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Born again ,but then lead again to the same old life style

Discussion in 'Requests for Christian Advice' started by ovis90, Aug 28, 2018.

  1. ovis90

    ovis90 Member

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    I accepted Jesus christ to my life and for some time my life was really changed.. I was so much with fire of Holy Spirit.I used to love to speak to others about God how he change my life. I was also a missionary abroad.But then I went to live in other country after my mission to a small town where I was going crazy.There was nothing to do except computer or shopping or clubs. I met a christian at church which in UK is normal to go for a beer and after we went once. I started feeling tempted to go look for girls in the clubs because I am single. Although that day I didn't went ,but i went other day and i used to feel dirty after. I felt it was like battle in my self.. go or not to go. After this battle in my self I stopped,but then I could say i had to choose very important path in my life stay living in UK or return home. I got almost depressed and I watched porn although I knew it was wrong ,but i felt strong temptation. Later on I just returned to my addiction, it was like in roller coasters. Then i made a dessicion to stop and almost for a year i havent returned to the same path. I asked for many times and i realize i made such a big mistake. I asked for Gods forgiveness so many times. But I still don't feel the same close to him any more. What do i do wrong? I noticed i sometimes i feel envy or other things of the flesh. How do i return living a life by the spirit once again? I feel also a a lot of distractions in my life.
     
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  2. Dave L

    Dave L Well-Known Member Supporter

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    QUOTE="ovis90, post: 73113590, member: 377565"]I accepted Jesus christ to my life and for some time my life was really changed.. I was so much with fire of Holy Spirit.I used to love to speak to others about God how he change my life. I was also a missionary abroad.But then I went to live in other country after my mission to a small town where I was going crazy.There was nothing to do except computer or shopping or clubs. I met a christian at church which in UK is normal to go for a beer and after we went once. I started feeling tempted to go look for girls in the clubs because I am single. Although that day I didn't went ,but i went other day and i used to feel dirty after. I felt it was like battle in my self.. go or not to go. After this battle in my self I stopped,but then I could say i had to choose very important path in my life stay living in UK or return home. I got almost depressed and I watched porn although I knew it was wrong ,but i felt strong temptation. Later on I just returned to my addiction, it was like in roller coasters. Then i made a dessicion to stop and almost for a year i havent returned to the same path. I asked for many times and i realize i made such a big mistake. I asked for Gods forgiveness so many times. But I still don't feel the same close to him any more. What do i do wrong? I noticed i sometimes i feel envy or other things of the flesh. How do i return living a life by the spirit once again? I feel also a a lot of distractions in my life.[/QUOTE]
    The battle is in the mind. Learn to censor every thought and imagination. Allowing only those that harmonize with Christ. Paul says:

    “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds, Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;” (2 Corinthians 10:3–5)

    He also says:

    “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” (Philippians 4:8)
     
  3. Ken Rank

    Ken Rank Well-Known Member Supporter

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    In the story of Naaman (2 Kings 5) we see a transformation in him. Long story short (and do read it) he came to realize that he was about to go back to his master, his king, who was the head of a very pagan nation. In fact, he knew he would have to go back into the idols temple and perhaps even bow. He asked the prophet Elisha what to do... and after considering it, Elisha said, "Go in peace."

    What Elisha recognized here was that Naaman had about enough for one day. One isn't going to change everything about himself over night... it is a process that pretty much lasts a lifetime. Elisha wasn't condoning Naaman going into an idols temple.... but he also knew that Naaman was on overload and any more righteous information would have pushed him over the top.

    My point in sharing this is I hear Naaman in your words. I think you have placed a great deal of pressure on your self stemming from your own expectations. I am not saying go to the bar, and I am not saying turn on porn, but I am saying to give yourself a break. You're not going to hell because of your humanity... but what you can do is learn from all of this. Keep God on your mind, your heart, and your lips... and go in peace.
     
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  4. Stringfellow_Hawke

    Stringfellow_Hawke Active Member

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    Its funny you have said this and I have stumbled upon it. I have a similar problem as the OP.
     
  5. ovis90

    ovis90 Member

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    It was a bit similar I would say it was the most time when I felt i was lead by spirit and had very close relationship with Jesus. I was asking for mission while living abroad and I meet mormon missionaries which I tried by the bible to show them. That it contradicts with the bible there teachings. Later it happened that it made me even confused and all this lonliness lead me to go to bars and my weakness for beautiful girls...but now I am living in other country so far from the bars and clubs. But still not easy with other distractions.
     
