Badly need advice

[Lostgirl28]

Hi.I am in a relationship with the same sex, but want a renew life as i know from the very start that samesex is a sin.My problem is i cant leave her because she needed me, she is my bestfried before the relationship started and she harms herself everytime i tried to ,specially her mom has a cancer now and we both miles away from our family because we are working in abroad.I asked God to give me a sign, and if her mom will not continue with chemo ill break the relationship, but her mom is on chemo now.what should i do? Thanks

 

[I'm_Sorry]

Hi.I am in a relationship with the same sex, but want a renew life as i know from the very start that samesex is a sin.My problem is i cant leave her because she needed me, she is my bestfried before the relationship started and she harms herself everytime i tried to ,specially her mom has a cancer now and we both miles away from our family because we are working in abroad.I asked God to give me a sign, and if her mom will not continue with chemo ill break the relationship, but her mom is on chemo now.what should i do? Thanks

Maintain the friendship and abandon the sexual sin.

If there are threats of suicide and attempts, you cant play around with this, call the paramedics every-time its threatened or attempted.

It could be emotional manipulation or it could be the real deal.

If you want to renew your life in Christ, pray pray pray.

Stop the sin explain to her why you are stopping it.

 

[Far Side Of the Moon]

Maintain the friendship and abandon the sexual sin.

If there are threats of suicide and attempts, you cant play around with this, call the paramedics every-time its threatened or attempted.

It could be emotional manipulation or it could be the real deal.

If you want to renew your life in Christ, pray pray pray.

Stop the sin explain to her why you are stopping it.

Best advice. Caring and information.

 

[No.5]

Hi Lostgirl28,

Yes it does seem like you are in a very difficult situation and not just you but your friend and her family too. I agree with what I'm_Sorry said and I would just suggest one more thing; support group, preferably from your own church. If you have not found a church, please do look for one (a bible-believing one) and do share your troubles with them. I truly believe support from a group of christians who can be physically present with you and your friend can make a world of a difference. And the church can help pray for your friend's mom too. Will be praying for you.

 

[Lostgirl28]

Hi Lostgirl28,

Yes it does seem like you are in a very difficult situation and not just you but your friend and her family too. I agree with what I'm_Sorry said and I would just suggest one more thing; support group, preferably from your own church. If you have not found a church, please do look for one (a bible-believing one) and do share your troubles with them. I truly believe support from a group of christians who can be physically present with you and your friend can make a world of a difference. And the church can help pray for your friend's mom too. Will be praying for you.

Hi Lostgirl28,

Yes it does seem like you are in a very difficult situation and not just you but your friend and her family too. I agree with what I'm_Sorry said and I would just suggest one more thing; support group, preferably from your own church. If you have not found a church, please do look for one (a bible-believing one) and do share your troubles with them. I truly believe support from a group of christians who can be physically present with you and your friend can make a world of a difference. And the church can help pray for your friend's mom too. Will be praying for you.

 

[Ken Rank]

Maintain the friendship and abandon the sexual sin.

This is good advice... simple, caring, and if she can't understand your need to separate the two, then whether she was a she or he... that is a HUGE red flag in terms of maturity and in regards to thinking about the other.

 

[Lostgirl28]

Hi Lostgirl28,

Yes it does seem like you are in a very difficult situation and not just you but your friend and her family too. I agree with what I'm_Sorry said and I would just suggest one more thing; support group, preferably from your own church. If you have not found a church, please do look for one (a bible-believing one) and do share your troubles with them. I truly believe support from a group of christians who can be physically present with you and your friend can make a world of a difference. And the church can help pray for your friend's mom too. Will be praying for you.

Hi thank you very much. We do have boble groups and we are both workers actually in the church before this happened to us.problem now i am afraid of judgement and condemnation and she doesnt care with other people says, it looks like she doesnt wsnt to change her descision with our samesex relationship, that is why she hurts herself for me to stay.im getting crazy now because it hurts me to see her suffering everytime i tried to ho away.wsnts to kill myself for me to end this.

 

[Lostgirl28]

This is good advice... simple, caring, and if she can't understand your need to separate the two, then whether she was a she or he... that is a HUGE red flag in terms of maturity and in regards to thinking about the other.

Thank you.so much.pls.pray for us.

 

[I'm_Sorry]

that is why she hurts herself for me to stay.im getting crazy now because it hurts me to see her suffering everytime i tried to ho away.wsnts to kill myself for me to end this.

This is very problematic.

If you stay she will become even more needy and you cant fulfill that need.

Its God's role for both of you.

He's First.

You have to end it and you will need police and paramedic assistance to do it depending on how extreme she wants to manipulate you into staying.

This happens in hetro relationships too.

If her mother is dying this is a very bad time, and a cocktail for disaster.

Seek professional help here.

 

[lastofall]

[for me anyway] if we know that we are committing sin and we repent not, then that is another sin; so we are only proceeding from sin to sin: we must put a halt to it and turn away from it, and there is no alternative to repenting and owning our sin. Circumstances have nothing to do with doing what is right according to the will of God: if we truly believe in Him, then we will deny (disown) our own will, and submit to and rely upon His will, and that is all that remains, and nothing wavering.

