18 yr back home aftee 7 months of city life

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Apr 8, 2019
1
0
23
Marysville
✟726.00
Country
United States
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
In Relationship
I haven't seen them in over 7 months. I snapped at them constantly and I was always in a really bad mood past couple of weeks. I am the only one in the family to have accepted the idea of corporal spanking. the rest of my 7 older siblings turned against those ideas and are all living different lives. The last time I remember getting spanked was when I was 7 when I refused to wear certain suit pants my mom got me. After that i only watched my brothers get spanked all throughout MS and HS. my parents had hard wired my fashion choices too now cause since 9th grade I won't wear anything but slacks and my reasoning for that includes modesty and not following trends that the masses follow... Not influenced by masses rather choosing narrow roads. besides that Logically theirs a billion reasons why I deserved spankings but I never got them. recently I smoked weed on Sunday after taking my mom's car without permission. They found me with 2 friends and escorted me and threatened to send me to rehab via plane in Idaho. I didn't like these threats and I consulted My youth pastor about it because I felt something needed to change. He said that in order for me to repent and change I have to comply completely with whatever punishment my parents decide and then I will see how things will work out. And On my side its worth it because they shared with me possibility of using their house for when I get married and their privileges include vehicles, free rent etc. So I wanted to comply and for the first time I let go of my guard, i still had instincts that carried from long ago I knew that if I wore normal waist size trousers my dad would possibly yank it down so I wore waist size 27 grey slacks, I still had from private school when I was 14. My dress shirt covered my bottom too I was hoping it would help but after bending over the couch he unveiled the slacks throwing the shirt up above the slacks and first used his hand over each clearly separated muscle. It got really painfull when he began to e the belt but at least I was completely covered as my grey trousers protected my ankles tugging up all the way up my arch. it was really hard taking in the pain, it's funny that I'm always thinking about what I could have done to lessen the pain, or thinking about things that are working to my benefit and what's working toward my turmoil. I had so much excess material in the front pleats of the pants, that my cheeks could have utilized to make a more unified singular shape vs what after bending over caused a skin tight presentation which probably is comparable to the ballet boys backside but dressed with a Ukrainian Pentecostal dress code. I really hated the whole thing especially the super obvious ride up, thats exaggerated even more after the bend over and spankings which undid any previous tug downs directed towards reducing separation of the hind. Anyways after reading proverbs I created some reasoning that made everything make sense again. I was clearly ashamed to be spanked and was taking to much pride in images/ideas presented to me by the secular world. I took shame when I realized I'm still the same boy I was in 9th grade wearing the 27 size slacks, but I also realized that I was shaming all the characteristics god gave me. The true characteristics I should be proud of is my modesty, humility, purity and my given undeserved athletic body. Now I believe it's wrong for me to feel shame when I truly represent the Christian qualities Jesus would promote. I always wore my shirt out and now am rethinking that, since wearing it out really just comes from shame and pride for my secular character which disregards modesty or any presentation of purity. But an exception are the grey uniform slacks I always let my shirt travel over those except, until when I got spanked.
 
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