  6. Ken Rank

    Ken Rank Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Years ago I looked at daily Jewish prayer as "vain repetition and babbling." But it isn't, I was wrong... and what I have learned as I have grown is that the Jewish people (who do this) begin and end the day in prayer... they begin and end the day with the Lord on their minds, hearts and lips. I would suggest you do the same... and also, make sure you read a couple of chapters. Might I suggest going to Genesis and giving a fresh read about Joseph's life (Genesis chapter 37 to end of book). Notice not only the hardships and how he is blessed in the end, but also the TIME between blessings. It is a story that should help us to remain patient and know, that the Lord is in control.

    Blessings Ovis.
    Ken
     
  7. oldrunner

    oldrunner Member Supporter

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    Maybe you should seek a wife? I think many times we think full time Christian service is the only way to serve God. When in reality, we can serve God whatever of position in the body of Christ. Most men struggle with the lust of the flesh and a wife can ease this burden. Once we have viewed porn it is very hard to get out of our minds. :(

    But God is a God of fresh starts! :oldthumbsup: Hang in there and don't be double minded!

    Lam 3:18  I said, "My strength has perished, along with my expectation from Yahweh." 

    Lam 3:19  Remember my affliction and my misery, the wormwood and the bitterness. 

    Lam 3:20  My soul still remembers them, and is bowed down within me. 

    Lam 3:21  This I recall to my mind; therefore I have hope. 

    Lam 3:22  It is because of Yahweh’s loving kindnesses that we are not consumed, because his compassion doesn’t fail. 

    Lam 3:23  They are new every morning. Great is your faithfulness. 

    Lam 3:24  "Yahweh is my portion," says my soul. "Therefore I will hope in him." 

    Lam 3:25  Yahweh is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. 


    Psa 37:24  Though he stumble, he shall not fall, for Yahweh holds him up with his hand. 

    Php 3:12  Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. 

    Php 3:13  Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 

    Php 3:14  I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. 

    Php 3:15  Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind; and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal even this to you. 

    1Co 7:2  Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 

    :amen:
     
  8. oldrunner

    oldrunner Member Supporter

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    After just going for a run, it's right in front of me! :doh: Start training and wear yourself out! I can speak for experience. You run enough, you'll be so tired, you can't think straight. :oldthumbsup: A lot of time to think about God when running too.

    We are talking probably about 12 hours of training per week, twice a day most times, and go long for about 2-3 hrs, once a week on a single run. Pros do 100+ miles per week- but they run real fast. ;) But if you can work up to about 12 hours, that will probably do it. Not tired enough? Run more. Be careful to start slow and add mileage a little at a time if you try it.

    Here's a song I was thinking about for you out running! :)

     
  9. Grand_Commander_Zhou_Ziyu

    Grand_Commander_Zhou_Ziyu New Member

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    I hear you, and as a single Christian struggling with sexual urges and temptations, I've been trying very hard to combat the lusts and fetishes I have. I know I won't be able to love my wife with all my heart and soul if there are distractions and deviations from what God intends as the healthy expression of male-female relationships and sex. I used to be a bit addicted to pornography as well, but now I've mostly overcome it and no longer feel an urge to view most pornography, though foot fetish / femdom still gets me at times. However, I haven't watched anything that's very explicitly / typically pornographic for almost two years. I pray, through my words and my writing, that you will be able to be return to the Lord and be close in your walk with Him. Amen from a Chinese believer.
     
  10. EagleScout88

    EagleScout88 New Member Supporter

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    Hello Ovis90, thank you so much for sharing your heart with us. I want to encourage you by letting you know that everything that you are dealing with can be overcome! I struggled with the same things when I was single, and I have been happily married for eleven years with four children.

    As a single person, I always thought that “I’m not married”, so all those things in the bible about adultery don’t apply to me. One of the biggest lessons that I had to learn was that even though I was single, I was married to Christ. That meant that when I “looked at a woman lustfully” I committed adultery with her in my heart(Matthew 5:27-30 NIV). I looked at my life and found that there were things that I could do to protect myself from temptation. I installed a program that would block inappropriate websites, I fasted from cable television (ultimately disconnecting), and unplugging the television in my hotel room.

    As time went on, I spent more time reading God’s Word, in Prayer, and with His People (the Body of Christ). I started longing for a wife; the problem was that I was looking in the wrong places (i.e. dance clubs). God then revealed to me through his Holy Spirit that I first needed to focus on Christ and being loyal and committed to Him, and then He would be faithful and meet my need for a wife. Before long, I met my wife at church.

