A Look at Online Dating for Catholics: Benefits, but Also Risks

[Rhamiel]

I met my bf on plenty of fish. He is a wonderful person and is well-adjusted. Has a job, responsible, doting and affectionate. So not everyone is a crazy person!

But it's true that you can't expect to meet a good match in your own parish community. Eligible Catholic men are like unicorns. Even moreso if they actually believe what the faith teaches. I'd like to meet one. They're rare.

yeah... I go to a kind of small parish
the average age is probably 52

not that many people in my age range
out of them, I think I might be the only single
I know I am the only white single (I am not racist, but the Mexican community in my parish is kind of close knit, I do not see any of the Mexican boys or girls having an Anglo significant other)

 

[Gwendolyn]

My parish is full of old people too. I tried going to a young adults group once but I couldn't relate to the group at all. their way of expressing their faith is very different than mine.

 

[Rhamiel]

My parish is full of old people too. I tried going to a young adults group once but I couldn't relate to the group at all. their way of expressing their faith is very different than mine.

you have a young adult group?
AWESOME!
lol we do not even have that

 

[Michie]

yeah... I go to a kind of small parish
the average age is probably 52

not that many people in my age range
out of them, I think I might be the only single
I know I am the only white single (I am not racist, but the Mexican community in my parish is kind of close knit, I do not see any of the Mexican boys or girls having an Anglo significant other)

You need to come to my parish. Latinos & Anglos marry all the time here.

 

[Gwendolyn]

you have a young adult group?
AWESOME!
lol we do not even have that

my parish doesn't, but the university does. I went a couple times on the encouragement of my priest but like I said, I just couldn't relate. I'm not into folk songs and praise & worship and pop apologetics. I'm more of an introspective, serious theology type.

 

[Second Phoenix]

the guy says online that his name is Dominic, and that he's a good Catholic who believes in NFP, prays the rosary 3 times a day, lives in Steubenville, is best friends with Scott Hahn, and attends the Latin liturgy.

but when he shows up at the girl's door, his real name is Bruno, he's 300 lbs, has a hairy back, is really a lapsed Baptist, is into leather and bondage, thinks Scott Hahn is the ghost writer for Stephen King, only knows "habeus corpus" in Latin and thinks it means "in God we trust" and doesn't live in Steubenville but rather Death Valley, CA. His real career is he is a bar bouncer at Chuck's Boar's Nest in the desert.

How did you find out about me?!

 

[Michie]

How did you find out about me?!

 

[Second Phoenix]

If any women between the ages of 22 to 42 are interested, give me a call. Ignore the woman in my bed, she's a violent transient that made her way in.

 

[Angeldove97]

I pray everyone meets their unicorn.

This made me laugh the most

I'll have to let my husband know he's a unicorn (Although... he wasn't Catholic when I first met him but came into the Church before we were married)

I think what helped our relationship was that it was long distance (Michigan and New Jersey) and we took the time to get to know one another (a year and half before meeting face-to-face). We were using Skype and calling each other, so that kind of helped us realize okay we're not creeps in real life.

When it was time to meet face-to-face, a very good guy friend of mine - a guy who I was thinking of dating if my husband and I didn't hit it off that week - drove me to pick him (husband) up at the airport and we went back to his place first. I didn't realize why my friend was doing that at the time, but I think he wanted to check out my husband before allowing me to be alone with him (husband came along with his roommate- another good friend of mine too so I had TWO guys staying in my dorm room alone with me. )

But yes, there are a lot of creeps out there - during a time when I had broken up with my husband (before marriage) I went on a dating site and was talking to a guy. All he talked about was how awesome he was in high school sports (it had been a few years - like 5 or 6- since he had graduated high school mind you). Really dude - your greatest accomplishment in the last half a decade is playing football in high school? (Great inspiration to get back with the guy who truly loves me and has better accomplishments than that!)

 

[Michie]

If any women between the ages of 22 to 42 are interested, give me a call. Ignore the woman in my bed, she's a violent transient that made her way in.

LOL! I hope that violent transient does not read your posts!

