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Can't Look in the Mirror

Discussion in 'Anxiety, Panic & Agoraphobia' started by brandynicole, Apr 9, 2020.

  1. brandynicole

    brandynicole Member

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    I see a horrible thing in the reflections I pass throughout the day. My face is deformed and my body is horrifying to look at. People stare at me and find me revolting to look at: I've had people walk up to me, point to my face, and laugh at me with their friends (complete strangers). I've been spat at and pushed by strangers too. No one wants me around and they are not afraid to tell me so.

    Why would God create such an awful-looking creature like me? Is this a mistake or deliberate? Is He punishing me? Am I cursed? I don't understand why God would do this to me.

    This must be a sign that God is not "loving", or at least He doesn't love me.
     
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  2. faroukfarouk

    faroukfarouk Fading curmudgeon

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    Isaiah 48.10: 'I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction'. The blessedness is not in avoiding the furnace of affliction, but in knowing that the Lord has gracious purposes for us.
     
  3. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    Your personality can cover anything. Ugly people can have beautiful faces.
    Beautiful people can have any kind of face there is and people hardly notice.
    My wife had childhood arthritis and I never even considered her hands as ugly.

    But they were as ugly as the wickedest witch. It never even occurred to me.

    [​IMG]
     
  4. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    Interesting.....this advice is perfect for you:
    “Scary Times” Success Manual:
     
  5. brandynicole

    brandynicole Member

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    This is something people say often, but it's just not true. The color of my skin, the gender I was born, my height, etc. all affect how people treat me. Some people are just more fortunate than others.

    It doesn't matter how great my personality is if people are disgusted even before I get a chance to speak.

    It seems that God just made some people inferior to others. I don't understand how a loving God could do such a thing.
     
  6. Aussie Pete

    Aussie Pete Well-Known Member Supporter

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    God did not create you looking as you do. When sin entered the nature of man, things began to go terribly wrong. That includes all the illness, genetic disorders and disabilities of all kinds. Sometimes the behaviour of a parent can contribute to the child's condition. Alcohol consumption during pregnancy can caused serious birth defects, as can drug use.

    You are married. Someone sees you differently. He wants you around.

    Before I was born again, I used to walk past a guy in a wheelchair who was raising money for a disability organisation. He was seriously disabled and I could hardly understand him. I'd stick some money in his tin and off I'd go.

    I got born again. I did not see him for some time. When I did, he was packing up for the day. A taxi was waiting. In those days, they did not have the modified cabs common now. He asked me to help him, so I obliged. I went with him to help him at the other end. He told me that he was a born again Christian, that he loved Jesus and that mentally, he was perfectly normal. He told me that his family assumed that he was retarded because of the way he spoke. He blew me away when he said that he understood and felt sorry for them. This guy knew Jesus. There was not a word of self-pity.

    God looks at the heart. Most people are ugly, disfigured, bitter, twisted and disabled on the inside. Everyone is born that way. Those who accept Christ and get born again have a new heart where Jesus lives. We have an inner beauty that the world knows nothing about. People can be jerks. When they react to you, they expose their own inner ugliness.

    You need to know how God sees you. Man looks at the outward appearance. God looks at the heart. Ask God to show you what He thinks of you. Lord Jesus thought you worth dying for. That's love.

    You've been hurt by a lot of people. That needs to be dealt with also. I suggest that you read this article:
    Can you forgive from your heart? - Christian Life Frankston
     
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  7. Leet

    Leet Newbie

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    I bet you're nowhere near as bad as you think. As for people treating you shamefully, I'm so sorry. They will get their recompense.
     
  8. Tolworth John

    Tolworth John Well-Known Member Supporter

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    People can be very cruel, I am sorry that you experience so much of it, it must takec courage to face each day.

    God does love you, you know this because you are a Christian, but being a Christian does not mean that everything in life becomes lovely.
    Adams rebellion caused the universe to be cursed, most of us experience this through hard work and the occasional illness.
    You have a far more personal reality of that .
    There is little I can suggest other than to stay close to God and to talk to a close friend.
     
