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The problem is that deep down I'm a nihilist. I can't agree with "pop" atheism that secular humanism is logical. I've spent many a study trying to figure out their moral reasoning, and I think it's a pipe dream. To me it's either religion or nihilism. I'm hoping I can stomach the idea of...

Yes, I have been on birth control. I couldn't leave the house on it, and I had to drop my on campus classes. I bled through my sanitary products and pants with 45 mins. I consider myself very lucky in that I happened to sign up for mostly online classes this semester. I ended up stopping the...

Yep, it was part of the blood test. They're not good. That's why they put me on pcos meds, but like I said, that made it worse. I'm pretty good humored about it though. I can live with not being able to have children, if that is my "fate." It's just gross. I've been informed that the longer I...

Yeah I definitely plan to go to coffee hour next time. (Might trick my fiance into coming with again though by bribing him with lunch afterwords ;) ) I didn't know that about the blessed bread. That would have been really good to know. Thank you!

And don't worry about switching majors. I come from a math background. I've seen many a folk who thought they were really good at math, due to high school, who couldn't make it pass a full college level calculus sequence. These were smart, studious students. This isn't meant to bash those...

I'm in my last semester of my degree, and if I had to do it over, I would get something more "practical." I loved the subject I went into, but I would have liked some more options with more job availability.

I have been bleeding for six going on seven months now. I've been through a million blood tests and diagnostics. My primary care started prescribing things for PCOS, but that made it worse. They wouldn't listen to me, so I requested a referral to see an OBGYN. I can't get in until March. I'm...

So, I end up going today. The people were very friendly. I couldn't stay for the coffee hour though. I took along my fiance, and we were in a hurry to get my future step daughter to an appointment, as the service "went over." Everyone kept giving us blessed bread. My fiance can't chew; because...

I appreciate that God doesn't force himself on us. I've just built my whole life on logical deduction and inductions and thinking that was all there was. Now, I'm having what is, obviously, an existential crisis. I am afraid. I am afraid of God. I am afraid of the Church. I am afraid of myself.

It is out of the fear of feeling like I'm talking to myself, then maybe finding out that was true.

Let me say this. I have had a long history with crippling depression and anxiety, among other things, and I understand, to some extent, your emotions. (No one can actually live or truly know your experience fully.) When suffering with severe depression, as you seem to be, it is important to have...

I believe if this desire in me to go to this church is true and supernatural, than it is due to the Holy Spirit. I am simply not ready to talk to God.

I'm glad your experience was positive. One of the problems I've seen in multiple charismatic churches is that the ministers come from kind of "random" and biased Bible Colleges. I'm glad that wasn't the case for you.

That is a GREAT sentiment. I'll keep that one in mind.

That's really good advice, but I have read the Bible. I know what's in it. That's part of the confusion.:)

I'm not Catholic, but I was raised that Catholics weren't Christians. They, on top of that, practiced idolatry. I don't agree with those thoughts, by the way.

No, its not, really. It's more like I'm nihilist what on Earth am I going to church for. What if I'm wrong about going, and I've showed up for no reason. I might not be an embarrassment to others, but I would be to myself.

I was raised in charismatic churches, many of them, due to moving around a lot. Do not take anything I say as a lack of love of charismatic people and their sincerity, but the question was raised. Thus, I will answer, from my experience, why I am not charismatic. It was more of a trend I saw...

So do I. I just hope I'm not taking on more than I can chew.

I will be going to an Eastern Orthodox Church. I've been to churches before. I used to be Christian. Sigh I feel like I am a moth to Christianities metaphorical flames.