Any suggestions?

[heatherwayno]

Does anyone have any tricks they use to get their kids to clean their rooms? My daughter will spend the whole day up there and only clean when she hears me coming. I once banned her from it for a week and she still tore it up again. I was just wondering if anyone else had this problem and what to do about it.

 

[bliz]

How old is your daughter?

 

[MyChristianForumID]

We have been trying the 1-2-3 Magic method for a few weeks.

http://www.parentmagic.com/

It works for our 2, 5 and 6 year olds. We just watched the video and that was it. It's pretty easy to put into practise. But you pretty much have to watch the whole video.

 

[Just4Jesus]

Anyone ever heard of the "Rod of Correction"? LOL
My daughter is 12. I have had more trouble with her in the last 6 months than ever. She is a little to old for spankings, well not really as long as you live in my house, woopings still stands.

Actually, I tell her if she does not keep her room clean, she gets no t.v. or video games. The #1 reason she keeps it clean now is because I tell her, no clean room, no CF!!

Problem solved!

 

[sunshiinedays]

My children have to have everything put away before bedtime, and it's a part of their routine. I also get them to tidy up their things if the house starts to look too messy or if we've got company coming. I make allowances when they're sick, or we're home late, etc. Sometimes they grumble about it, but usually they're pretty good. The few times they have been really defiant about it I gave them the option of putting their things away or in a garbage bag. We all share this house and we all must help maintain it.

 

[greenessa]

You didn't say how old she is. Maybe she actually is overwhelmed by too much stuff to be responsable for. I would remove some stuff and make it easier for her to keep the rest of it clean ie. labeled bins for things dolls, legos, art stuff etc. If she is older I would remove some stuff and tell her she needs to earn it back by showing responsability and appreciation/respect for her things. By older, I only mean 5 or 6 and up. By then they are capable of taking some ownership for their things and actions. Vanessa

 

[Princessperky]

We clean daily, so it doesn't take long, less time spent messing up equals less time spent cleaning, but mine are young. I think for motivation what sems to work with mine when I need speed is something along he lines of 'when done we can go do X' X of course being something a lot cooler than cleaning.

But before you get mad at her take a look, does it look like a HUGE task? if so she may be totally lost in ability not just motivation, walking her through some steps might help (clear off the dresser, or pick up all the clothes) with appropriate thanks for a job well done when it is done. I would suggest a break after a few specific tasks (do you clean for 3 hours straight?)

 

[JoannaJoy]

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[JulySheMustFly]

My daughter was like that. We got to a point where if she didn't have it done by x time we went in with a box or bag and everything on the floor/not in its place went away for a while. She really didn't like taht and lost some of her favorite toys for a while because of it. We only did this twice. Now she runs up to do it and does it catagorically. She finds all the books, then the dolls, then the clothes and so on it goes till everything is done. The other key is to have storage that is age appropriate.

 

[wanderingone]

How old is your daughter?

Eliminate extra "stuff" in the room.. most kids have too many toys and for small kids and kids who are easily distracted at any age too much stuff makes it hard to keep things neat.

Make sure the stuff in the room all has an assigned spot. It sounds silly maybe but I've seen kids pick things up.. look around a room and then just drop the thing back on the floor because they really don't know where things should go .. all they know is Mom wants it picked up.

Small kids really can't just "clean their room" unless you've taught them what that means.. what the steps are.

Kids need a specific task and time limit.. if you have them do something every day they shouldn't end up with a huge mess weekly ..(or monthly.. or whenever you finally have enough and say it's time to clean up that room) My kids spent 30 minutes every evening before the nightly bedtime routine putting dirty clothes in the laundry, getting their stuff together for the next day, putting games away etc.. for big clean ups I set a timer.. "You've got 45 minutes to go through your closet and give me the stuff you don't wear or can't wear anymore" or "You've got 15 minutes to make the bed and tidy up your nightstand" and give them a break between each specific task.

Just sending them off to their room with a mandate to "clean it up" can be overwhelming.

 

[HeatherJay]

I had 4 kids, and it was easier to just train them to keep up with things rather than doing major weekly clean ups. When they were toddlers, I'd pick up with them, but once I knew they'd mastered the skill I made sure they did it and did it right each time they were asked - whether I was right there or not.

I limited toys and things, too. We weeded out toys regularly and I kept about half their things in a large closet. I left the other half on shelves & in toyboxes for them to play with. Every couple of weeks we'd go through the closet and take out things they wanted to use, but for every toy, game or video that came out of the closet - one went in. It worked quite well for us, and by the time the kids were school aged, they did their own rotating and could choose to keep more in their rooms if they wanted, as long as they took care of them.

Once you're sure that cleaning her room is a realistic chore for your daughter, and you're sure she knows exactly what's expected of her, it really becomes a heart issue. When she plays instead of cleaning her room she's choosing to disobey you. She obviously knows it's wrong because she gets to work as soon as she hears you coming.

If she was my little girl, I would go into her room with her, give her a couple of specific tasks (pick up the legos, put the Barbies and all the Barbie clothes away, etc.) and tell her that I wanted those things finished when I came back in 5 minutes. If the tasks were finished when I came back, I'd praise her, tell her how much better things are looking already and give her a few more tasks to do in the next 5 minutes. When her room was finally tidy, I'd make a point of complimenting her on her great work and telling her how pleased I was that she hadn't wasted the whole afternoon because now she'd have lots of time to play or do other things. I'd probably offer her a snack or treat, too, but I'm an easy touch.

If she hadn't the tasks I'd given her, I would take those toys and put them away for a few weeks. Then I'd give her her next few tasks and another chance to obey quickly. If she's stubborn, she might end up with only a few toys in her room, but she'd know that I meant business. After cleaning her room that way for a few weeks, she'd have the skill and desire to pick up her things without so much supervision.

I totally agree. This is exactly what we do with our 4 and 6 year old. Assigning specific tasks is a necessity...along with keeping the toys in her room to a minimum.

We just went through tonight and cleared out a bunch of stuff to donate to goodwill. My girls don't mind giving stuff away...they really love having a clean room, and as long as their favorite things are there, they really don't miss the other stuff.

Best of luck.