    I know how hard it is to eliminate some of the sin from our lives, so please know that I will be praying for you. Specifically that God will equip you with His full armor (Ephesians 6:10-20): the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the helmet of salvation, the shoes of the good news of the gospel of peace, the shield of faith, and the sword of the Spirit (the Word of God). God Bless You!

    Psalm 91.
     
  11. Invalidusername

    Invalidusername Well-Known Member

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    I'm in the exact same situation except maybe worse. I pray and pray and pray and God does not answer. I feel as if I am unregenerate again and have no choice but live to my sinful nature. I have a big gaping hole in my chest and all of my repentance has been by my own efforts.
     
  12. oldrunner

    oldrunner Member Supporter

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    Brother, you have a choice if you are a born again believer. I've been there. :(

    Usually when we dabble in sin, it will only get worse. If we feed the flesh the flesh will grow strong. If we feed the spirit, it will grow strong.

    Paul struggled, we all do. Read Romans 6-8. This is how you overcome the Flesh. It is a choice not to let sin reign over us. We are free in Christ! :oldthumbsup:


    Rom 8:5  For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. 

    Rom 8:6  For the mind of the flesh is death, but the mind of the Spirit is life and peace; 

    Rom 8:7  because the mind of the flesh is hostile towards God; for it is not subject to God’s law, neither indeed can it be. 

    The battle is in the mind! Working out will help some, but it's your thought process you have to change. Body follows brain.


    The first step is repentance:

    Turn a 180, confess your sins. Very important. First step always. Go to God and start with a clean slate.

    1Jn 1:9  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 


    The second step is get 100% back to what you were doing when you were strong:

    A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. (James 1:8) God wants total commitment, otherwise it won't work. He will see through this. We deceive ourselves if we think we can play with sin, or lie to God. Our path will be crooked.

    Prayer, reading a lot of Bible, Christian music, hiding the Word in your heart, fellowship. Doing deep Bible study will really occupy your mind and cleanse it. Go through all the doctrines of the Bible! Getting your mind back on God and out of the flesh and world, is where you get strong. It's like the Gym for Christians. :)

    The third step is stay vigilant:

    This is a battle we are in! Stay the course! Stay on the path of righteous, don't go or associate with people that will bring you down. Very important! Better to have one good righteous Christian brother, than ten luke warm ones. Get away from them! Sever bad relationships that make you stray.

    Study Proverbs, and meditate on Psalm 119. It's the longest chapter in the Bible and the whole thing is about the word of God. So that shows you how important the Word is to get into your head/heart.

    Pro 3:5  Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 

    Pro 3:6  In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. 

    Pro 3:7  Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the LORD and depart from evil. 

    Pro 3:8  It will be health to your flesh, And strength to your bones.

    Psa 119:9  How can a young man cleanse his way? By taking heed according to Your word. 

    Psa 119:10  With my whole heart I have sought You; Oh, let me not wander from Your commandments! 

    Psa 119:11  Your word I have hidden in my heart, That I might not sin against You.

    Lets Pray: :prayer: Lord I pray for these brothers who are struggling with sin. Bind the evil one in their lives that they may turn back toward You with a whole heart. Let them do the first things they did when they first loved You. Renew the joy of their salvation and guide their feet on the path of righteousness for Your name sake. In Jesus name we pray! Amen! :amen: Hang in there!
     
     
  13. GandalfTheWise

    GandalfTheWise In search of lost causes and hopeless battles

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    The gospel really has two parts. Christians often miss the second part. The first part we know well; Christ died for our sins, we are forgiven, put into a right relationship with God, adopted as children, etc. We know this well. However, we often pass over the second part. We are new creations in Christ; God has put His Spirit in us, we are His workmanship created for good works in Christ. This has a deeper, more profound, and more powerful meaning than we give it credit for. This speaks of God actually transforming us into new creations, not us trying as hard as we can to act like new creations.

