Bumpersnickers

[Jim B]

I love bumper stickers. There’s a lot of fun in them and sometimes a lot of wisdom. I sometimes tell my congregation (jokingly, of course ) that all the theology I ever learned I learned from bumper stickers.

What are some of your favorite BS slogans?

Here are some of mine:

Honk if you love peace and quiet
Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window
Honk if you want to see my finger
My Child Was Inmate of the Month
Research causes cancer in rats​

And here’s some more I got a kick out of

Jesus loves Darwin

Too many people are looking for a work-free drug place
Be All You’re Told to Be
Only you can prevent narcissism.
Laugh alone and the world thinks you’re an idiot
I brake for tailgaters (then I sue)
Warning! Driver only carries $20 in ammunition​

Jim
\o/

 

[Andry]

Thanks Jim, something on the lighter side:

- Sacred cows make the best burgers.
- Oh look, just 2,875,265 days till I start caring what you think.
- My child sold your Honor Student the answers to the test.
- Either shut up, or render me unconscious
- Your village called. Their missing an idiot.
- I am a Canadian. It's like an American but without a gun.

 

[Jim B]

Thanks andry,

I have to forewarn you, these go in our church newsletter every week. heh heh

Love your selection. I also like the one that says "My child beat up your honor roll student."

Those "My Child is an Honor Roll Student" stickers sound very pretentious to those of us whose kids and grandkids, well, aren't.

Jim

 

[Trish1947]

I saw one yesterday.


"CALL ME ON MY CELL PHONE
IF YOU LOVE JESUS."

 

[Big Mouth Nana]

If You Can Read This
You Are To Close

My Other Car Has Two Wheels

Honk If You Have Nothing Better To Do.

Incase Of The Rapture
Don't Be In Front Of This Car

My Child Beat Up Your Honor Student

My Husband And I Divorced Over Religious Differances
He Thought He Was God...I Didn't

This One I Loved. It Showed The Jesus Fish Swallowing The Darwin Sign

 

[LynneClomina]

As a former fetus, i oppose abortion

if you can read this, you are too close -(i'm trying to find one of those for my mom's car.)

i like the Jesus fish eating the darwin fish, too.

Don't drive faster than your guardian angel can fly

Choose Life - your mother did

 

[plum]

"Even Jesus loves tailgaters, But don't make him prove it." (not the wittiest, but i made it up myself)

 

[Trish1947]

Even Darwin Knows That God Created The Earth..(now!)


God Does Not Call The Qualified.
He Qualifies The Called.

Hows My Driving?....pray!

I'm A Nice Guy... My Car Is Evil.

I Is A College Student.

 

[pimorton]

I haven't seen it yet, but I want it on my car:

"I'd rather you were bowling, boating or golfing too."

 

[skeptic7]

I don't know if its a bumper sticker but i want it....
"The Dixie Chicks Are in the Trunk"

(in response to the whole 'earl is in the trunk' thing, incase you didnt' know"

and then....

"If god didn't intend for us to eat animals, then why did he give them meat?"

 

[Big Mouth Nana]

Even Darwin Knows That God Created The Earth..(now!)


God Does Not Call The Qualified.
He Qualifies The Called.

Hows My Driving?....pray!

I'm A Nice Guy... My Car Is Evil.

I Is A College Student.

I Is A College Student, LOL? I Ain't saw that won yet, butt would luv to have it, rofl.

 

[Andry]

inappropriate content

 

[LynneClomina]

edited quote from original poster

 

[mister_p]

I enjoyed these! I do our church's newsletter and I might use a few of these.

Is this in the Spirit-Filled section as the others too serious? Or are we just silly?

(Only joking - Don't hurt me!)

 

[J.A.I]

I LOVE this one....

I brake for tailgaters (then I sue)

That is SO something I would say lol

"If god didn't intend for us to eat animals, then why did he give them meat?"

The version I heard was:
If God didn't intent for us to eat animals, why did He make them from meat ?

 

[TheScottsMen]

Just stuck one on my car

"Exposure to Son may prevent burning"

 

[Paula]

"If we quit voting, will they all go away?"

"My hockey mom can beat up your soccer mom."

"The more you complain, the longer God makes you live."

"Honk if anything falls off."

"Stop reading my bumper sticker and watch the road."

 

[New_Wineskin]

One that I have heard of :

You're driving a car. It isn't a telephone
booth, a beauty parlor or a restaurant.

I would personally put another one underneath that said :
It's not a library , either ... stop reading bumper stickers and keep your eyes on the road !

 

[Trish1947]

God allows U-Turns.

Preach the Gospel
Use words if you have too.

God Grades on the Cross
Not the Curve.

Don't let this car fool you.
My treasure is in Heaven.

 

[SpiritPsalmist]

"Go ahead and tailgate me. . .I need the money"

"I'm too sexy for my hair that's why it is'nt there"