Can Christians divorce?

Tree of Life

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Pagan marriages are valid according to scripture. And any divorce and remarriage is adultery. Married = married for life regardless.

Thanks for re-expressing your view. Could you comment on the pastoral implications of the above scenario? What are our moral obligations to each other? If you're our pastor, how would you council us to move forward?
 
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Dave L

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Thanks for re-expressing your view. Could you comment on the pastoral implications of the above scenario? What are our moral obligations to each other? If you're our pastor, how would you council us to move forward?
Marriage is for life. Divorce = unforgiveness and is not included as an option under the NT. And any subsequent remarriage is adultery.
 
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nanookadenord

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Divorce = unforgiveness. Remarriage after divorce = adultery.

Do you have scripture that says that?

I was divorced by my ex-wife, she said I didn't make her happy. She has since started living with another boyfriend. We're amicable and rarely have issues.

I have forgiven her. I don't hold onto unforgiveness as it takes too much energy to do so. Basically it's a grudge. I am quick to forgive.

My ex-wife has forgiven me as well. However, we know that we aren't meant to be together. We're toxic together. So, we will not get back together. There is no such thing as a legal separation in my state.

So, since I am the innocent one in that I didn't divorce her I am indeed going to remarry. I am not going to stay alone the rest of my life because I was divorced by my ex-wife. Divorce is not even the unforgivable sin, nor is remarriage even though some Christians try to make it out to be.
 
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Tree of Life

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Marriage is for life. Divorce = unforgiveness and is not included as an option under the NT. And any subsequent remarriage is adultery.

I don't think it's necessary to keep expressing your view. We get that this is what you believe. Are you able to actually apply this view to a real life situation like the one I described? Or do you prefer to keep it at the level of a platitude?
 
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Dave L

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I don't think it's necessary to keep expressing your view. We get that this is what you believe. Are you able to actually apply this view to a real life situation like the one I described? Or do you just enjoy platitudes?
I've seen pastors stand firm on this. One Reformed Church I'm familiar with called a synod to settle the matter. About a member who divorced as an unbeliever and wanted to remarry under church membership. They forbid the practice and have a low divorce rate in their membership.
 
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Tree of Life

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I've seen pastors stand firm on this. One Reformed Church I'm familiar with called a synod to settle the matter. About a member who divorced as an unbeliever and wanted to remarry under church membership. They forbid the practice and have a low divorce rate in their membership.

Forbidding remarriage is one thing. But what about the person who has already remarried? What should they do?
 
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Dave L

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Forbidding remarriage is one thing. But what about the person who has already remarried? What should they do?
Personally, I would separate but offer financial support. Just as divorced couples do, only with a loving motive.
 
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Dave L

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What if they've been with their new spouse for 10 years and have three kids? Should they still separate and break up their family?
People in this situation divorce for bad reasons all the time. I would divorce for good reasons.
 
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Tree of Life

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People in this situation divorce for bad reasons all the time. I would divorce for good reasons.

So your view that divorce is impossible actually leads to more divorce and can lead to an even more devastating situation of breaking up a family with kids. What do you think about how your view leads to some very strange results?
 
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Dave L

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So your view that divorce is impossible actually leads to more divorce and can lead to an even more devastating situation of breaking up a family with kids. What do you think about how your view leads to some very strange results?
It's better for the husband and wife to repent and separate than to live in willful sin. The kids would still have love and support from both.
 
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Tree of Life

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It's better for the husband and wife to repent and separate than to live in willful sin. The kids would still have love and support from both.

But you said earlier that second marriages were real marriages. You said that people who remarry have multiple spouses. How is it okay to divorce someone who is a real spouse?
 
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Dave L

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But you said earlier that second marriages were real marriages. You said that people who remarry have multiple spouses. How is it okay to divorce someone who is a real spouse?
They are still married, but separated in loving repentance.
 
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Tree of Life

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They are still married, but separated in loving repentance.

So it seems like you kindof made that up. If they are married, then why should they separate? How would their state of marriage be "living in sin", as you say?
 
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Dave L

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So it seems like you kindof made that up. If they are married, then why should they separate? How would their state of marriage be "living in sin", as you say?
They are committing adultery. They are not if separated.
 
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