  9. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    This is something people say often, but it's just not true. Being a beautiful person is in how you respond to your circumstances, no matter what they are.

    Besides.....what other choices do you have other than being your best?
    Being the worst?

    The prison of your mind | Sean Stephenson

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Apr 10, 2020
  10. brandynicole

    brandynicole Member

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    That's just it...my inside is as bad as my outside!

    I am not only deformed in appearance, but my soul is filthy. The sins I have committed are atrocious to say the least. Even if I spend the rest of my life atoning for it, God will never be pleased with me.
     
  11. brandynicole

    brandynicole Member

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    I don't have any good qualities. I am cursed for sure. My sins are the reason for God's hatred of me. And I don't think I could ever please Him.
     
  12. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    Oh, he already forgave you for your past and even your future.
    So that's not even an issue. Even God will not be doing any
    judging before Judgment day.

    Consider being helpful to somebody for the next 5 seconds. A neighbor for example. You don't even have to see them. Just imagine being helpful to your neighbor. Practice in your imagination.
    Then make a habit of mastering 5 seconds of being helpful to somebody. With practice, you can do this on command. Eventually, you might actually do it in person.
     
    Last edited: Apr 10, 2020
  13. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    The prison of your mind | Sean Stephenson - Video
     
  14. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    So you didn't watch the video yet. Sean Stephenson got paid to speak and be a counselor. Not to look good.
     
  15. brandynicole

    brandynicole Member

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    I watched the video. It's not so easy to completely change in a single moment.
     
  16. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    Try for just 5 seconds.

    Then work from that.

    Try saying an optimistic sentence that is 5 seconds long.
    See if you can reach the end of the sentence. If you reach
    the end of the senace without your heart stopping, then
    you have one success to build on. Good job!

    More of Sean.
     
    Last edited: Apr 10, 2020
  17. brandynicole

    brandynicole Member

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    Okay, I'll give it a try
     
  18. Aussie Pete

    Aussie Pete Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I'm glad that you think the way you do. And you are right in some ways. There is nothing good in you. And that is exactly why God sent Jesus to die in your place. God loves you, but your sins disqualify you from entering His home. So God sent Jesus to take all your sins on Himself. You remember John 3:16? "God so loved the world......"? Replace the word "world" with your name. "God so loved me..." That is the truth. The people God has a problem with are those who won't accept that they are sinners.

    "Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

    “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

    “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

    Lord Jesus died for people just like you. Accept Him and allow Him to be your Lord and your life. Then you can rest in the fact that God loves you and that you accepted in the beloved. In reality, there is only one person's view that matters. And that is Almighty God. If He accepts you, then those who reject you have a problem with God. He's on your side.
     
  19. Hopeful37

    Hopeful37 Active Member

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    Beauty is something that starts within the heart and radiates outwards. I've met some beautiful people and because they didn't have a good heart, they weren't appealing at all and I've met some not so attractive people that had beautiful hearts and it far surpassed their looks. In fact, they were beautiful to me. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Stop looking at your physical imperfections. Let beauty grow and shine from the inside.

    The Cracked Pot • Moral Stories
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2020
  20. Hopeful37

    Hopeful37 Active Member

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    There was a farmer who grew excellent quality corn. Every year he won the award for the best corn. One year a newspaper reporter interviewed him and learned something interesting about how he grew it. The reporter discovered that the farmer shared his seeds with his neighbours.

    “How can you afford to share your best seed corn with your neighbours when they are entering in competition with yours each year?” the reporter asked.

    “Why sir,” said the farmer, “Don’t you know? The wind picks up pollen from the ripening corn and swirls it from field to field. If my neighbours grow inferior corn, cross-pollination will steadily degrade the quality of my corn. If I am to grow good corn, I must help my neighbours grow good corn.”

    So it is with our lives. Those who want to live meaningfully and well must help enrich the lives of others, for the value of a life is measured by the lives it touches. The quality of response and joy depends on the quality of thoughts and love we share and spread.

    And those who choose to be joyful must help others find happiness, for the welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all.
     
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