I think the sticking point is the "eternity" part of it all. I tend to agree with your point generally, that we're responsible for the things we could change but shrug our shoulders at, so you make a good case against folks who say, "I never hurt nobody!". But it doesn't add up to eternity. Even if I'm responsible for all the suffering that happened before I was born, and all the suffering after I die, and in-between, and even the suffering I really couldn't possibly know or do anything about, it doesn't add up to eternity. There's a finite amount of suffering that will exist, so an infinite punishment can not be just.
I think there's a different way to look at it at the level of "archetypal continuum". Keep in mind that I'm not approaching this subject from the POV of strict fundamentalist type of literalism which insists on an extra-dimensional concept of hell where souls are tortured the moment that a "bad person" dies.
In the West, the procedural presets of scientific reductionism and proprietor-driven market capitalism tend to abstract the plurality of "self" and instead present the idea of self as a discreet individual that is responsible for some success or failure. And there seems to be a generic ignorance of the continuum spans over enormous amount of transactions in time and space that are compounded into resultant "I". In the past we used to communicate some plurality of "you" in its adult and mature form, as it still does exist in many other languages.
So, the context of "eternal" is merely a commentary on transcendent nature of that continuum. Some cultural presets may contribute to perpetual suffering of some isolated group of people that could be caught in a perpetual cycle of birth and rebirth in a rather hellish conditions. If you take some isolated parts of this world, it's not that difficult to see that as the case. And as such, certain ideologies may prevent and guard from outside intervention that could break the cycle... and literally lock these people in the "eternal torment" of this cyclical inability to see the problem.
From that POV, the Christian narrative is rather straightforward. In order to break the cycle, one must become "one of" these people in context of engaging that ideology on the ground level, and subversively sacrifice one's self-interest to point out the problem with established norms that perpetuate these conditions. That's a very typical archetype we find over and over again..., for example:
Ignaz Semmelweis - Wikipedia
Of course, it's a poser case for "belief perseverance", but you see all of the recurring themes of Christian narrative of some ideal that's at odds with the present order is "born" in a culture that rejects that ideal. Naintaining existing structural paradigm contributes to its suffering. That novel idea gains some following, but may be rejected and "killed", but if it's subversive-enough, it subsequently "resurrects" and is established as de-facto paradigm, improving and saving lives in process.
But, continual rejection of these ideals results in cyclical hell, which is in that sense eternal.
In a nutshell, that's the archetypal meaning of the Gospel narrative. It creates context and room for subversive ideals to manifest and contribute to our collective well-being, and points out the problem with "killing" the Christ. Of course, these narratives are personified and conceptually communicated by personifying these ideals and ideas in order for these to be memorable. And these narratives case then ironically take the orthodox form of people and entities that we must believe in to be saved to avoid the literal hell and gain access to literal afterlife. But even in that form these tend to ingrain some conceptual framework that incorporates celebration of some form of cyclical injection of novelty, and celebrating when such novelty contributes to cultural progress of some sort. The idea is that we don't need to live in some context of cyclical suffering, and we should both inject novelty and re-examine orthodoxy to see whether it contributes of our suffering.
So, it should be quite obvious to anyone who can notice historical patterns in sociology as these relate to generic progress of humanity that happens through these "jumps" of establishment of norms, some of which turn out to be placeholders for ignorance that many defend as viable. The new breakthrough ideas and ideals surface that challenge these placeholders and rituals surrounding these. Some are killed off. Some survive "death and persecution" and live on to establish the new paradigms... and so on and so on. Of course on the other end of "eschatological context", there are sets of ideas that either seek to intentionally exploit through deception and control, or these are ignorantly perpetuated by adherents through some form of social pressure... so you have the typified narrative of Mark of the beast being in the forehead (knowingly deceiving), or in the right hand (mechanic execution of these ideals).
And then, in a linear context of that timeline (as opposed to cyclical) there are people who follow the beast (our primitive impulses, like fear, hunger, sex and dominance), which leads them to perpetuate false ideology that contributes to cyclical suffering, although it may benefit few. And then there are cultures that follow the other set of ideologies that not only cyclically adopt new and viable ideals, but also build mechanisms for these ideals to make a comeback if these are temporarily disrupted by some disastrous scenarios (second coming analogy), or unification and strengthening of these ideals through numbers that take over and root out the paradigms of the past that perpetuate these "beastly" ideologies.
Of course it's not the typical reading you will find in churches today, because there's currently no conceptual framework to accommodate the "unveiled" context for these narratives, and of course such cultural framework didn't exist in the past. So, these narratives were reified and systematized into ritualistic memorization of "historical fact", which are in actuality serve as a subversive means to instill behavioral and conceptual patterns.
So, these narratives are esoteric in a sense that these were used to establish conceptual paradigm for human progress at the level of individuals and societies where such progress was simply impossible to explain in "plain terms" without it being rejected and killed off. So, now... looking at these with all due diligence of "broader perspective" it makes far more sense for me than it did during my stage of Christian experience, and following state of confronting the dissonance between the literal meaning of that narrative and reality that we find ourselves in. But, I think that the point of these narratives is to serve as that "guiding light" for human development, whether you think these were inspired by some transcendent being or a group of exceptional individuals that launched this ideology to alter historic trajectory... which IMO turned out for our collective best.