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I went to my family doc today to talk to her about a referral to a psychiatrist. I've finally come to the point where I really do think I have bipolar and I want to do something about it. While explaining my symptoms, my doc says that I am probably a typical young adult who sometimes gets...

It's been a while since I've been to CF. But tonight, I've come searching for anything to send the depression away, even if just for a moment. At night, it's always the worst. It's like it knows all my friends and family are sleeping and I just won't wake them so that they can listen to me...

Anyone who has been around this forum for a long while has seen my back and forth with substances and alcohol. For the moment I am off drugs (both legal and illegal substances, except as needed for colds, but no opiates) and drinking sparingly (in moderation and very infrequently). But I'm in...

I've long wanted my parents to get a divorce. My dad has been an alcoholic all of my life. I remember being a little kid and being absolutely terrified that he was going to kill my mom. I've called the police on him, I've run to a neighbor's house to hide out, I've hid in my room with a knife...

I was sitting here...having a beer and wondering "hmmm...where did I used to spend all my time online?" and remembered that I was often here. For 6 months I was essentially straight edge. Except for caffeine, I didn't do drugs, smoke cigs, or drink alcohol except for the occasional beer now...

It feels like a long ways anyway. I mean, I barely have a hangover, I didn't drive drunk, didn't black out, didn't throw up, and I didn't hurt anyone....but I was horrifically drunk...for the first time, I became a belligerent drunk and tried repeatedly to punch one of my best friends in the...

Hey guys. Been a while, I know...but I'm still alive! Taking in the occasional night of drinking still, but I've cut the drinking back to about once every week or two and only on weekends. I count the number of days between drinking, not to try and make each time longer, just to keep track of...

It's a hard place seeing the lies in shambles. When you're gripping onto them so dearly and yet, at the same time, ripping them apart with all your might. The lies aren't holding you up and the truth has yet to help you stand. Hanging in the balance that is beginning to shake mightily and you...

Man, I was looking up this one chemical to aid in sleeping since I've had to deal with a strange sleep schedule lately (and it's never good for my body or my mental status, so I've been trying to find chemicals that can aid in sleep other than prescription drugs and melatonin). What I continue...

I was really feeling free and happy about ditching the drugs and stuff. Now I'm feeling like it was stupid (the same idea I had before I dumped it). I only found it freeing for a few days. It's so easy to pick back up old ideas this close to dropping them...like bad habits. I have too much...

I've been having a rough time with things, just having winter coming and getting depressed whenever I have a few drinks. In order to properly look at my mental state and discover what's going on with my depression, if it is even depression I'm dealing with, I'm stopping all substances for one...

Well, i've been attempting to get to meetings...running into issues left and right. I'm hoping to attend one over break and see if I can get to one with a more open schedule and a car. So frustrating. I never once thought I'd have any trouble getting to a meeting before I attempted it...

Well, I attempted to go to a meeting tonight, but apparently they hadn't updated the change in location and time on the meeting locator. So I walked around for 20 minutes looking for the darn place. There were some really nice people who helped me out, but I'll try again next week for another...

I read recently that the lack of feeling loved is the root cause of all forms of serious addictions. While this catch-all phrase doesn't seem true to me, I don't think it's a lie. In my own self, when I am spending time with people I love and loving them, when I'm spending time worshipping God...

Last night I was really itching to do drugs. I wanted to find a way so bad. Short of ripping out half the plants in my yard, it would be hard to not find a chemical to put in my body. My mom's away today, so I could have done drugs without much problem, but I really feared that, since none of...

I used to get upset if I would slip up. I'd get depressed, make resolutions, whatever. But when I walk away from God, when I just "live my own life" and act like a marginal Christian, I become a marginal christian...drinking, doing pot, and mildly abusing my ambien. The great arms of evil...

I went to a church service sunday night that we call 'large group' because it is a church made up of many small house churches that comes together once a month. The guy that was talking, he got up and said that he had something else he was going to talk about, but he felt like God wanted him to...

Man, I go months without getting all that depressed, then I slip up and make a mistake and suddenly, I'm all down and feeling bad. All bad thoughts come rushing into my head and it makes me want to cut and drink and do drugs and all sorts of stuff. I just go to a bad place and now I'm unable...

Satan's minions are trying to trick me. He works nonstop to pull me in anyway away from God, even just to compromise with him. "One drink is okay." "You can have one, you aren't addicted anymore." "You're 21 now, have a true celebratory drink with your brother now that you've finally gotten...

Has anyone heard about this or even about john crowder? i've been 'following' this guy for a while now...listening to his youtube videos and I've been to one of his conferences. He was saved from a drug addiction (he did anything he could get his hands on really) through being what he might...