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A Screwtape Letter for Today

Discussion in 'Current News & Events' started by John Lorne, Apr 2, 2020.

  1. John Lorne

    John Lorne New Member

    United States
    My dear Wormwood,

    High Command has given us a most glorious opportunity. At this very moment the Lowerarchy is brewing up a powerful and awesomely great disease in the far reaches of the Orient. “Why, affectionate uncle, should I concern myself with this far-off plague?” you may ask. This is why: the implications of the spread of this plague could do wonderfully to reverse some of the progress your patient has made, and cover up your grave mistakes. I once again ask you to turn an ear to my good advice on how to undermine the Enemy’s hold on your patient. This pandemic can help us a great amount if we use it wisely, and you can’t afford another foolish failure.

    The first trap you must avoid in this case is to make the patient afraid. As we have seen time and time again, a fear on this global scale can be a terrible tool for the Enemy. He has been known to “redeem” a fear like this leading to one of his wretched revivals that give yours and many other patients hope and empathy for their fellow man. This must be avoided at all costs! Unity is a chief tool of our most hated Enemy, so at this time you must help your patient to focus inward. Instead of large fears, settle your patient into small, more selfish fears. What will happen with his job? Has he saved enough to weather this storm? Once again I ask you to use well the tools our Father has provided. The pursuit and coveting of money has always been a friend to us, and is once again a crucial tool in distracting your patient from the Enemy.

    Next, carry this selfishness into hatred and anger. I have heard good reports from other tempters, a good bit better than you, that this has been an effective area of distraction. Looking outward, your patient, by your guidance, can begin to see how everyone one is inferior to him and most assuredly out to get him. You must act quickly to turn this into Pride, so that he begins to build for himself the kind of high horse that will be all the more amusing for us to knock over in the End. High Command is working on a mass propaganda push to rebrand this outbreak as the Chinese Virus, and lead to a wonderful increase in hate and resentment in the form of Racism. This will only be good for us, as a hateful heart is one more easily persuaded to join us.

    Pay special attention to this final bit of advice because I do not know when you will get another opportunity like this. Up to now you have failed in many respects, but the one I believe is most asinine is your failure to remove your patient from interaction with his friends, neighbors and other negative influences. During this global pandemic, the Bureau for Conventional Methods has issued a memo that isolation is to be a nearly universal tool implemented by our tempters and you have utterly failed in this regard. It is my hope that you rectify this mistake, so I can avoid filling the requisite paperwork explaining your idiocy. Isolation, at this time, is a great tool for us because it works directly contrary to the Enemy’s image on your patient. These disgusting creatures were built for community and connection, but we must utilize this gift from High Command to its fullest potential by cutting your patient off from that connection. If you can cultivate a true and crippling sense of loneliness in your patient the result will be the most amazing feeling of inadequacy and irrelevance that he has felt in his whole life. By simply cutting off his internet connection you can remove any connection he has to the outside world and the human government has done the rest by seemingly placing everyone under house arrest. So, while he’s silently and solitarily suffering you have free reign to fill his mind with any of the most amazingly devious thoughts. Whatever is false, whatever is lowly, whatever is wrong, whatever is vile, whatever is unpleasant, whatever is shameful, if there is anything despicable or self-serving, have him think on such things. For idle hands are our Father’s favorite place.

    Your affectionate uncle,
    We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today?
  2. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

    ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) a social experiment!

    United States
    Hello, John. Welcome the Forum. I don't know if what you posted is your own work or a copy and paste job. Nevertheless, it's remarkable. Enjoy your stay in the confines of CF. I look forward to reading more of your posts. If they are anything similar to this gem then I'm sure they will be a hoot.


    P.S. Your ode to Lewis could not have been at a better time. I just had the audiobook of his Space Trilogy playing prior to reading your thread.