I'll pray for you. Here's an idea maybe?
A short haired cat, that is older in years, that you could adopt?
It would obviously already would need to be fixed, have all of its shots up to date, and be an indoor kitty. Short haired so it wouldn't need constant grooming, or hardly any at all. You could buy some easy toys and things for it like a scratch pad, a ball with a bell in it, and a long plastic stick with something fluffy on the end of it, so you could play with him or her. There are several toys that are pretty cheap, that people can buy for cats.
The sad part is that most middle aged and or older cats most people don't want to adopt, and they prefer the younger ones. The great thing is, if you get an older cat, say 12-15 years old, it would only have a couple of years possibly left. For a lot of those older cats, it's really hard for them to be sold, and unless it's at a no-kill animal shelter, they get put down. So, yes, they'd be much better with you, as a loving caring owner, even if it was only for 6 months to a couple of years, or whatever your situation maybe.
I'm just trying to help. You sound sweet, and there are plenty of older animals out there that need help, and an owner. I was very lonely, before My Mr. Boots came along(he's a mane coon kitty cat). I know how it can be, at least from a lonely aspect, of wanting companion ship, and love, and feeling needed.
I get Mr. Boots Purina Cat Chow Indoor. It comes in a green bag. That's the only thing he likes to eat, which is funny to me(because most cats will eat canned food, and other food, but not him). But I think it helps keep him healthy. The most expensive stuff, I think is the non grain food, but that's a lot more. What I buy I think is not to cheap, but not overly expensive, because you can buy a medium, and big bag for a decent price.
Some actually stayed and slept in my house all day and woke up to hunt in the night. haha
