I am a youth leader at a non-denominational church that just branched off of Calvary Chapel. I am 27 year old woman and my father in law is the youth pastor. I was asked by a youth on Tuesday if I would baptize her. She is shy and has only connected with me so far and at youth is basically my shadow. She will likely not want my father in law to do it. My father in law was instantly excited when I told him what she asked me and we were going to ask the pastor if I could do it soon. The pastor was very abrupt with me when I asked (my father in law was still walking up and had missed the first part of the convo.) My pastor said I am not to be doing the baptisms! I don't understand. I've been told Calvanists are a very male dominated church is this why? I don't really know what to do. He then told my father in law he wants him to do the baptisms. And my father in law agreed missing a part of the convo he did not know what had just been said. I just talked to him today and he was like WHAT? You can to! Now I'm torn between two of my coverings... what do I do? My FIL wants to talk to the pastor and sort it out between the two of them but I feel like I just back stabbed my pastor and so I almost want to talk to him my self and explain to him that I feel capable and that I disagree with his decision. I even kinda want him to go to the elders and ask their opinions at this point. Is this me being prideful and controlling? What would you do or say?