Anxiety and Crying in my Car RN

[Angeleyes7715]

I feel so stupid, everything I do is wrong!

I have had to wait 2 weeks for my pharmacy tech job to start because of their long hiring process so I ended up trying to make extra money with side businesses.

I've been trying to tell myself I need to put myself out there and take risks to make money literally everytime I do something it goes horrible and I end up looking stupid and weird.

Here's what happened.
1. I looked up fast food places hiring and I went in a one lady said you need to apply online even though the online said apply in stores. She dismissed me quick and made me feel/look foolish.

2. I called to check the status of a fast food app and the manager told me they'd be having open interviews and repeated what they had on a sign in the store, he sounded annoyed so again I feel foolish -__-.

3. I tried to look into grub hub cause some lady suggested it from another city but I put in my info they aren't in my area.

4. I've tried selling things on eBay. I've even listed stuff that gas a high value I checked, nothing I list sells so it's a waste of time and money and I look stupid for trying in the first place. I anger my bf with these dumb ideas I try after watching videos and reading articles on how to do it.

5. I remembered when I made $75 tutoring once. I looked stupid in front of the girl I tried to tutor cause I couldn't rwmwbrem how to do one of the problems. Still I made $75. So I tried again. I figured it'd be simple to just hang tutoring signs near schools in the area cause I saw somethigs about final exams the other day. Well, I spent $12 on sturdy clear scotch tape and posters. I only hung one though because I started shaking and felt like I'd throw up as soon as I started looking for places to hang signs. I got scared that people were starting at me like I was a weirdo or something so i didn't want to hang any more signs. I also saw something on a post that said no signs on that post so I didn't hang one on that one but close to it I saw someone had hung a yard sale sign so I put mine under it. My sign has my cell on it for tutoring lessons. So now I'm panicking and worried I should go take it down cause what if I get introuble. I figured I see yard sale signs all the time what's the difference....I called the school to ask if I could hang a tutoring sign near the library and the woman told me schools about to be out(finals are in like 4-5 days) we don't need any tutors until August. So I said oh okay and disconnected feeling like a moron once again.

6. I am going in for a open fast food interview and I feel so embarrassed. I know I only need the job until I start my pharmacy job but I'm humiliated.

Everything I do fails and it seems to work for other people. I feel useless and terrible.

Don't forget how I accidentally lost $50 the other day in the first place so I went and pawned stuff found out some of the stuff I had bought fron a wholesalers was expired in the first place -__-.

 

[Brian Mcnamee]

I feel so stupid, everything I do is wrong!

I have had to wait 2 weeks for my pharmacy tech job to start because of their long hiring process so I ended up trying to make extra money with side businesses.

I've been trying to tell myself I need to put myself out there and take risks to make money literally everytime I do something it goes horrible and I end up looking stupid and weird.

Here's what happened.
1. I looked up fast food places hiring and I went in a one lady said you need to apply online even though the online said apply in stores. She dismissed me quick and made me feel/look foolish.

2. I called to check the status of a fast food app and the manager told me they'd be having open interviews and repeated what they had on a sign in the store, he sounded annoyed so again I feel foolish -__-.

3. I tried to look into grub hub cause some lady suggested it from another city but I put in my info they aren't in my area.

4. I've tried selling things on eBay. I've even listed stuff that gas a high value I checked, nothing I list sells so it's a waste of time and money and I look stupid for trying in the first place. I anger my bf with these dumb ideas I try after watching videos and reading articles on how to do it.

5. I remembered when I made $75 tutoring once. I looked stupid in front of the girl I tried to tutor cause I couldn't rwmwbrem how to do one of the problems. Still I made $75. So I tried again. I figured it'd be simple to just hang tutoring signs near schools in the area cause I saw somethigs about final exams the other day. Well, I spent $12 on sturdy clear scotch tape and posters. I only hung one though because I started shaking and felt like I'd throw up as soon as I started looking for places to hang signs. I got scared that people were starting at me like I was a weirdo or something so i didn't want to hang any more signs. I also saw something on a post that said no signs on that post so I didn't hang one on that one but close to it I saw someone had hung a yard sale sign so I put mine under it. My sign has my cell on it for tutoring lessons. So now I'm panicking and worried I should go take it down cause what if I get introuble. I figured I see yard sale signs all the time what's the difference....I called the school to ask if I could hang a tutoring sign near the library and the woman told me schools about to be out(finals are in like 4-5 days) we don't need any tutors until August. So I said oh okay and disconnected feeling like a moron once again.

6. I am going in for a open fast food interview and I feel so embarrassed. I know I only need the job until I start my pharmacy job but I'm humiliated.

Everything I do fails and it seems to work for other people. I feel useless and terrible.

