- Nov 2, 2003
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Hey guys, I don't know if any of you have experience with this, but we're in a bind and need advice.
My grandparents have two adult daughters, both of whom live in the same town, about two hours (on a horrible road) away from them. My grandparents ' siblings are all either dead, moved far away, or in worse shape than them. They have friends and family in their town, but none of these people are in the position to be any help, either in an emergency or in a long-term situation, to my grandparents. The town is also two hours away from the nearest decent hospital, and probably three from the nearest good hospital.
Anyway, my grandparents are getting up there. My grandpa has dementia that comes and goes, and is sometimes severe. My grandmother is in great health for someone her age, but taking care of my grandfather is way more than she can handle in the long run. My mother, who is retired, and her sister, who is not, basically take turns driving there once or twice a week to take care of some situation, either a legal thing my grandparents don't understand, my grandpa's dementia being particularly bad, or my grandmother being too sick to handle everything.
Everyone's life would be way better if my grandparents would just move to where their kids are. But they won't. My grandpa is convinced every time he leaves his town that he is being taken to a home, so sometimes you can't get him in the car. I think my grandmother thinks that moving in with her daughter, or even moving near to them, would mean she was helpless. So, they won't move.
Anyone have any experience with this? Strategies? Books?
My grandparents have two adult daughters, both of whom live in the same town, about two hours (on a horrible road) away from them. My grandparents ' siblings are all either dead, moved far away, or in worse shape than them. They have friends and family in their town, but none of these people are in the position to be any help, either in an emergency or in a long-term situation, to my grandparents. The town is also two hours away from the nearest decent hospital, and probably three from the nearest good hospital.
Anyway, my grandparents are getting up there. My grandpa has dementia that comes and goes, and is sometimes severe. My grandmother is in great health for someone her age, but taking care of my grandfather is way more than she can handle in the long run. My mother, who is retired, and her sister, who is not, basically take turns driving there once or twice a week to take care of some situation, either a legal thing my grandparents don't understand, my grandpa's dementia being particularly bad, or my grandmother being too sick to handle everything.
Everyone's life would be way better if my grandparents would just move to where their kids are. But they won't. My grandpa is convinced every time he leaves his town that he is being taken to a home, so sometimes you can't get him in the car. I think my grandmother thinks that moving in with her daughter, or even moving near to them, would mean she was helpless. So, they won't move.
Anyone have any experience with this? Strategies? Books?