Thanks for the verses I will highlight them in my Bible.
Perhaps the spirit of God is guiding you in the right direction? Have you asked Him?
Even if you didn't (yet,) you began by asking your spiritual family posing this question.
This isn't much different than someone consulting with their earthly siblings before going to the parents - even in the hope the sibling can/will make an appeal for the cause.
I feel like I am in hiding from social and external/internal forces.
This "pseudo-guilt" is one of those spiritual tactics I was talking about that gets used as an exploiter. Hiding can be a powerful defensive tactic. The Woman (church) that was panged to be delivered was given wings to fly into the wilderness and flee from the Dragon trying to destroy her. This hiding was a direct gift from God - a protection and preserver.
Society is highly
extraverted, and scientifically based (the opposite of intuition is literally knowledge/science.) This may or not be your personality and philosophy. Unfortunately humans are dynamic, and even the most predictable of us cannot fit in a neat box.
This presents a problem when the world has chosen to designate normalcy as something static (like extroversion = fun = $$$ = happy life...) It, therefore, makes sense that anyone who is introverted, or naturally reclusive (especially compared to a "wired" world,) may feel especially out of place in a society that is his or her categorical opposite.
The way the world programs us from birth is essentially a brainwashing of what we "knew on our hearts," and trains our brains to act, and react to status quo. For persons who are spiritually drawn, called and chosen, the dichotomy of flesh and spirit is projected as a psychological and social clash with what the world has said is good.
Smile.
Laugh.
Dont frown, you will get wrinkles.
You are young, you should be doing
...
Why don't you get out more?
...
But, what if you smile on the inside? What if you never stop laughing in your mind/spirit? What if you appreciate the story behind wrinkles, and/or you are simply not that vain?
What if you want to do something to philosophically change the cliche, "Youth is wasted on the young," by NOT wasting it - doing things that are meaningful to you, and from which meaning can be drawn by others?
What if you don't get out in the world because it is an insane asylum in your opinion - but you "get out" with powerful influence and merit via conversations with real people on the internet?
Part of the pseudoguilt you feel is your failure to fit into a box - a box that you, perhaps, feel is necessary for survival in any or all forms. Introversion limits your interactions in the Western world. It can also have an affect on your finances, and life. In one way or another, people who don't "fit in" will be reminded. So, I understand the draw to "fix" what you may see as problems.
I am hoping to make the argument that - especially depending on your own personal circumstances - agoraphobia may be a God-given gift.
From a human perspective, it is certainly a flaw - as society clearly says anyone who doesn't want to socialize with dozens of people all the time, chooses to enjoy solitary company, or doesn't interact with people physically and often is flawed. We even have "centers" for those who "really" don't fit in.
The status quo is dangerous, because it is man made, and as a consequence of that is always at enmity with God. Part of our spiritual battle is diligently and righteously responding to these
physical projections of spiritual assault.
Considering God is infinite (in math, infinity isnt a number, but a generators of the numbers themselves - forever,) His children will be extremely diverse. To feel guilty for being yourself - especially when it is not in offense to God - is an attack on who you are.
Therefore, an attack on your identity as a child of God is an attack on Him. He is patient and merciful, but He doesn't take lightly His children being oppressed. Remember He destroyed the world, an entire advanced civilization with walking gods, and countless "modern" empires - all so that His people are preserved.
While He prepares vengeance for the entities that oppress you, and drive you to anxiety thinking about this, it is up to you to make sure you talk to God about where to go so that you can use whatever "it" is for His glory. That is the overall point.
I think you are already on the right track appealing to the Family of believers - and even persons in general (people who don't even realize, perhaps, they are children of God.)
I get either scared or exhausted when I'm in social situation or when I am outdoors
Well, we just discussed how this could be spiritual oppression. I certainly won't go into further detail, as I feel I may have already been too verbose, previously. Keeping in mind the spiritual exploitation of anxiety, let's consider another aspect...
