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Advice for the engaged
- Thread starter Glorianna
- Start date
Manna
Well-Known Member
Rule #1 -- Don't sweat the small stuff
Rule #2 -- There's a WHOLE lot of small stuff!
I think it's very important to ask yourself this question in the midst of a "debate" with your partner.. "Is this topic important enough to be turning us against each other?" More often than not, it's teeny tiny in the big picture. I have seen WAY too many newlyweds fighting over the most trivial things. It's not worth it, people!!! Take my word for it, life is too short...cherish every moment you have, and let the small things go!
Rule #2 -- There's a WHOLE lot of small stuff!
I think it's very important to ask yourself this question in the midst of a "debate" with your partner.. "Is this topic important enough to be turning us against each other?" More often than not, it's teeny tiny in the big picture. I have seen WAY too many newlyweds fighting over the most trivial things. It's not worth it, people!!! Take my word for it, life is too short...cherish every moment you have, and let the small things go!
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Thanks so much Manna. That's good advice for ANY relationship, not just an engagement or marriage! 
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Yitzchak
יצחק
- Jun 25, 2003
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Whatever probelms you face, Face them together as a couple. Don't allow division to come between the two of you.
If you want to work on the relationship mutually, awesome. But whatever you do , do not try to change your spouse. If there are areas to grow in, they should be approached as a mutual project to benefit both of you and never as an attack one against the other. Save constructive criticism for marriage seminars, counseling, or other such things where it is a mutual effort to improve the marriage. Once you divide half the battle is lost already and the thing you were trying to change in the other one becomes secondary to the fact that you have changed the relationship from a mutual one to an adversarial one.
If you want to work on the relationship mutually, awesome. But whatever you do , do not try to change your spouse. If there are areas to grow in, they should be approached as a mutual project to benefit both of you and never as an attack one against the other. Save constructive criticism for marriage seminars, counseling, or other such things where it is a mutual effort to improve the marriage. Once you divide half the battle is lost already and the thing you were trying to change in the other one becomes secondary to the fact that you have changed the relationship from a mutual one to an adversarial one.
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This is such helpful advice i'm putting it all into a Word document and sending it along to my SO.
thank you all!
thank you all!
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