 

[Michie]

This made me laugh the most

I'll have to let my husband know he's a unicorn (Although... he wasn't Catholic when I first met him but came into the Church before we were married)

I think what helped our relationship was that it was long distance (Michigan and New Jersey) and we took the time to get to know one another (a year and half before meeting face-to-face). We were using Skype and calling each other, so that kind of helped us realize okay we're not creeps in real life.

When it was time to meet face-to-face, a very good guy friend of mine - a guy who I was thinking of dating if my husband and I didn't hit it off that week - drove me to pick him (husband) up at the airport and we went back to his place first. I didn't realize why my friend was doing that at the time, but I think he wanted to check out my husband before allowing me to be alone with him (husband came along with his roommate- another good friend of mine too so I had TWO guys staying in my dorm room alone with me. )

But yes, there are a lot of creeps out there - during a time when I had broken up with my husband (before marriage) I went on a dating site and was talking to a guy. All he talked about was how awesome he was in high school sports (it had been a few years - like 5 or 6- since he had graduated high school mind you). Really dude - your greatest accomplishment in the last half a decade is playing football in high school? (Great inspiration to get back with the guy who truly loves me and has better accomplishments than that!)

Glad you went back to your now husband. The other guy sounded insufferable.

I have a question though, those of you that met your spouses on the internet... does that cause trust issues when either of you are on the internet? I doubt it does for happy couples but the thought of getting on the PC & starting a courtship seems pretty easily done now.

 

[Standing_Ultraviolet]

my parish doesn't, but the university does. I went a couple times on the encouragement of my priest but like I said, I just couldn't relate. I'm not into folk songs and praise & worship and pop apologetics. I'm more of an introspective, serious theology type.

I can sympathize with this. I've been to my university's Catholic Campus Ministry before, and it's not so much to my liking. I don't have too many serious issues with it. It's just not my thing.

All campus ministries seem to fall into that to some degree (the folk songs and pop apologetics, I mean). I think that they're trying to be "relevant", but it just seems kind of tacky. On a bit of a more relevant point, people really use them kind of like dating "markets". Maybe it's a good way to meet someone like yourself if you're into that kind of group, but for me, it all just makes most of them feel more like weird social groups than religious organizations (CCM wasn't so bad about that, at least).

 

[WarriorAngel]

Thanks for the laughs.

Well Gwen, thankfully you found someone who didnt seem out in left field.
My friend keeps telling me she is gonna quit that site - yet its like a train wreck - keeps going back.

One fish she caught - she cannot get it off her line. He texts - he calls - he wont let her alone even if she 'broke up with him' not once - but try at least 50 times.

I say he's a stalker. When she 'breaks away' he's like regurgitated barf - back up again.

He isnt nice. He's really not. He 'tries to be' - then the real him comes out. He's a freak.

I wish she'd meet someone nice. But those dang unicorns - - are darn hard to find.

I am thankful i'm not in the dating circle. Way too many weirdo's out there.

You guys all got lucky meeting someone and getting to know them. I believe its the new way to do courtship.
Otherwise - it seems men have hands coming out of every part of their body [says my friend] and thats all they seem to want.

Perhaps online is safest - and someone is forced to know someone else.

 

[MoNiCa4316]

my parish doesn't, but the university does. I went a couple times on the encouragement of my priest but like I said, I just couldn't relate. I'm not into folk songs and praise & worship and pop apologetics. I'm more of an introspective, serious theology type.

I've been to different Catholic groups, of both types!

There's also a young adult group at my parish, which is FSSP. But not every parish has this. The parish at my home town recently started a young adults group.

 

[Virgil the Roman]

It's hard at some parishes to find youth your age. My parish is a Traditional Catholic parish (Hence, lots of large families and a fair amount of folks my age) and it has a young adult group. It's still relatively new. But I've only been once thus far; so, I'm going to give it a shot.

 

[Rhamiel]

I've been to different Catholic groups, of both types!

There's also a young adult group at my parish, which is FSSP. But not every parish has this. The parish at my home town recently started a young adults group.

summer of 2012 my parish tried to start up a young adult group
it did not really go that well
and when school started back up and 3 went back to college in another city the whole Young Adult Group just kinda died out...

I was thinking of going to another parish, but I like going to Mass with my Dad and he is really a part of the parish community at this church