    Paul (in Gal 5:22-23) describes characteristics such as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control as *fruit* of the Spirit. He does not call these commands to be pursued. Jesus said "Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." (John 15:4-5)

    We often become impatient. When we don't see fruit right away, we assume that there is something wrong and try to short circuit the process to get fruit right away. Fruit comes from long term growth. It comes from abiding in Christ. Fruit does not immediately appear overnight; it sprouts and grows over time. Often, our attention gets focused on eliminating sin rather than growing. Many Christians end up agonizing over verses such as I John 3:5-6 (5 But you know that he appeared so that he might take away our sins. And in him is no sin. 6 No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.) Verses such as these are *promises* of what God intends our new life to be, of what He is working toward in our lives, and that it is accomplished by living in Him. When we take them as commands to be kept in our own strength or as warnings not to fall short, we set ourselves up for failure and unhealthy fear.

    We abide in Christ and grow spiritually over time. It is consistent communion with God (via prayer, worship, meditation), Bible reading and study, fellowship, and other such things that help us grow spiritually faster than if we don't. We also each need to realize we are unique individuals and what these things should be in our lives is different than others (and may change as we grow). Some pray best in the morning; some at night; some throughout the day. Some read a few verses and meditate on them; others read chapters per day. We each need to find the most natural and fruitful way to walk with God that He meant for us right now, not try to copy what someone else is doing. We can get ideas and input from others, but we need to learn to walk with God ourselves as the unique individuals He created us to be. Our trust and confidence (i.e. faith) in God slowly grows over time as we see what He does in our lives and others' lives. It is over weeks, months, and years of that we really start to see the real harvest of fruit.

    With regard to sin, my observation is that there seem to be 3 general sources of sins in a Christian's life. 1. There are the things that we easily change. We figure out that something is not spiritually healthy for us and we just quit doing it. 2. There are the things that change because we are maturing and growing spiritually. As we grow, these things just naturally improve in our lives. Often they are related to things based on the fruit of the Spirit. 3. There are deep bondages and burdens and lies that are buried deep within us that require God's healing and deliverance. Things such as addictions, compulsive behaviors, unhealthy emotional and spiritual patterns that overwhelm us. Sometimes these are tied to deep spiritual and emotional injuries and pain that needs to be healed. The reality is that many Christians carry burdens from such things as trauma and abuse that need God's healing. If we have a broken leg, it's pretty hard to run, jump, and dance. Our focus becomes on trying to run, jump, and dance and getting better crutches than on the leg healing. We often have spiritual and emotional broken "legs" that prevent us from living as God wants that require His healing. Now, it is often wise to do things to mitigate unhealthy behavior to prevent more damage (e.g. keeping an alcoholic away from alcohol as much as possible), but complete freedom from the addiction can come with God's healing work. It's a matter of following Him where He directs and working on what He wants.

    Parts of our Christian life we can trivially decide to do and carry out in our own strength; However, much of our Christian life comes through God empowering spiritual growth and being changed and transformed.
     
  14. Invalidusername

    Invalidusername Well-Known Member

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    I've turned from my sins but there's a void now. It's like God has left me. I don't sense his call like I used to.
     
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  15. oldrunner

    oldrunner Member Supporter

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    It takes time, like the poster above says. It's like love in marriage: Sometimes we have really strong feelings for our wife, sometimes they are not as strong. But it's a commitment to keep walking with God. Feelings will ebb and flow in our walk, we will have mountain top and valleys, but God is still faithful. :) Hang in there! :oldthumbsup:
     
  16. Invalidusername

    Invalidusername Well-Known Member

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    I hope you're right. I will keep going. Hopefully someday God rewards me for seeking Him.
     
  17. Mountainmanbob

    Mountainmanbob Goat Whisperer Supporter

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    Although we all deal with sin backsliding can be a very dangerous situation.

    Self-examination with the help of the Holy Spirit is of most importance.

    Doing nasty things should make us feel sick inside -- grieving the Holy Spirit.

    Repentance is such a refreshing thing.

    Although tempted at times we should not crave the things of this world.

    M-Bob
     
  18. Dan61861

    Dan61861 7 days without God, makes one weak.

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    Rest in Christ. Our flesh will never please God. Our hope is not in ourselves, in our righteousness. Our hope is in Christ. Jesus made it clear, you cannot mix the old (covenant) with the new (covenant). Our flesh is already dead, buried with Christ.

    Surrender your sin to Jesus, His burden is light. Confess them, He is sure to forgive you. Blessed are the humble, we are all sinners, we humble ourselves before a Holy God. Read the word everyday, it will strengthen your faith. Pray each day. Cleave unto Christ, he is our righteousness, our hope.

    Cain's sacrifice was rejected while Able's was accepted. Cain offered the best of his works to the Lord. Able offered a lamb, looking forward to seeing his redeemer.

    In Christ
    Daniel
     
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