Are You in Darkness? Pain? Feeling Lost?

[CindyisHis]

I lost my post. CF had difficulties.

Moriah, I'm not planning on leaving. I haven't been here much because of my schedule, and it will be that way for a little while yet. As long as Christians are here there is light. The Lord has me here, and that's that. At least for now.

Did you write the poem? It sounds like you. The talent shows. So does the pain.

Thank You Jesus, for delivering the captive. Thank You for giving us authority over the all the power of the enemy.

PC4, reps for praying, and what's more only the reward the Lord can give. May it be as seed in your own life. I pray for a great harvest for you.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

your post showed up on the previous page, and i responded there as well, go read.
<===========

 

[CindyisHis]

your post showed up on the previous page, and i responded there as well, go read.
<===========

Yeah, I see it now. This kooky thing!

 

[CindyisHis]

No, it's actually a song by Casting Crowns. If you click on the words you can download the Mp3 from some church site.



sometimes... BUT ...

I think it's that "but" that's holding you there.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

you don't know what's in the "but" though. the but contains all the things about which i do NOT get a choice.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

one of these days i should make a list of everything in that "but"... if i'd thought anyone cared i might have tried to do so before. but usually people hear one or two things in that "but" and they are ready to judge and cast stones. i don't need that right now. i know where to find stones and i know how to slam myself against them.

 

[CindyisHis]

you don't know what's in the "but" though. the but contains all the things about which i do NOT get a choice.

I don't really understand this. You'd have to tell me more. I do not cast stones, but I may not have the time to give to this right away, the time it really deserves. I am willing though. And I can keep it in prayer in the meantime. I hope you're posting it here will not open you up to other's scrutiny. I would be the first to ask a post be removed it were out of place. I've only done that once when someone began cursing, using profanity, and real ugly attitude. Since this in "my thread" I watch for things like that. I don't want anyone to feel threatened on here, or to threaten.

I would prefer to keep it on the forum rather than pm because of the true believers who have your best interest at heart, the ones filled with the Holy Spirit, walking as Jesus walked, can also be of help. I am not an expert one issues like this, and think it best I not handle it alone. I am simply a follower of the Lord, and have Him living in me. And I love.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

expert on issues like what?
sometimes people's internal references elude me.

as for your caveats, well, frankly the bottom line is, you go poking around you COULD arouse Them and get one of Them at the keyboard rather than me, and at that point, it's not up to me what gets posted. Though you could always have it removed, i suppose, if it bothers you.

 

[CindyisHis]

expert on issues like what?
sometimes people's internal references elude me.

as for your caveats, well, frankly the bottom line is, you go poking around you COULD arouse Them and get one of Them at the keyboard rather than me, and at that point, it's not up to me what gets posted. Though you could always have it removed, i suppose, if it bothers you.

Expert on casting demons out! I know what the Word says, and am ready to act on it, yet I hear you say "But". You're wanting to hang on, so from there we've been discussing it.

Moriah, you don't have to share anything you are not comfortable in saying. Please, don't misunderstand. I'm not trying to get you into a vulnerable place at all.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

it's not my choice, it's not up to me.
you could cast them out if you like -- they would just come back.
the usual laws do NOT apply to me, because *I* am the Habitation. GOD made me this way for HIS purposes.

 

[peacechild4]

Right now I am in darkness and pain because CF is gone.

It's not just the name change and format tweaking. It's that people are bailing on the site, and now there is no one to connect with on here anymore.

Nature abhors a vaccuum. Into the void rushes .... all the darkness. I'm starting to think maybe the reason I try to maintain contact with Christians despite my current "condition" is because otherwise the darkness inside rises up and swallows me completely without reprieve. This bit of contact is so vital to me, it is the tiny eucharist of God that keeps the evil ones from totally consuming me on the spot. As it stands my mind is not my own and i can barely formulate a thought independent of Them, but at least when I'm in touch with others who love God, I feel ... safe.... when they accept me, and remind me to have hope .... without them ... without that .... i will be truly lost to this world and ruined for the next.

Mariah.. I am not planning on leaving either.. the more dark it is.. the more brightly the light shines.. God is in the house!! Where even just two or three gather in His name.. He is in the midst!!

This is not a setback for you have yet to see God childrens shine.. for the darkest night that ever was.. has already passed.. it is when Jesus took the sin of the world on Himself.. and death lost.. satan lost..
See if this world was all there was.. well we would have no hope... but there is a new heaven and earth coming.. and Jesus is seated in heavenly places and He is coming back.. and we are His people have been given His power through His Spirit to do His work.. until He returns or we go to be with Him..

I am here for you.. and so are others ((Thank you Cindy Is His for your encouragment)).. In these dark days.. the greatest out pouring of the Holy Spirit is being manifest.. God has not forgotten us... His plan is going forth.. and I will bind the evil one from you and rob his house.. but want to tell you.. Satan has no hold on you.. Your victory is secure through Jesus Christ.. I got so excited about it yesterday as I prayed for you.. Satan is a liar.. and nothing he says to you is truth.. so if he says.. you can never get away.. He is lying.. He knows you can leaven easily otherwise why tell you.. The Kingdom of God is within your grasp, and it is freedom.. peace.. and joy and love and oh wow.. Mariah so much to come.... He knows Spirit filled believers are around you.. and he knows he has lost the battle.. He just tries so hard.. but Jesus is mighty to Save!!

