends. It's been about two months since then, and my feelings haven't died down.

She's really nice, although she jokes around and insults me alot (jokingly), and she loves everything I do. I just don't understand what went wrong, other than me being a complete failure in the social department. I'm always making an idiot of myself while around her (or any girl), and I don't have much confidence in myself because I'm a bit overweight, 'immature' (I call it fun loving), and I'm always insecure and jealous, even though I never say anything about being jealous. I keep it to myself because I don't like to be that way.

Also, girls usually think of me as a friend, and hardly anything else. I usually help them with something, and when they are done with me, they usually leave me alone. Not everyone, though. Angel doesen't. One of the worst things about me is that I'm self-concious. I'm always afraid I'm annoying.

I guess I need to be a bit more assertive and not so wishy-washy, but I don't know how to be. I don't want to seem rude, but I don't want to be walked on, either.

I want to improve myself a bit in the way I act, but I can't. I'm just being... me. I can't help that I love her so much. I love everyone, but some I love in a special way, like her. Something must have happened to her in the past, and I want to find out what so I can help her.


Does anyone have any advice on how to get her to warm up to people a bit? I know its hard to do that, but I wish I could make her life a little better.


I notice all I ever do is post my problems on this site... my bad. ^.^;;

 

[~HopeFloats~]

I am thinking if she is 16 it is a good thing she is not warming up to anybody...

16 is so young and there are so many other thinsg to put your time and efforts in then dating.

Boy do I feel really old saying that.:o

Be blessed she calls you a friend and what more can a person want at 16.

 

[nill]

blahnope

 

[leothelioness]

Well, I'm no one to judge, but I find it extremely hard to come to the conclusion that you "love" someone after only 2 weeks of dating. I think you are feeling infatuation which is more than not mistaken for love. And even though I'm only a year or two older than you, I do believe that people our age don't know what love is because I realise that we don't have the maturity to be able to have that kind of love. So, it's not just "older" people that think that!

If she just wants to be friends I think you should respect her decision. You don't want to ruin a friendship by trying to convince her to "warm up" to you. Just be glad you are friends. Maybe that's God's way of telling you it's not meant to be anything more.

And like the previous poster said, I don't think it would be wise to try to get her to open up to you because then you'll be pushed even more into the friendship zone and you definitely won't get a date out of her! If she knows that you are always there to listen to her problems, she'll see you as nothing more than a friend and she'll be coming to you only to talk over her problems. And being of the male gender, I don't think you'd want that.

So, I say just keep it at the friendship level and know that these feelings of "love", or better yet extreme infatuation, will wear off. Believe me. Don't waste your time on her. Persue someone else.

 

[sherri]

If you're worried something has happened to her in her past just pray for her. God can heal anything and anybody and that is the most giving thing you can do for her.

Apart from that just respect her decision. I know that can be hard if you still have strong feelings for her but if you really do care about her then thats how to show it.

True love is wanting whats best for the other person above whats best for you.

(and I know that sounds a bit preachy and cliched but it's true)

Hope this helps

 

[Heinrich]

If it were 1806 then I would've told you to ask your Dad to "get" her for you... or maybe just propose. And then you can "love" each other and have about 8 children

But it aint 1806..
Dude it's going to be a long time before you can marry anyone. So maybe it's safer to just be friend for now.
There is alot of people out there who would really like to undo the mistakes they made when they where young because when they "loved" someone.

"love" is not wrong. And you are not too young. But some things need to be done inside marraige. Else your gonna get hurt.

Give it time dude. 2 months really is nothing. I heard a story of a dude that wrote a girl letters for YEARS and she never replied and didn't want anything todo with him. I believe she even told him a few times to beat it.
Well they got married

hahaha