 

[Lostgirl28]

This is very problematic.

If you stay she will become even more needy and you cant fulfill that need.

Its God's role for both of you.

He's First.

You have to end it and you will need police and paramedic assistance to do it depending on how extreme she wants to manipulate you into staying.

This happens in hetro relationships too.

If her mother is dying this is a very bad time, and a cocktail for disaster.

Seek professional help here.

Thank you so much.yes her mother is dying that is why i dont know the timing to say it to her that i want to end the relationship.it is like double bomb for her.i am in a very difficult situation, i am actually getting crazy and to think we are both far from home.

 

[Ken Rank]

[for me anyway] if we know that we are committing sin and we repent not, then that is another sin;

Not meaning to correct, just wanting to put the proper word here. We all sin in the sense that we might at some point do something unknowingly or unintentional. But when we understand that something is sin, we repent and are forgiven. But when we know something is a sin and we don't repent of it... it ceases being sin and becomes rebellion. In other words, if I know what target God would have me aim at and I choose to ignore Him and aim at an entirely different target on purpose... then that is rebellion.

In thinking about this some more... I might suggest asking her to move into her mom's house and take care of her.... that will take the weight off it being a "breakup" and give you ( @Lostgirl28 ) the room you need to regroup and move on.

 

[Lostgirl28]

[for me anyway] if we know that we are committing sin and we repent not, then that is another sin; so we are only proceeding from sin to sin: we must put a halt to it and turn away from it, and there is no alternative to repenting and owning our sin. Circumstances have nothing to do with doing what is right according to the will of God: if we truly believe in Him, then we will deny (disown) our own will, and submit to and rely upon His will, and that is all that remains, and nothing wavering.

Than you. Ill take your advice

 

[I'm_Sorry]

Thank you so much.yes her mother is dying that is why i dont know the timing to say it to her that i want to end the relationship.it is like double bomb for her.i am in a very difficult situation, i am actually getting crazy and to think we are both far from home.

Hmm, It will be worse if her mum dies.

Lets see what other members suggest.

Its a web for sure.

 

[Lostgirl28]

Not meaning to correct, just wanting to put the proper word here. We all sin in the sense that we might at some point do something unknowingly or unintentional. But when we understand that something is sin, we repent and are forgiven. But when we know something is a sin and we don't repent of it... it ceases being sin and becomes rebellion. In other words, if I know what target God would have me aim at and I choose to ignore Him and aim at an entirely different target on purpose... then that is rebellion.

In thinking about this some more... I might suggest asking her to move into her mom's house and take care of her.... that will take the weight off it being a "breakup" and give you ( @Lostgirl28 ) the room you need to regroup and move on.

Thank you.She cant move to her mom, she is the one providing the money for the therapy therefor she cant go back to her home, i think its better for me to leave the country we are working and return home to my family and forget about her .I just need a prayer that God will give me strength and not to look back even she will hurt her self. I dont know if its the right thing to do, its just hurts me to much that i will hurt someone and not only someone but bestfriend, i am sorry for telling all of you this, i just want someone to talk to.thank you

 

[Lostgirl28]

Hmm, It will be worse if her mum dies.

Lets see what other members suggest.

Its a web for sure.

Yes thank you.that is why i am getting crazy.God knows i dont want to hurt someone specially her my bestfriend, and i dont know if i can leave like that, but i know we need to stop.Thank you for spending your time really appreciate, i havnt talk to anyone regarding thism

 

[I'm_Sorry]

Thank you.She cant move to her mom, she is the one providing the money for the therapy therefor she cant go back to her home, i think its better for me to leave the country we are working and return home to my family and forget about her .I just need a prayer that God will give me strength and not to look back even she will hurt her self. I dont know if its the right thing to do, its just hurts me to much that i will hurt someone and not only someone but bestfriend, i am sorry for telling all of you this, i just want someone to talk to.thank you

Its ok, that's what we are here for.

If you cut it quickly it may turn out better.

But you need to be prepared that it may not work out and something bad may happen.

In any case repent repent repent, pray pray pray.

 

[Lostgirl28]

Its ok, that's what we are here for.

If you cut it quickly it may turn out better.

But you need to be prepared that it may not work out and something bad may happen.

In any case repent repent repent, pray pray pray.

Yes thank you.pls.pray for us.

 

[I'm_Sorry]

Yes thank you.that is why i am getting crazy.God knows i dont want to hurt someone specially her my bestfriend, and i dont know if i can leave like that, but i know we need to stop.Thank you for spending your time really appreciate, i havnt talk to anyone regarding thism

Its ok, I understand the predicament.

There is one other way but it probably wont work. And that's for you to stay and cut the sexual intimacy.

Just be prepared to stand your ground and say I no longer want to live a same sex life, it was error.

 

[I'm_Sorry]

Yes thank you.pls.pray for us.

I am.