Matthew 11:12
And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffereth violence, and the violent take it by force.

Isaiah 59:19
So shall they fear the name of the Lord from the west, and his glory from the rising of the sun. When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord shall lift up a standard against him.

Mark 3:27
No man can enter into a strong man's house, and spoil his goods, except he will first bind the strong man; and then he will spoil his house.

 

[CindyisHis]

it's not my choice, it's not up to me.
you could cast them out if you like -- they would just come back.
the usual laws do NOT apply to me, because *I* am the Habitation. GOD made me this way for HIS purposes.

No sweetie, they're lying to you. He did not make you for a habitation of demons. He made you so He can dwell in you. You get to choose which one.

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

I am the Habitation. This is the purpose for which I entered this world -- that of all that the Father gives Me, none shall be lost. I shall carry Them all to the Gates of Heaven, and break Me open at the end; the Wayward Children shall be reunited with Their Father as the Abyss opens inside Me in His presence ... I have SEEN it ... I SEE it even now before Me ... I hunger for My flesh to be torn asunder and removed that the heights and the pit may be One again at last ..... but They are One in Me, and I am One with Them, and I and my Father are One, and I and My Lover are One.

 

[Willowbrook]

No sweetie, they're lying to you. He did not make you for a habitation of demons. He made you so He can dwell in you. You get to choose which one.

So true... Jesus completely defeated satan and his minions on the cross. Satan's only power is what is given to him.

 

[visionary]

I must have misunderstood what you wrote then. It seems like you were suggesting that Christ is returning soon because the earth is covered with more darkness than it was previously.

We are not as it was in Noah's day but we soon will be as sin abounds. Sin is committed in darkness and only the light of truth can reveal it. More sins and secrets, more darkness. Are we not now being kept in the dark about a lot of things and fed ....

 

[CindyisHis]

The Lord does not want to share His people with demons. You have been bought with a price to be holy, pure, and blameless.

Luke 11:17 But He, knowing their thoughts, said to them: &#8220;Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and a house divided against a house falls. 18 If Satan also is divided against himself, how will his kingdom stand? Because you say I cast out demons by Beelzebub. 19them out? Therefore they will be your judges. 20 But if I cast out demons with the finger of God, surely the kingdom of God has come upon you. 21 When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own palace, his goods are in peace. 22 But when a stronger than he comes upon him and overcomes him, he takes from him all his armor in which he trusted, and divides his spoils. 23 He who is not with Me is against Me, and he who does not gather with Me scatters.

24 &#8220;When an unclean spirit goes out of a man, he goes through dry places, seeking rest; and finding none, he says, &#8216;I will return to my house from which I came.&#8217; 25 And when he comes, he finds it swept and put in order. 26 Then he goes and takes with him seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter and dwell there; and the last state of that man is worse than the first.&#8221;



2 Corinthians 6:14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? 16 And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God.


&#8220; I will dwell in them
And walk among them.
I will be their God,
And they shall be My people.&#8221;

As God has said:
17 Therefore



&#8220; Come out from among them
And be separate, says the Lord.
Do not touch what is unclean,
And I will receive you.&#8221;
18 &#8220; I will be a Father to you,
And you shall be My sons and daughters,
Says the LORD Almighty.&#8221;





John 17:20 &#8220;I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; 21 that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me. 22 And the glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one: 23 I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me."

 

[Moriah_Conquering_Wind]

it's just too difficult trying to explain that i've chased after that only to have been ignored and rejected. God doesn't want me Cindy. He doesn't fight for me. He doesn't protect me. He doesn't defend me. He allows others to harm me. I can't trust that. My Guardians protect me and defend me. granted it is chaotic and the price to pay can be high in terms of the suffering extracted from me by humans misunderstanding, but at least .... well ... at least They are with me .... They are with me ... I am not left in isolation against the coldness of the uncaring, harsh, hostile, self-justifying human world alone.

 

[peacechild4]

The reason it feels like God isn't pursuing you.. is because God works through people and circumstances.. If you look for God in His people.. You will see Him at work..

I challenge you also to look.. really have a look at your circumstances.. You can be assured He is right there in them too.. Didn't I read in your blog here at the forums about that night you went out driving determined to harm yourself.. and you were spared in amazing ways??

God has put you on my heart .. imperfect as I am.. His perfection in me... makes me able to do what He says and love people just like YOU!! Because He loved me first!!

(((Hugs)))

 

[vespasia]

For if it was not for God how else could we have meet even online?

 

[CindyisHis]

it's just too difficult trying to explain that i've chased after that only to have been ignored and rejected. God doesn't want me Cindy. He doesn't fight for me. He doesn't protect me. He doesn't defend me. He allows others to harm me. I can't trust that. My Guardians protect me and defend me. granted it is chaotic and the price to pay can be high in terms of the suffering extracted from me by humans misunderstanding, but at least .... well ... at least They are with me .... They are with me ... I am not left in isolation against the coldness of the uncaring, harsh, hostile, self-justifying human world alone.

Let me just saying quickly -
God does want you.

I have to sign off now, I was just checking "mail" as I had only a moment here. But please know, I am taking this to the Lord in prayer.


I will be back.