Don't forget how I accidentally lost $50 the other day in the first place so I went and pawned stuff found out some of the stuff I had was expired in the first place -__-

Relax and remember one thing there is no short cut for experience and I am a well established Ebay guy and did not do well at 1st because there is a lot to learn about how to post and what price to expect. So failure in a new endeavor is not unique to you but normal for all. I also home schooled my son through 6th grade. I found out fast that I had to do the lessons on my own with the guide to prepare or I would not remember the rules and all. So again your tutoring experience is normal. Perhaps you could do child care which might be fun and you can bless some folks who need a break. Be thankful that this is a short season of being off and then the real full time work begins. Enjoy this time spend extra time in the word and in prayer and until something paying comes up maybe volunteer at a food bank or something. Today many people cannot find work and even fast food places are competitive to get a job. You are all right and will be fine. Enjoy the humility of the moment and be thankful for the fact it is a short season.

 

[Southernscotty]

Praying for you Angel and It will all work out.
Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

 

[SarahsKnight]

I feel so stupid, everything I do is wrong!

I have had to wait 2 weeks for my pharmacy tech job to start because of their long hiring process so I ended up trying to make extra money with side businesses.

I've been trying to tell myself I need to put myself out there and take risks to make money literally everytime I do something it goes horrible and I end up looking stupid and weird.

Here's what happened.
1. I looked up fast food places hiring and I went in a one lady said you need to apply online even though the online said apply in stores. She dismissed me quick and made me feel/look foolish.

2. I called to check the status of a fast food app and the manager told me they'd be having open interviews and repeated what they had on a sign in the store, he sounded annoyed so again I feel foolish -__-.

3. I tried to look into grub hub cause some lady suggested it from another city but I put in my info they aren't in my area.

4. I've tried selling things on eBay. I've even listed stuff that gas a high value I checked, nothing I list sells so it's a waste of time and money and I look stupid for trying in the first place. I anger my bf with these dumb ideas I try after watching videos and reading articles on how to do it.

5. I remembered when I made $75 tutoring once. I looked stupid in front of the girl I tried to tutor cause I couldn't rwmwbrem how to do one of the problems. Still I made $75. So I tried again. I figured it'd be simple to just hang tutoring signs near schools in the area cause I saw somethigs about final exams the other day. Well, I spent $12 on sturdy clear scotch tape and posters. I only hung one though because I started shaking and felt like I'd throw up as soon as I started looking for places to hang signs. I got scared that people were starting at me like I was a weirdo or something so i didn't want to hang any more signs. I also saw something on a post that said no signs on that post so I didn't hang one on that one but close to it I saw someone had hung a yard sale sign so I put mine under it. My sign has my cell on it for tutoring lessons. So now I'm panicking and worried I should go take it down cause what if I get introuble. I figured I see yard sale signs all the time what's the difference....I called the school to ask if I could hang a tutoring sign near the library and the woman told me schools about to be out(finals are in like 4-5 days) we don't need any tutors until August. So I said oh okay and disconnected feeling like a moron once again.

6. I am going in for a open fast food interview and I feel so embarrassed. I know I only need the job until I start my pharmacy job but I'm humiliated.

Everything I do fails and it seems to work for other people. I feel useless and terrible.

Don't forget how I accidentally lost $50 the other day in the first place so I went and pawned stuff found out some of the stuff I had bought fron a wholesalers was expired in the first place -__-.

It's okay, Angeleyes. You haven't done anything stupid or wrong. It appears from the examples you've written above that you experience some form of social anxiety where you tend to feel self-conscious about the things you do in public where you are seen by others. I understand that if you feel that way, but you are being too hard on yourself. You feel humiliated too easily like the whole world is looking at you like a hopeless idiot, when it really just seems like a relatively small matter is not working out for you presently. ... But it'snot the end of the world.

Again, if the things you've listed that happened recently are making you feel bad, I understand, but surely it isn't as bad as you are thinking? You said you already have a pharmacy tech job lined out for you very soon (I personally say congratulations, by the way; that is no small accomplishment), and you just need to hang on until then. Surely this is some indication to you that God is faithful to look out for you, and obviously HE doesn't think you are hopeless or stupid? I don't know if what I said, helps, but please try to take comfort in that fact. For what it can be worth, I am sorry you appear to be feeling very anxious and sad right now. I promise I will pray that God helps you to get along better with the real world, at least to yours and His satisfaction both, that you are made successful in your new job coming soon, and that things work out to where you are no longer inclined to personally feel as though "everything you do is wrong".

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Everything I do fails and it seems to work for other people. I feel useless and terrible.

Everything you posted is quite common, and many others go through many of the same or similar experiences , FREQUENTLY.

So enjoy DOING WHAT YOU DO, whatever it is.

If you don't like the results DOING something, STOP doing that.

Do what you NEED TO DO, anyway, and ignore the problems/ other people/ while doing what you NEED to do.
You have to do that anyway, so just do it, and pray to enjoy it even, not only to have peace, but also joy while you do.

And see a nutritional health provider to find out what if anything is lacking in your 'system'. There are many inexpensive helps with no bad side effects at all.

 

[Multifavs]

Praying for you Angeleyes. I'm very sorry to hear about all that's happening to you. I'm sorry I don't have any really good advice, but I will say that you are NOT stupid. God loves you and I care about you as well. Pray for God to guide you through this, even when things look rough He is there.

 

[redblue22]

so is it not ok to cry on an rn?