What is your personality type? You should take a test online and get a general assessment. You sound like you may just be one of the introverted personality types (I am an INFJ - extremely introverted.) Introverts have a tendency to be intuitive - almost to the point of pain. These are the people who say they feel like they are coughing up water - only to find out their cousin almost drowned at or near the same time.
Introversion, like extroversion, can be a powerful tool and blessing from God. My best friend is an extreme extrovert. So, we compliment each other - I don't feel the need to be overly (and awkwardly) sociable, while he doesn't have to worry about "scanning" every single room he goes into for "threats." I am being a bit facetious and hyperbolic in the description of our relationship, but it is close. None of us are meant to be alone, actually. God even says this; we are all built with a draw toward uniting with someone/something else. We are all pieces of a jigsaw puzzle desperately trying to find our EXACT fit - not just the one that works.
So, finding the right company is just as important as assessing and managing your anxiety. Let me ask you a question: do you have NO problem conversing "ad nauseum" with people whom you feel you can thoroughly trust?
I also feel that the devil is in me to an extent. I want to stop feeding the devil and starve him out of me.
It is like Inception: the Enemy makes you feel silly for what you think is agoraphobia. This can be accomplished through other people, feelings, etc...
That guilt turns into worry: "Am I really doing something wrong?"
That worry turns into frustration.
Frustration turns into embarrassment.
Embarrassment turns into obsession...
Obsession turns into phobia...
Then, you feel silly for entertaining a phobia altogether.
REPEAT
Of course, there will be variations, but this is to highlight the cycles that the Enemy would exploit to keep you in unhealthy fear. If you want to break the cycle, perhaps find the similar cycle in your life, and then BREAK IT, or ADD SOMETHING to manipulate the "code/cycle": The Word of God does this. The red text is meant to break the cycle at its respective place of assault with Truth.
Morning Prayer, and real "talking" to God like a son talks to his Father. (This heavily retards the confidence of the enemy from the beginning.)
The Enemy makes you feel silly for what you think is agoraphobia. This can be accomplished through other people, feelings, etc...
"For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men,
Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded.
In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity,
Sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you.
Exhort servants to be obedient unto their own masters, and to please them well in all things; not answering again; Not purloining, but shewing all good fidelity; that they may adorn the doctrine of God our Saviour in all things.
Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world;
Looking for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ;
Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good works." Titus 1:7-14
That guilt turns into worry: "Am I really doing something wrong?"
"My son, eat honey, for it is good, and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste. Know that wisdom is such to your soul; if you find it, there will be a future, and your hope will not be cut off." Proverbs 24:13-14
"Trust in the Lord, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
(!) "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid." John 4:27
That worry turns into frustration.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
"And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9
"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." James 1:2-4
Frustration turns into embarrassment.
Remember: "Those who oppress the poor (finance and spirit) insult their Maker, but helping the poor honors him." Proverbs 14:31
Remember:
"But the LORD reigns forever, executing judgment from his throne. He will judge the world with justice and rule the nations with fairness. The LORD is a shelter for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble. Those who know your name trust in you, for you, O LORD, do not abandon those who search for you."
Psalms 9:7-10
Embarrassment turns into obsession...
"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." Philippians 4:8
"And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32
"I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me (Christ) you can do nothing." John 15:5
Obsession turns into phobia...
"For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:13
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6
"For God gave us not a spirit of fearfulness; but of power and love and discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7
Then, you feel silly for entertaining a phobia altogether.
"Better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble with it." Proverbs 15:16
"He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength." Isaiah 40:29
"Fear not, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom." Luke 12:32
You can take any of these verses and read the full chapter/book for even more enrichment. In fact, that is encouraged.
Fight it with Truth, and the "other side" will tire and die out. The devil isn't "in you," but the Enemy is certainly exploiting anything it can to oppress you. The Truth will drive it out.
It is a fight - and a spiritual one. So, don't expect that you will immediately be phobia and "Devil" free. You could be - that is certainly a possibility directly proportional to faith. But, know that you may have to continuously try and break the code/drive out the enemy with Truth. It could take years. Either way, the other side will tire out and flee before you become fatigued.